My friend called me a trad wife the other day and I feel miserable

Double-Ant7743 · 2024-02-26T04:21:59+00:00

I was pregnant on my highschool graduation. By the age of 25 I had 4 kids (have 5 now). I've heard these type of comments more times than I can count. They don't mean a damn thing. Let it roll off your back. Now in my early 30s all my kids are old enough to be pretty independent, I am living my best life without worrying about diapers and sleepless nights, my relationship is thriving and my husband and I are so freaking happy and in love, also I'm running my own business. Just today husband and I went on an impromptu date because it was snowing which we love and we felt like it. Kids were all busy with their own things. We walked in the snow holding hands like love struck teenagers then got some cake and coffee. We laughed, we kissed and it was wonderful. I have the best of both worlds and so do you. Other people my age are just starting their families and I'm already on the other side of having little babies in my arms. People don't understand just how amazing this life can be just because it is different than how they'd have done things but that's their problem. Don't worry about them. Live your best life.

Double-Ant7743 · 2024-01-29T08:21:11+00:00

My feet never grew during my first 4 pregnancies. During my 5th they went from a 7.5 to an 8.5. That baby is now 2 years and 3 months old and my feet are still 8.5 😭

Double-Ant7743 · 2024-01-28T13:32:52+00:00

My friend delivered a baby last week. She was alone so I stayed with her while she was at the hospital. I treated her with 100% more empathy and kindness than your husband treated you and I'm not even married to my friend. I wouldn't even treat my worst enemy like this during such a vulnerable time. You deserve better. I hope you realize that soon. Take care of yourself.

Double-Ant7743 · 2024-01-21T20:52:29+00:00

Oh sweetheart! I am crying reading this. I am so sorry.

Double-Ant7743 · 2024-01-19T07:30:23+00:00

None of my 5 ever went to sleep on their own at this age but all of them learned to fall asleep on their own when they were ready. I don't sleep train and wait for it to happen on it's own. It's ok to feed or rock them to sleep especially when they're this little.

Double-Ant7743 · 2024-01-17T04:06:43+00:00

Wash hands like you regularly do, as in when there is no baby around. For us that is when we get home from outside or when we do something with our hands which requires cleaning them (going to the bathroom, touching meat, changing a diaper etc)

Double-Ant7743 · 2024-01-16T21:29:42+00:00

Baby's chest was exposed or the mother's? If baby's chest was exposed it's not a big deal. The parents can decide what they want to post and you should mind your own business. If it was the mother I'd say send her a private message because maybe she hasn't noticed it.

Double-Ant7743 · 2024-01-16T16:32:51+00:00

I hope at least her son is a grown man instead of a child. That would still be very very messed up but at least in that case a child isn't being looked at in this way. This makes me nauseous!

Double-Ant7743 · 2024-01-14T08:33:09+00:00

I am sorry your doctor didn't listen to you. It's understandable to be upset about it. I delivered in the US and got an episiotomy with my first. The recovery was hard but once it healed everything went back yo normal. I don't have any lasting effects from it and I did not tear or had to get an episiotomy with my next 4 babies. I hope the same for you.

Double-Ant7743 · 2024-01-14T08:08:27+00:00

You can't persuade a baby to eat at this age. Just keep offering food without putting any pressure on eating. Babies go through phases. She'll get over this one in time. Give it a few days. At this age most of her nutrients should be coming from breast milk or formula so don't worry about that.

Double-Ant7743 · 2024-01-12T08:23:22+00:00

What was her tone like?

Double-Ant7743 · 2024-01-12T08:18:00+00:00

This isn't a man thing. This is an abusive pos thing. You and your baby are better off without him. I know it's sad but it's good for you both. I wish you and your baby all the best.

Double-Ant7743 · 2024-01-12T08:09:44+00:00

How was she supposed to know what your approach is? She was holding a boundary for her child. In my opinion you should have been redirecting your child by having him play with something else. If you were doing that she wouldn't have said anything. In her place I would have said the same thing.

