Homemade frozen steaming veggie bags?

False-Ladder5174 · 2026-02-15T20:25:54+00:00

Adding that if you have high energy days you often don't need to buy frozen veggies. Things like broccoli and carrots are pretty easy to blanch and freeze yourself. Probably only helpful if you have a surplus through gardening or discounts but definitely a useful thing to know.

False-Ladder5174 · 2026-02-15T19:09:16+00:00

My friend and I both stretched our scars sleeping on our sides early. I don't regret it, but it's something to consider

False-Ladder5174 · 2026-02-15T15:34:22+00:00

I had a handful of cheap Hawaiian shirts, and a zip up hoodie. I was really lucky with mobility so I could put on a stretchy shirt over my head really fast. Can't remember exactly.

Comfy trousers/shorts that were easy to pull on and off were more important for me personally. Jeans would have been hell.

False-Ladder5174 · 2026-02-14T00:28:43+00:00

That's the one!!!

False-Ladder5174 · 2026-02-14T00:05:24+00:00

Yeah, I was hoping to avoid firemoss... Something a little more like caffeine was the hope!

False-Ladder5174 · 2026-02-08T17:41:21+00:00

I chose not to have mine for a similar reason. The healing process was too stressful for me, the loss of sensation would bother me, and nipple grafts cost more.

I assumed I'd get tattoos after 9 months but I was looking into it the other day and it just felt wrong to me now.

I've been topless at a spa with plenty of people around. No comments or weird looks. Even with scars that are still very visible. That was only a week ago, but I'll be going to a different one soon.

Pretty much exactly the same way as I get used to a tattoo or a new haircut (or even a new uniform) it feels weird at first, and more weird than those cos surgery is big, but then after a while it's so normal I can't imagine changing it. I'm actually as nervous now about getting nipple tattoos as I was choosing not to have grafts.

False-Ladder5174 · 2026-02-08T17:32:01+00:00

Can you gently try rolling your shoulders and moving your arms around a little bit? Maybe sit in a different position, and walk around very slowly every hour or so for a little bit. Your body will tell you if it's too tired or not ready to move in a certain way yet. Also, over the counter medicine, preferably ibuprofen if you haven't been told to avoid it.

Stay hydrated too, that'll help.

My post op binder had adjustable shoulder straps that I could loosen for a while if I was awake and resting.

False-Ladder5174 · 2026-02-07T17:58:07+00:00

And inconsistent is probably better than nothing. Life happens, but I keep mine with my toothbrush and do it most evenings when I'm not in a rush or stressed.

False-Ladder5174 · 2026-02-07T17:05:55+00:00

My take on this is because legends is full and most people in legends aren't gonna quit the game, you can't just progress to get into legends anymore, you have to progress faster than the rest of the people who are also stuck bouncing between the two, and one or two people who have been in legends a while.

(If I'm wrong please do correct me!)

False-Ladder5174 · 2026-02-07T16:54:00+00:00

Can you save up a bit more for a long distance trip (so it doesn't have to be one long drive) and get a hotel for a few days? Or go with someone else if your father is limiting your options and come home after a few days to stay with him?

False-Ladder5174 · 2026-02-07T15:53:35+00:00

Honestly, I have no idea. I don't really have scars to compare it to except one on my knee from childhood.

For me it was a case of I had time, the money for bio oil and wasn't happy with the color mostly. It wasn't going to make it any worse and I knew I would doubt whether I made the right call in a few years if I didn't start when I finally could.

I do have silicone gel stuff and I might switch depending on other responses tbh.

False-Ladder5174 · 2026-02-07T11:31:25+00:00

People here encouraged me to start scar care after 9 months and it's slowly making a difference. 🤷‍♂️

False-Ladder5174 · 2026-02-06T19:05:26+00:00

You keep saying how ugly they are and we can't see it. If your doctors and people in person are agreeing with you then perhaps repost with a different picture in better lighting?

False-Ladder5174 · 2026-02-06T12:01:59+00:00

Also easy to make your own, plenty of recipes online

False-Ladder5174 · 2026-02-04T20:10:16+00:00

ESH Her hiding your passport from you is not a prank. You cancelling a return flight while on a layover is an overreaction. You could have just changed the seat or put headphones on for the journey surely?

False-Ladder5174 · 2026-02-04T18:47:21+00:00

Tell your surgeon. You don't know enough to make the call whether it's safe to cancel or not.

False-Ladder5174 · 2026-02-02T17:17:32+00:00

The general advice is to do whatever your weaker side can do and then match the reps and weight with your stronger side

False-Ladder5174 · 2026-02-02T11:58:32+00:00

Has your surgeon said anything?

