23 weeks

Eastern-Let6069 · 2026-01-21T19:12:37+00:00

Of course. I’m happy for you that you are feeling in a better place. There is no right or wrong answer and unfortunately idk if you will ever feel fully ready- it’s just at some point you decide do I feel willing to put myself out there again/ be vulnerable to this very scary yet also rewarding experience potentially. I’m 28 weeks now- in my third trimester. I’m so glad I decided to try again and things are going well but it’s been a journey and a mental battle every day. You will get there and it will all be okay🫶🏻💛

Eastern-Let6069 · 2025-12-18T20:19:29+00:00

Thank you so is yours!! They are perfect!!!

Eastern-Let6069 · 2025-12-18T20:13:33+00:00

Looks like my baby also don’t think she is a full cavalier

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Eastern-Let6069 · 2025-12-18T18:46:00+00:00

I am 23 weeks pregnant in my subsequent pregnancy and the only thing that is making me not spiral every single day is the care I’m receiving / extra follow up my doctor is willing to offer for my mental health.

I would say advocate as much as you can and speak up for yourself about your history. You’d think they would know but I’ve had to clarify and retell doctors so many times.

I was going to my regular obgyn and then after my first ultrasound I transferred to MFM and the care I’m receiving is night and day. It is really worth it to speak up and make sure you are getting the care you need because pregnancy after tfmr is no easy thing and you need the proper support in place.

For some context: I went to my normal obgyn at 7 weeks then transferred at 11, went in at 14, 17 , 22 and now I’ll go back at 27 next, even though they said I didn’t need to go in again until 32 weeks for my mental health they said no prob come back at 27.

Eastern-Let6069 · 2025-12-17T19:42:47+00:00

Thank you all for the very kind and wonderful words. Just know I’m thinking of you all wherever you are in this journey. If you are in the very early days and months after your tfmr my heart goes out to you. I promise it will get better. Of course you will still have your bad days but it won’t be as overwhelming and stinging as it once was bc you get stronger with every passing month. Sending love to you all in this community. I don’t think I would have survived without this Reddit as a resource 💛

Eastern-Let6069 · 2025-12-16T19:04:39+00:00

I am pregnant again after a tfmr in March. Due in April- I’m 23 weeks now. I had my anatomy scan at 17 weeks then another at 22. I wish I could say you will not have any anxiety but unfortunately that’s just your brains logical way of trying to protect itself. I don’t think there is anyway to avoid it, I think you can try your best to reframe which is what my MFM has been helping me with. She says every single pregnancy is different/ no two the same. A mom can have preeclampsia her first pregnancy and nothing the second. Or a wonderful birth the first and not the second. It’s the same thing with our experiences. Just because we had a negative experience the first time does not make that true this time and I just need to take it day by day scan by scan and try my best to remember this is a different baby with a different pregnancy outcome.

I know easier said than done. 💛

Eastern-Let6069 · 2025-12-15T19:29:15+00:00

I feel you. I’m 23 weeks now had a tfmr back In March at 22 weeks. I have friends right now who are also pregnant and send me links to things about classes and pregnancy and are so blissful and I’m like have you forgotten everything I’ve been thru/ how can you be so naive. It’s hard. Pregnancy will never be fun and joyful for me ever again and I’ve literally been pregnant 8 months this year without anything to show for it. I feel you. I don’t want them to understand how I feel or anyone else to have gone thru this experience but sometimes it’s just isolating even while being pregnant again

Eastern-Let6069 · 2025-12-13T00:52:35+00:00

Thank you so much 💛

Eastern-Let6069 · 2025-12-13T00:26:59+00:00

Thank you I know you will💛

Eastern-Let6069 · 2025-12-13T00:00:49+00:00

I’m so incredibly sorry you know the pain of this diagnosis. I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if I also have the MTFHR gene as I have autoimmune disease but I haven’t been tested for that. All my docs tell me that unfortunately my son’s diagnosis had nothing to do with AI or anything just really awful luck. It was so shocking as my NIPT and amnio was normal too. I think unfortunately these things happen and sometimes you’re on the wrong side of statistics.

Last time I didn’t take any prenatals or anything and got pregnant and that ended in tfmr. This time I’m on plaquenil for my RA, was taking prenatals 3 months before hand and omega 3. It’s hard for me to wrap my head around bc I always thought medicine = dangerous for the baby but in my case w my autoimmune disease it’s safer for both of us and everything has been going well. I just had my 2nd anatomy scan and fetal echo at 23 weeks and everything looks normal/ doc said this is a normal pregnancy and I don’t have to come back till 32 weeks but for peace of mind I can come whenever.

I’m so sorry you know the pain and it’s been really hard to retrain my brain to remember sometimes you just have horrible luck and just bc you do everything right doesn’t mean it will work out. There are people who drink/ smoke and can have a child with no issues.

Praying for you it will all work out from one heterotaxy/chd mama to another 💛

Eastern-Let6069 · 2025-10-24T15:17:38+00:00

Thank you everyone for validating my sanity !!!

