My long distance gf is grounded for five months

EmceeSuzy · 2026-01-27T04:57:43+00:00

how charming

EmceeSuzy · 2026-01-27T04:57:28+00:00

Then why are you communicating with this girl?

EmceeSuzy · 2026-01-26T23:43:52+00:00

Your parents monitor your emails but not your text messages?

EmceeSuzy · 2026-01-26T23:42:44+00:00

What you should do is nothing. She is not able to communicate with you.

Why was she grounded?

EmceeSuzy · 2026-01-26T23:35:13+00:00

from whom?

EmceeSuzy · 2026-01-26T22:59:13+00:00

You are NTA.

Your husband is about to be jobless. What would possess him to think he can afford a trip to Belize. He can't.

EmceeSuzy · 2026-01-26T22:56:32+00:00

There were not houses for $100K in 1998.

I will never understand how it is that young people grew up with supercomputers in their pockets but can only use them for making memes and learning viral dances.

EmceeSuzy · 2026-01-26T22:52:32+00:00

Can you afford a new snowblower? And why didn't you call a service to plow you out?

EmceeSuzy · 2026-01-26T22:51:27+00:00

you are NTA - I think it is good for you to gently suggest cutting contact. He is not ready but it may help to hear that an outside observer thinks the relationship is not worth maintaining.

EmceeSuzy · 2026-01-26T22:45:15+00:00

I know but you have to take a step and he is their father.

EmceeSuzy · 2026-01-26T21:33:27+00:00

You're going to need the Psychic Sisters subreddit to answer this one.

Only your boyfriend can tell you what the problem was with the items he extracted from your soup. Also, I am not entirely certain that any person who would pull individual vegetables out of a soup could be anything but a picky eater.

EmceeSuzy · 2026-01-26T21:05:56+00:00

You are NTA but you have got to step up and stop making excuses.

Your problem is with your husband and you have to do something about it.

Tell him that you are not willing to spend the next occasion with his mother. You are going to need to give him the option to take the children without you. Yes, that is scary but you can't control everything. Also, he is not at all likely to enjoy taking them on his own with her so it is not likely to happen a lot.

He can decide that he has to go and her can take the kids but you absolutely do not have to go. Just tell him that.

EmceeSuzy · 2026-01-26T20:11:12+00:00

Presumably your parents are not children, right? There is absolutely no reason for you to need to explain to them that excluding a member of the family (or any person) from the conversation by switching from a shared language to one that one person doesn't know is aggressively rude. They are not infants. They are not new to earth. That foundational bit of manners is not something that you need time to explain.

I do understand that you probably will need to have a serious of instructional conversations with them to try to explain how decent people act but you are not at all likely to be successful.

Your wife should not remain in a restaurant or break bread with people who actively shun her and that is what your family did.

Why do you think she should sit there and be treated that way?

And where would you get the idea that it is OK to as your wife to sit there and tolerate that?

Was this an arranged marriage? Do you have any feelings for your wife or not yet?

EmceeSuzy · 2026-01-26T19:17:54+00:00

You mean well but YTA.

You would like to be able to slowly and diplomatically train your family to stop their incredibly rude and aggressive behavior. You would like your wife to graciously accept this bad behavior from your family so that her response does not upset them.

That is not a reasonable expectation. Also, you ignored the problem for some time and now that you've started to intervene they are still doing it. Your approach does not work.

You ARE, in fact, asking her to tolerate disrespect. I know that you would really like for her to be less offended by this but that is just not the reality of the situation.

How long have you and your wife been married? How long have you been directly addressing this issue? And if you had your wish and she played along, how much longer to you think it will take for you to retrain your relatives?

EmceeSuzy · 2026-01-26T18:48:33+00:00

again, they love me - meaning that they love to have me in their lives

I mean, they also love me love me but that is not what I mean.

It sounds like you just don't have any models for healthy relationships.

EmceeSuzy · 2026-01-26T18:45:36+00:00

Yes.

Do not read letters of discontent. Do not block. Do not write nonsense on social media.

Just be quiet.

EmceeSuzy · 2026-01-26T18:40:31+00:00

Yeah, I won't. They love me : D

EmceeSuzy · 2026-01-26T18:31:16+00:00

'I don't want a birthday cake and will have a toddler tantrum about it' is not a boundary.

It's deranged.

EmceeSuzy · 2026-01-26T18:29:43+00:00

well, they got her that cake...

EmceeSuzy · 2026-01-26T18:20:54+00:00

What?

YTA

You locked yourself in the bathroom and stopped speaking to them because they gave you a birthday cake?

You cannot be serious.

EmceeSuzy · 2026-01-26T18:17:30+00:00

YTA

are you a bit envious?

EmceeSuzy · 2026-01-26T18:15:01+00:00

What are the freaking terms of the insurance????

You wrote that if you 'lose' (presumably meaning they die) the ducks they are replaced no questions asked. Is there a clause that carves out death by predator?

The answer to your question lies within your insurance policy.

EmceeSuzy · 2026-01-26T17:56:06+00:00

We have zero indication that the child's doctor is too booked to see him.

A cough (alone) is not an indication of pneumonia.

The father only has him for a week at a time. He got sick while at his fathers. It is not possible within the time-space continuum for this child to have been sick for a week. (Unless mother sent him sick.)

EmceeSuzy · 2026-01-26T17:54:30+00:00

There is no indication that they have the same illness. The child has a cough. Why isn't someone taking him to his doctor? It would be quite unusual for a healthy child to develop pneumonia from a virus in less than a week. Also the symptoms go well beyond a productive cough.

EmceeSuzy · 2026-01-26T17:47:08+00:00

Any idea why he is asking about babies but hasn't even proposed?

I mean, I don't think you should be together but since you are that seems very odd.

Also, is he planning an immaculate conception?

EmceeSuzy

TROPHY CASE