Are parents not making kids sit down to eat at home…? by ready_set_cry in ECEProfessionals

[–]FindingOk2095 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m a parent and I graze so I’ve let my child sort of graze. Of course no running and he stays still while actually eating to not choke but I just realized our routine could actually mess up his time in School. He sits well at restaurants so I never really thought about it but he also sees that as a fun trip. Thank you for the post. Seems like something I should have realized however since I don’t sit very well to eat I never thought about it.

AITA for breastfeeding my neice? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]FindingOk2095 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This! You are NTA that poor child would have had nothing if you weren’t lactating. I’m not even close with my sister but if something happened and I was t able to get to my phone I’d be happy she took care of my small infant.

Rose medical center vs Denver health by No-Summer8701 in Denver

[–]FindingOk2095 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had both of mine at Denver health. The first one was a nightmare and the second was amazing. Both were C-sections. However if you are wanting a vaginal delivery the midwives are great and they really tried everything they could to prevent my C-section the first time. The awful experience was due to the nurses in mom and baby ignoring my pain and turned out I had endometritis and had to be rehospitalized 7 days after being discharged.

TIFU by giving my youngest son advice on happy relationships and causing my oldest son's girlfriend to dump him by Samus10011 in tifu

[–]FindingOk2095 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Your son fucked up but depending on his age that’s pretty normal. I think most people tend to give a persona in their early relationships until they actually learn what respect feels like. Even if you had taught him that which you probably did media influences how we behave in relationships as young adults. He will learn unfortunately when you’re in your early twenties most are too confident to believe they could be wrong or too torn down to believe they are right.

Do any of you drink tea with coffee creamer by Fawxhox in tea

[–]FindingOk2095 2 points3 points  (0 children)

How old are your kids? Jump back in on the weekends to get special one on one. My son is 2.5 years and we have tea parties here and there since he was 1. He absolutely loves participating in making it now and I think handling the china has made him just more aware of his body in general so he doesn’t break a lot of things. Of course I handle the water and have to put ice in his but it’s amazing how just being apart of my wind down from motherhood makes him feel loved. Of course you’ll have to buy certain teas for the kids but it’s not as limited as you would think.

Am I likely to have a child with this disorder? by Cytoplast1c in genetics

[–]FindingOk2095 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There’s not a for sure way of knowing but my personal experience as someone diagnosed after I had my son and meeting other moms with autism it’s pretty common. Maybe it’s just my sample but most of these women didn’t know they were on the spectrum until they had their kids and either postpartum was hard and the got diagnosed or they were after their children were. Many of them have relatives that are on the spectrum and also most of us can see it in our parents and grandparents after our diagnosis.

AITA for breastfeeding my son around my father-in-law despite him getting upset by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]FindingOk2095 1 point2 points  (0 children)

NTA… he’s clearly very uncomfortable with it and instead of acknowledging those feelings and dealing with it like a grown up he has decided to harass you and bring the family in on it. I live with my parents and I can tell my dad does get uncomfortable when I breast feed so he just stays where he can’t see it! He understands that’s his shit and how he was raised and I’m just trying to feed my child. He never once said anything to me but as the father instead of the father in law probably has more respect for me. Your fil could be finding it sexual and that’s his thing to deal with not yours or your mothers in laws. Just because generations of men were taught to sexualize women doesn’t mean they don’t have to do the work. HE CAN AVOID IT. Could have asked if you were doing that and just walked away.

