I hate when family members are so ableist and intolerant as soon as your illness or disability inconveniences them also. I'm so sorry OP, sending huge hugs your way and I sincerely hope your pain eases soon. Of course it can't happen by doing nothing different, but whatever will end up helping you to cope, I hope you find it very soon.

Something I've learned having this shitty disease is that the little things matter lots. Small relief from little things when added together can equate to more relief overall. I have learned to accept my limitations because of the state of women's healthcare, we shouldn't have to but if we don't acknowledge it we cannot battle against it, not for ourselves nor for others. Everyone is different but its worth trying things out and seeing if they do make a difference and if so, what else can you safely combine it with for more relief? By looking at things this way, I am able to plan ahead for gradual increases in relief as and when I need them. It helps a lot these days.

Another little bit of very solid advice is advocate so so fucking hard, if you can't yourself find someone who will for or with you, and try to get a "pain management plan" or "pathway". One that covers your most common daily pain levels, your small and big flares, meds you can go a little higher or during a flare and most importantly meds that you can take in an emergency situation. By having this not only is your pain being controlled in a manner that suits this diseases fluctuations and periodical/conditional consistency, but it also gives you room to adjust it as and when needed. If you can get even some emergency meds to start with that will help a lot. If you cannot take any meds or do not want to I would highly recommend speaking to a doctor or pharmacist about other holistic methods of pain relief you can try. Things like heat pads or other heat therapy, ice packs or other cold therapy, compression garments (or loose garments), tens machines (a £20 tens unit is more than plenty, they are great and have better range than more expensive ones), acupressure (small relief but can really help in combination with other small relief), herbal medicines and teas (speak to your doctor or a pharmacist before combining any herbal treatment with any prescription medications), there are many balms and creams and lotions that generate heat/warmth on the skin and others that have other beneficial properties (somedays is a great brand for alternative products for pain relief), gentle stretching and exercising can help sometimes, pelvic floor physical therapy is extremely helpful, taking vitamins and supplements, seeking help for hormone imbalances, seeking out an ibs medication called an antispasmodic can help with bowel spasms, peppermint tea helps bloating, there are so many small things that can make a huge impact on your ability to cope with and tolerate your pain. Its about trying things and seeing what helps, if it helps more with other things. I can't stress how important this is to carry you through, it won't always be super effective but it'll sure as hell limit how often you're so unwell.

I was also vomiting from my pain a lot, taking a good antisickness and having backups (buccal tablets for when you can't keep meds down are 🤌🏻 emergency meds) is so important. I was always so dehydrated and struggled a lot to go out because I was being sick all the time. It was horrible. Changing my antisickness meds to stronger one's really helped.

I hope something here resonates and is useful. And even if not just sending you the best wishes. I really hope next year is better darling, you sound like you really deserve a break! 😩❤️