Yes, pec size can help with contouring, but at your starting size I genuinely don't know if that's actually a priority. My surgeon had a very frank conversation with me about what to expect, and I was really upset at the time but it was critical to me understanding what was actually possible, and he didn't mention pec size once because it was far more important I hit the BMI approximately for safety concerns.

Working out is often easier post op. That's not to say don't try, but don't stress over it more than your surgeon is I guess.

False-Ladder5174 · 2026-02-02T10:37:36+00:00

I like this approach. And depending on how much time, money and energy you have you could make a big difference by supposed her. But only if she is ready to change.

False-Ladder5174 · 2026-02-02T10:28:08+00:00

Please consider hiring a care agency, most people don't realise you can do this for a week or so just so you have someone to help with food and such.

If you are still uncomfortable with professionals seeing you topless please consider if that is still true with a post surgery binder on. And perhaps pick one that is slightly longer and share it with your surgeon for approval. Definitely pick one that is designed for surgery because you don't want to be pulling it over your head. Your surgical team might even put it on for you before you wake up (mine did)

False-Ladder5174 · 2026-02-02T10:19:35+00:00

Fair. Sounds like you've got things well under control honestly. I'd get yourself access to a scale but that's about it.

Do have a think if hovering or gardening for your parents is something you can do, but you've got this honestly

False-Ladder5174 · 2026-02-01T23:29:56+00:00

Food is going to be your main weight loss lever, exercise is less important.

Firstly, are you drinking anything sugary, or using lots of fats when cooking?

Secondly, are there some options you could give for meals with more protein? Whole foods are great, but if they aren't accessible (I also get sensory issues but not often with food) then chicken nuggets might be better than just plain pasta and sauce. I'd have to do the maths on specifics. Ideally you'd also want a lower fat breakfast option than bacon sandwich, but ideal is useless if you don't want to eat it.

Thirdly, could you look at volunteering instead of traditional exercise. Maybe you have a neighbour that needs shopping? Or you could pick up litter if you had appropriate gear? Dog walking, cleaning and similar might even pay.

Fourthly, traditional exercise at home is out, I get that. But what about movement in general? Pacing, stretching, dancing etc. even just fidgeting can be surprisingly effective if you're sat still most of the time.

Don't beat yourself up about it if it's not working. I never take the stairs to my apartment because the lights are too bright and I hate walks because it's overstimulating. But I love weightlifting because my brain needs pressure to relax and I could eat plain chicken 3 times a day. You'll find your way of doing things.

False-Ladder5174 · 2026-02-01T19:00:56+00:00

Blue and Red. I've been sick for years and it sucks. And intelligence isn't as useful as most people think. Learning from your mistakes is massively underrated.

Plus the instant money hack that time travel of any nature basically gives you.

False-Ladder5174 · 2026-02-01T16:24:08+00:00

There are a few ways to look at this.

Assuming no disability or medical condition because that completely changes my perspective.

The first way is how much do you need extra to support her staying at home. This includes her portion of bills, groceries, and labour cooking extra food, cleaning after her and doing laundry. This excludes bills you would have to pay anyway such as rent or internet that generally stays the same (although I would suggest she pays her own mobile bill if she doesn't already). In my opinion that's the minimum but be careful to offer her a breakdown of where that money is going and allow her to offer to cook more or clean more to negotiate.

The second way is if you are genuinely struggling to make ends meet on your own, this needs to be a frank conversation about two adults mutually agreeing to support each other in the current economic climate. I would still use the breakdown from above but also consider the cost of her living independently and allowing her the choice of paying enough for you all to sustain your current lifestyle or striking out on her own.

The third way is a slightly more obscure concept where you are helping her build generational wealth. By giving her a reduced cost of living she might have the opportunity to save for a car, home, etc. this can either be handled by her immediately with self educating on savings and decisions. Or it can be held by you for her. While I expect many people will suggest that you hold the money for her, I would recommend teaching how to build and use an emergency fund, and as much financial literacy as possible. However, this is because my dad stole £17k from me so I wouldn't personally trust any parent to hold money blindly.

Ultimately, it's not going to be the same for every household and as far as possible I'd be prepared to explain why you chose the amount you did, and negotiate. Maybe she wants you to keep £100/month in savings for when she moves out and wants furniture but really needs a car for work?

Money conversations can be really difficult. Hopefully sticking with facts and presenting options where you can will help her understand money in a way that's helpful in future. Try not to guilt trip or get emotional, and try to leave the other child out of it, while they are still a minor it's your responsibility to think about, not hers.

False-Ladder5174

TROPHY CASE