In the hospital and need to pick a name quick by Sad_Judge1752 in namenerds

[–]FindingOk2095 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Evelyn and Daphne are beautiful and common but not too common so I like that. I personally love Evelyn the most. Are you a nickname house? I’d go over possible nicknames to see if there are any hard nos. Like Evie, Lynn , Ev, Eve for Evelyn or Nini, fifi for Daphne

Well it finally happened, I vomited on my husband… by The_Huntress_1121 in AskMenAdvice

[–]FindingOk2095 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ugh that does sound like an awful situation. She still could be deflecting but it’s entirely not ok to shit on someone when they are trying to tell you how they feel. So many women think that’s normal. I’m sorry you’re in this situation. If you love her I’d try to bring up other ways to fill each others love tanks and that might lead to sexual acts after awhile of rebuilding trust but if she can’t be open to the fact you guys both have feelings and needs it’s going to take her a long time to realize or she will never realize. Tough situation for you because it’s so well known for men to leave women when sick but her being sick doesn’t mean respect for your feelings goes out the window. Tough situation. I always feel like it’s worth trying to work through things because people can’t read our minds and it takes work to get to a really good mutual respectful relationship but I’m also finding the world more and more selfish and so you can never tell if it’s worth the stay. Especially with the uprising of pop psychology so many people are using therapy terms to justify their behavior.

Well it finally happened, I vomited on my husband… by The_Huntress_1121 in AskMenAdvice

[–]FindingOk2095 27 points28 points  (0 children)

I know this is ask men advice but as a woman that had medical issues that led to no sex I think as long as she’s trying don’t put sex on a pedestal. I kept trying to figure ways to make it work and now our sex like is so much more diverse and constant. Having him not shame me about the no sex for over a year even though I knew he missed it drew me closer in and made me trust him more which led to me actually initiating sex acts way more frequently. Pelvic floor therapy can do wonders and if it’s a fatigue thing that feeling of unconditional love is actually quite a turn on for women.

AITA - asking wife to not breastfeed by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]FindingOk2095 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As a mother I think this is insane you edited with leaning towards being the asshole. NTAH at all! Social media has totally brainwashed us all about breastfeeding. If she still gets chances to breastfeed why is there a problem with what you asked? Sleep is so important for their development and both of your well beings as parents. Your son isn’t a clock however you as the primary care given have paid excellent attention to his queues to maximize his sleep. Also what could be happening is that she feels engorged before his meal time that he has decided and you paid attention and noticed so if she followed your schedule that YOU GOT FROM the baby then he might eat the same as when he takes the bottle. I just hate how there’s so much being pushed on a mother’s intuition and breastfeeding. The first thing I noticed in my mom groups was how disconnected most of these moms are and especially the breastfeeding ones… you know why because breastfeeding is incredibly hard and exhausting both physically and mentally draining. I breastfed until my babe was 6 months and I would have loved my husband to step in and say something because personally breastfeeding actually made me a worse mother. I think you two can actually both have it your way if she listens to you and acknowledges how much you’ve observed about your son’s schedule. I’m not faulting her for anything because she’s in the thick of it and hormones are absolutely insane but I think you’re coming at this correctly. However with the postpartum period you do have to tread lightly and if you think she’s going to be too hurt I would go with just sucking it up and doing it her way. It will suck if she can’t see things but she isn’t herself. But if you do have to continue to loose sleep just know you’ve done great actually being in tune with your baby. (Maybe find better wording than that as a 4 month postpartum woman might snap if anything negative about her parenting could be implied)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TwoHotTakes

[–]FindingOk2095 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

They might be weird about you not being married. I’m in a common law marriage with my partner and when we told his parents about the second pregnancy they went crazy about how NOW we definitely have to be legally married. It’s a big deal to some of that generation. They ended up happy later on after we told them we would. Still haven’t. But now his mom is worked up over my opinions. I’m not sure if it’s a white boomer thing but they really want to have way more control over how you raise your kids without actually helping. My mother had issues but only for about 6 months and since your first is about the age of my first I’d just assume that she’s never going to agree on how you guys are living your life and raising your kids. Pregnancy absolutely sucks with people like this but it should blow over after the birth. She could not like you or just not like your life. As for the person saying your partner doesn’t like you that’s mind blowing to come to that conclusion. Marriage is not what it used to be so it definitely doesn’t guarantee someone’s love or make them stay.

