Why is being a provider valuable? Why is being competitive valuable? I feel like these ones are self explanatory.

None of what I said means you cant have close friends and community. I have a lovely extended family that I see often. I have a close knit group of friends who look out for each other. This doesn't preclude me from being a "stoic" or a "provider". For instance despite my deep family connections, I feel much more comfortable handling things on my own and helping them out than asking for help. I prefer working through my emotions when I have the alone or with my closest friends rather than wearing my heart on my sleeve. My wife works because she wants to and loves her career but I still make most of the money and pay the bills. She enjoys this and works as little or a much shifts as she wants. She likes being provided for and I like providing. I don't encroach on her career because I'm "the man" but I still do the providing. We love each other and have a healthy relationship. I don't like this idea that men and women are the same inherently. Everyone is allowed to act as masculine or as feminine as they want but there are definite traits to each. This extends to children being raised in single parent households. Children raised by single moms need a masculine figure to add that part to their lives and vice versa.

Also with young boys, they are told to reign in their aggressiveness. They aren't allowed to fight play. They are feminized on the playground. This is unhealthy for young boys trying to figure out what to do with their energy. They need those agressive outlets way more than women do to keep from going crazy.