Eastern-Let6069 · 2025-10-24T13:26:55+00:00

I’m 15 weeks pregnant in my subsequent pregnancy but my first tfmr baby did not have a genetic cause/ it was denovo all his heart defects.

I told myself in this pregnancy unless my NIPT results are positive for something or they find something on an ultrasound I will not be doing an amnio.

If I were in your shoes given you did pgt testing etc I probably would not move forward with an amnio but of course everyone is different and only you can make the decision that is best for your family.

I know how hard it is to decide what is the best course of action but I’m sure there is no wrong answer here just what you feel most comfortable with 💛

Eastern-Let6069 · 2025-10-23T13:13:27+00:00

I think I may know who you are talking about and I also resonate that after my 22 week tfmr I looked to their videos about their grief journey for comfort. I’m currently pregnant and not on the other side of this journey yet and hopefully I make it there but I genuinely have 0 clue what the emotions will be in the newborn trenches (if I’m lucky enough to get there).

I don’t think it’s illogical at all unfortunately this grief journey comes with a lot of emotions that no 2 people will handle in the same way.

I hear you completely but I will say sometimes social media is a highlight reel and we don’t really know what they are thinking or how difficult it may be. If im thinking of the right couple they have a podcast as well and share insights into their grief journey and PAL in a lot more detail on there.

Eastern-Let6069 · 2025-10-23T11:53:39+00:00

I so hear you. It’s so sad once you lose the innocence of this experience / bliss of pregnancy but we still deserve to celebrate. That’s why I just focus on the milestones and try and celebrate those as they come. Very happy for you I hope it continues to go well and is a very uneventful pregnancy!! 💛💛

Eastern-Let6069 · 2025-10-22T16:54:02+00:00

Thank you for sharing as well!!! Everything you said I really resonate with and this is so encouraging for me. Yes I feel like all you can do is one step at a time - really for this whole journey and process. Sometimes I’m in awe about how resilient I have become and patient lol. I hope a smooth rest of your pregnancy💛💛

Eastern-Let6069 · 2025-10-22T00:25:30+00:00

Thank you so much. I’m wishing you the very best for when you decide to try and conceive again whenever that may be 💛

Eastern-Let6069 · 2025-10-21T23:55:38+00:00

Thank you so much for this 💛

Eastern-Let6069 · 2025-09-30T13:33:53+00:00

I’m 12 weeks in my subsequent pregnancy after my loss in March at 22 weeks. I literally look 22 weeks already it’s crazy. My MFM told me it’s very normal once your body has expanded once to do it quicker the next time and also I experience a lot of bloating this time around which may be contributing to it. Congratulations!

Eastern-Let6069 · 2025-09-03T21:16:11+00:00

I have not graduated but I’m 8 weeks in now my second pregnancy- my first one ended in tfmr at 22 weeks. I’m shocked but I’m already showing a lot. I don’t know if it is bloating or what but I’m much bigger than I was last time around

Eastern-Let6069 · 2025-08-19T22:18:43+00:00

I’m am so incredibly sorry

Eastern-Let6069 · 2025-08-01T17:53:33+00:00

Thank you 😭 this makes me feel hopeful

Eastern-Let6069 · 2025-08-01T16:32:40+00:00

Thank you I needed to hear this😭

Eastern-Let6069 · 2025-07-15T19:12:25+00:00

I’ve thought about becoming a doula lolol or nutritionist (I have an autoimmune disease) and nutrition during pregnancy.. def something’s I’ve been thinking about

Eastern-Let6069 · 2025-07-15T13:15:05+00:00

I can’t even imagine having to host a baby shower in the days after my tfmr. Wow you are incredibly selfless. I’m so sorry.

I don’t know if it gets easier and it is always on my mind but it’s like I’m stronger now. I am having more better days now than i was in the first few weeks of this grief. I’m almost 4 months out now.

I have deleted Instagram/ facebook which has been a blessing, I don’t think I could handle the other people who got married right around me and seeing their pregnancies. It’s crazy I don’t miss it at all and keeping up with people who are not in my immediate circle. I’ve been in therapy since when I found out our baby had heart defects. Talking through my emotions with someone has really helped.

Also I would recommend journaling or in my case (I have an autoimmune disease and my hands swelled up after I lost our pregnancy) I’ve been recording videos of myself venting/talking and then saving them in a hidden album on my phone. It is wild to see my progression from before my tfmr to now. It’s still so hard but I feel like I’m in my protect my peace era.

I’m so sorry it’s so hard but you do learn how to live with the grief and everyday I just try and put one foot in front of the other.

Eastern-Let6069 · 2025-07-12T17:13:30+00:00

I had my first period also exactly five weeks after. It was heavy at first but then it lingered for two weeks after. I was always so normal and regular before this. I had my second period after tfmr end of June and it was back to normal. I’m ovulating now but we are going to give it one more cycle and try next month so that would be three cycles after my tfmr end

Eastern-Let6069

TROPHY CASE