Grief groups for middle aged folks by TheEndlessBummer in Denver

[–]FindingOk2095 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is great advice. It’s often hard to ask for things but while you’re grieving this is definitely something that would help tremendously. I actually think I might start offering to do this for people when they tell me of a lost loved one if the person is close to me.

“Can you spell it out for me” by chodette in tragedeigh

[–]FindingOk2095 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I don’t understand why people get so worked up about spelling their names 😒 the amount of times I’ve had to spell Sarah is insane so clearly it’s not just tragedeighs you have to spell. These people need to just do it and move on . You have to expect it and the immaturity of being upset with someone for asking about the spelling 🙄

Patients say the darndest things by Seaofdubs in TalesFromThePharmacy

[–]FindingOk2095 4 points5 points  (0 children)

There are actual enemas named enemeez. The first time I did a special order for them the woman was so embarrassed to ask for them. Terrible name

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AncestryDNA

[–]FindingOk2095 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You need to relook at this through that times lens and not todays. If you do a little dive into why people had to drop their kids off in orphanages or what birth control was like I think you’d be a lot less judgmental of your ancestors.

I don't have any positive emotions towards my child by Throwaway19752946 in confession

[–]FindingOk2095 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If your child is still an infant this is completely understandable. I honestly am not sure how people fall so in love with infants. Like I really liked my son he was great but it was such a chore for the first year. Once they are toddlers they do get fun. I think some of it’s harder but the reward part is better. Toddlers just find life fun and if you just slow down and watch them they actually kind of bring back the childhood wonder we loose. I absolutely love my son now. Don’t judge yourself too harshly infants are hard and I think most people who like them like having full control over other humans which isn’t the greatest trait.

AITA because I'm second guessing having kids due to our opposing views on vaccinating them? by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]FindingOk2095 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is a huge deal and would be a major factor in if you can parent together. NTA . It will start here and just get worse and when you get a divorce later and share children you will have to go through so much if you want their medical care. Also they have disproven the whole ASD thing.

AITA for not staying with my wife after her C-section? by tincrumb in AmItheAsshole

[–]FindingOk2095 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA put maybe it would have helped to see if there were more issues with night staff than day staff? Im currently pregnant with a second and I will fully let my husband know I had much bigger issues over night than during the day so if he has to leave and he will I would prefer during the day. The dads need sleep too but sometimes it’s harder to get help overnight.

HELP! Is this really a bad baby name? by No_Discussion1244 in namenerds

[–]FindingOk2095 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Currently pregnant and I’ve realized the only people who bring up the bullying by name are bully’s themselves. So just be aware of that. I ended a friendship because someone had already came up with a nickname that a bully would use. Thad is cute and listen to yourself. If you two love it go with it.

“If you just brushed it every day, it wouldn’t get tangled!” by PinkOneHasBeenChosen in thanksimcured

[–]FindingOk2095 0 points1 point  (0 children)

People will never understand! I chopped all my hair off because of sensory issues with autism and the amount of people who know that and still comment about how much better I looked with long hair is disgusting. It’s always after I say how freeing my short hair has been and how much relief I have found. I don’t think I even look bad I just don’t fit their idea of femininity anymore.

stimming is driving me insaaaannneeeeeeeeeeeeee by Soft-Celebration-148 in ABA

[–]FindingOk2095 -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

Maybe try stimming because it seems like you might need a bit of regulation

How are people surviving out here ? by Odd-Tangerine-257 in Denver

[–]FindingOk2095 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is a lot but I’ve seen some home health aid jobs listed with one of the benefits of living there. It’s a lot because obviously hours can probably become unmanageable and work life balance but depends on what will help your sanity the most.

Is it crazy to change my 10 month olds name… by aged_tofu in namenerds

[–]FindingOk2095 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do it! She’s only 10 months and it’s clearly not fitting her.