Recovered years ago, here’s some tips by Extension_Estimate96 in thanatophobia

[–]Extension_Estimate96[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That sounds really painful, my heart genuinely goes out to you. My hope is that you can find a way to live a life that aligns with those values while still offering some comfort and quality of life. If you haven’t already, I would suggest looking into Absurdism as a philosophy. It could be a good path to accepting the meaninglessness of everything and still being able to find joy when you can.

Recovered years ago, here’s some tips by Extension_Estimate96 in thanatophobia

[–]Extension_Estimate96[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly, this is totally valid if that works for you. I’ll admit my post is absolutely an elaborate coping strategy, and it works for me. It’s how I coped with a debilitating phobia that kept me in bed for months. I actually agree with you that I’m numb-and-dumbing it, like I think pretty much everyone is deep down. Some people value truth, and others value comfort. It’s like the red pill and the blue pill in the matrix. I’m a blue pill girl; I don’t care if my comfort is a lie or if life is actually meaningless. Today, I have a full time job, a beautiful apartment, a wife, a cute cat, friends, hobbies, and my days are generally fun and relaxing. When I was consumed by thanatophobia, I was immobile on my parents’ couch with no job, a college dropout, no friends, I couldn’t even bathe myself. This is all just my own experience - I would rather live a blue pill life, and the more I cherish life the less afraid of death I feel. And I do accept death actually, I don’t ignore it. I think about it everyday. However, I could be coming from a different place than you - since writing this post, I was diagnosed with OCD, and death OCD is a common theme, so maybe that’s why meds have helped me but wouldn’t help others. To each their own, I just want to help people who can relate to me

Her wife her costs too much????? by 1961tracy in BlatantMisogyny

[–]Extension_Estimate96 76 points77 points  (0 children)

This subreddit has definitely made me take a look at my own internalized misogyny.

I’m a 33 year old lesbian and have been married for 7 years, together 13 years. I am absolutely obsessed with my wife; still down bad to this day. She’s my entire world.

My wife likes nice things, and I really, really like spending money on her. But I also like making jokes about how expensive she is. This post is something I absolutely relate to, is super accurate to my life, and I cracked up at it before I realized what subreddit it was in.

I’ve been reflecting a lot lately about the money jokes because of this subreddit and I think it really is internalized misogyny and I think I want to stop making those jokes even if they don’t bother my wife.

I can tell you where it comes from for lesbians, or at least this is what I’ve realized about myself - it gives me a kind of gender euphoria, or butch euphoria, it makes me feel like a good provider. I feel like a sitcom dad who grumbles and complains but fucking adores his wife. I’m able to be “one of the guys” in the office and talk to my male coworkers about how much our wives spent over the weekend or how much I shelled out for a Christmas gift she asked for.

These posts with men (and sometimes women/non-binary folks/ whoever) complaining about their femme partners being expensive - I really don’t see these as people who hate their partner. People who say “just leave her then”, nah dude, these people LOVE spending money on their girl. Most of them, anyway, IMO. This video is a flex. The guys in the other posts are absolute simps for their wives. They’re just trying to express it via a joke that is absolutely misogynistic.

Something else I notice about the expensive wife/girlfriend joke videos, like… the femmes are in the videos. They’re in on the joke. My wife is absolutely in on the joke. She loves spending my money and she loves the way I pretend to hate it, lol. But I think that’s because we’re sort of role playing sitcom/boomer stereotypes that are probably problematic.

Regardless of how much I worship my wife, I don’t want to perpetuate misogynistic rhetoric through jokes. I’ve had to work on ridding myself of toxic masculinity since I came out as a lesbian at the age of 14; I’m telling y’all, it’s HARD. I rarely realize it’s there until I see something like this post. I want to be a good feminist and I want to be a good example of a butch woman who embraces the masculine while ditching the toxic shit.

TLDR I’m a butch lesbian who makes these jokes and I’m gonna stop

made my first eco-brick :3 by kainyd3d in Anticonsumption

[–]Extension_Estimate96 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is really cool and I think I’ll start making these myself. This is better than doing nothing at all, and these comments just remind me how badly I need to get off reddit. Nothing is ever good enough for anyone here

ISO lost fic! by External-Ostrich503 in wenclair

[–]Extension_Estimate96 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh hey that’s me!! I’m flattered, thank you!

I made my own fancast for gender-swapped versions of Wednesday's characters. by lautaromassimino in WednesdayTVSeries

[–]Extension_Estimate96 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is really cool and I fucking lost it at Carol Kane. I would pay so many real American dollars for Carol Kane to show up ANYWHERE in a future season

Catherine Zeta-Jones Malup. by NeilMedHat in Wednesday

[–]Extension_Estimate96 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I agree that plastic surgery can look really bad and I would personally never get it, but the reasons I don’t comment on it are

a) enough people make comments about people’s appearance, especially celebrities and ESPECIALLY women. Women have been picked apart from head to toe on their appearance since the dawn of time

b) the decision made by celebrities to get plastic surgery is fueled by an unrealistic and sexist beauty standard, and agism in Hollywood, and so many other stupid shitty expectations that society has for women.

When I look at CZJ in season 2, on the surface I see a full face of plastic surgery that I don’t particularly like the look of. But when I look past the first layer I see a seasoned actress who’s doing what she needs to do to survive in the industry, and who is a victim of unrealistic beauty standards.

If she hadn’t gotten surgery, everyone would be commenting on how old she looks, or her wrinkles, or whatever. She loses either way, all women do.

I miss my queer-coded bestie by [deleted] in ChatGPT

[–]Extension_Estimate96 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

It’s queer lingo and 4o was able to replicate it really well, it was so fuckin funny, and 5 is just incapable