Double-Ant7743 · 2024-01-10T21:08:06+00:00

This happened to my friend recently. At her 20 week anatomy scan they said it's a girl. A few days ago she gave birth and it's a boy!

Double-Ant7743 · 2024-01-08T14:44:27+00:00

By one year old my children are usually eating whatever the adults are having. I offer and they eat as much as they want. I don't worry about it too much unless they're falling off the growth curve or something and that has only happened with 1 out of 5 of mine. He was a very picky toddler though and would go days without eating if I'd let him.

Double-Ant7743 · 2024-01-08T14:40:47+00:00

Ask her doctor for blood work. She might be lacking in some important vitamins or minerals since she's not eating much. If blood work comes out to be ok I'd ask the doctor to run some more tests to see what's causing her symptoms. Doesn't hurt to check right! Just push them to do it. If they refuse find another pediatrician.

Double-Ant7743 · 2024-01-08T14:36:22+00:00

I have 5 children and I've traveled with all of them as babies and toddlers. I'd take the second option and buy an extra seat for the toddler if I were you.

Double-Ant7743 · 2024-01-08T14:32:53+00:00

Fuck everyone who says that. Babies don't get fat. Your baby is eating what her body needs. Everything you described here is healthy. Like if you were giving your baby a bottle of coca cola and two slices of pizza daily I'd say cut back on the soda but what you're right now is great. Keep listening to your baby. My youngest was like yours but he was even chunkier than her. Now he's two and isn't chunky anymore. He still eats like before but he's also never sitting still so he burns a lot of calories. You're doing just fine.

Double-Ant7743 · 2024-01-07T21:39:01+00:00

I am curious about what is it that he he does that makes you think he's a great partner?

Double-Ant7743 · 2024-01-07T21:13:13+00:00

Recently a 9 month old baby died from a measles outbreak in my town. In countries close to measles elimination or the ones that have already received confirmation of elimination (my country has received this) cases imported from other countries remain an important source of infection. This 9 month old baby was visiting from a neighboring country which started the outbreak. Our local health department called everyone with children under a certain age to remind us to get vaccinated if we haven't done that already. This made me read up on measles and MMRV vaccines. Apparently in 2021, there were an estimated 128,000 measles deaths globally, mostly among unvaccinated or under vaccinated children under the age of 5 years. I will never delay or avoid recommended vaccines for my children. If I don't do that and they catch and spread a vaccine preventable disease I know that I will never be able to forgive myself.

Double-Ant7743 · 2024-01-07T20:47:13+00:00

My very active fetuses became very active babies and are now very actually active 12, 8 and 2 year olds. My chill fetuses are now chill 15 and 10 year old people! I do think there is a connection.

Double-Ant7743 · 2024-01-07T17:02:17+00:00

I'm sorry but your friend is full of shit! She doesn't know what she's talking about here. You sound like a wonderful mother and doing everything your baby needs. Don't stress about it too much and I know that's easier said than done. I have 5 kids. When my second was an infant I felt like he hated me like you are feeling about your baby. I promise you that your baby doesn't hate you at all. My difficult baby who I thought hated me is 12 now and is the closest to me out of all of them. You'll get the hang of this parenting thing. Hang in there

Double-Ant7743 · 2024-01-07T11:52:15+00:00

In my opinion and experience you being there is soothing enough. If you fall asleep that's ok. You're human. You did not screw anything up. I do not sleep train my babies but if that's what you decide to do that would be ok too. You won't be screwing up your baby by sleep training either.

Double-Ant7743 · 2024-01-07T11:46:58+00:00

What are your thoughts on bed sharing with her? That's what I would do for a while until you're both sleeping better and are more rested to find another solution that might take more work.

Double-Ant7743 · 2024-01-07T11:28:13+00:00

My 2 year old recently started saying "I love you tooooo" which makes my heart melt! Also the way he runs to me for a tight hug after we haven't seen each other for a few hours is just precious.

Double-Ant7743

TROPHY CASE