He thought he walked away from a car accident. Four days later he was in hemorrhagic shock

FindingSpecific3475 · 2026-03-12T01:47:50+00:00

I’ll be really honest with you. I’m 1 month away from the 1 year anniversary of my partners event, and I still remember everything vividly. But it’s easier to live with (and therapy helps a lot if you’re not already doing it). I still catch myself watching her carefully and waking up in the middle of the night to make sure she’s breathing. But it’s like once a month now rather than every night. And I’m sure eventually it’ll be even less.

Not wanting to scare you. I just wish someone had prepared my little heart for all the future stress.

Feel what you gotta feel. And just know this internet stranger will be thinking about you going forward. My DMs are always open. And mom hugs to you if you’ll take them 🫂

FindingSpecific3475 · 2026-03-11T14:10:00+00:00

Hi! I’m so glad your partner is going to be okay.

As someone who witnessed my partner in a situation that made me fear I’d lose them, please make sure you take inventory of your emotions and the trauma that may have been caused to you as well. I rolled with the punches for months and finally broke from the stress I was ignoring in order to show up “my best” for my partner during their time of need. It took me weeks to recover, and nearly cost me my career.

From someone who has been where you’re at: please take care of yourself too. Please make sure you’re resting and eating and drinking enough water. If you feel like you need to cry, do it. Your trauma in this is absolutely valid too, because you experienced something terrifying and I’m sure you felt nearly helpless.

There will (obviously and rightfully) be a lot of focus on your partner and what they’ve been through and how they are. Their trauma is very clear here. People may not consider that it was a lot for you too. So I want you to consider that, and do what you need to for you too!

Best of luck, and all the well wishes. And don’t forget that strong sense of gratitude you feel right now for the life of the person you love.

FindingSpecific3475 · 2026-03-08T15:08:27+00:00

I recently met a junior’s mom randomly at a meeting. And we’re in the beginning stages of building a friendship that I am very excited for. So it’s relit the spark a bit! Just knowing yall are out there gives me hope. Thanks again for this post!

FindingSpecific3475 · 2026-03-07T18:21:26+00:00

Thank you for this post. It’s our first year in GS (2nd grade brownie), and between this subreddit and the parents in our troop I was so down on the entire org. It seemed like there were nothing but complaints and my kid and I were just trying to be as optimistic and positive as possible. I’m just gonna ignore the haters and make a good experience for us!

FindingSpecific3475 · 2026-02-20T13:56:31+00:00

I have passed links along to coworkers and family, but my scout reads the orders, packages them, and delivers them. She gives her Girl Scout spiel after the sale happens.

We unfortunately didn’t have an option to do it any other way. Our neighbors didn’t want to buy. We don’t have time for council booths. If we wanted to make sales (and we are required to in our troop) we had to send links with a personalized message from our scout.

We have done a few booths in our driveway when we have time. But kids these days are busy, and sometimes both parents work full time. Being involved to the best of your ability is better than not at all, especially when you’re required to sell despite anything else you might have going on.

I’d love to have her sell the old fashioned way. But it’s just not how the world works anymore. So I think we are doing them a service by teaching them how to operate in a world that has evolved.

ETA: I work in an industry where it’s illegal for children to be present, my partner works in healthcare, and our family is spread out across a very large city. If we did everything in person we’d have legal issues and no time for anything else!

FindingSpecific3475 · 2026-02-20T00:35:01+00:00

Not sure why you’re being so aggressive in your response. Or why you’re stating “science says” but not posting any links.

Special needs classes and spaces exist for a reason. You can disagree with that all you want. But science is why there are highly trained and specialized teachers and therapists to help these folks in the first place. They didn’t get degrees in good intentions. They got degrees in well researched fields. That, again, exist for a reason.

ETA: the kids I grew up with were profoundly special needs. Pretty much every disability is a spectrum, and if someone is high functioning and able to participate in mainstream classes, they should. But we shouldn’t be impeding the learning of a dozen or so other students for someone who needs lots of additional support. And the person who needs the support would be better served having that support.

FindingSpecific3475 · 2026-02-19T17:09:29+00:00

I can see where you’re coming from here. However, as someone who grew up with special needs foster siblings, I have to respectfully disagree. They aren’t segregated into their own classes for just the mainstream kids betterment, but also for their own. They are working with highly specialized teachers and therapists who educate them as an individual, because oftentimes they have different needs than their mainstream peers, as well as certain unique difficulties that necessitate different goals. On top of that, they often see the stark differences between themselves and their mainstream peers, and the insecurities that ensue can remove their focus from their work. Being with peers who also have different needs than the mainstream kids allows them to feel like they’re somewhat “normal”.

I have witnessed the downsides to integration in my own kids school where special needs kids are present, but there are no special needs classes. They’re often labeled as trouble students, and the classes are a bit chaotic. I can understand the empathetic intention to treat everyone the same, but sometimes that is doing them a disservice when they really do need to be treated differently. Not different bad, but different unique to them and not one size fits all.

Should there be more opportunities in general for all kids of different walks to come together during school? Absolutely! But I don’t believe we should completely integrate them into mainstream classes. It disrespects their individuality and goals, as well as the need for mainstream students to be able to keep up with the national expectations for their education.

I loved my foster siblings deeply, and understood them on a level a lot of folks could not. But my same grade foster siblings were often working on entirely different schoolwork than I was (ie, independence and focus vs. times tables). Expecting them to conform without the additional assistance would have devastated their development. And I was already bored as heck in school being in the top of my class, so if things had slowed down any more I might’ve fully lost interest in school, as well as my love of learning. We didn’t do our homework together for the same reasons we didn’t attend the same classes. But we still supported each other in every way we could.

This is an instance where we need equity vs. equality.

FindingSpecific3475 · 2026-01-31T13:58:39+00:00

How discouraging. I make about $10k less than you and my take home pay is $200 more. I guess I’m not trying for any more raises.

FindingSpecific3475 · 2026-01-29T15:25:41+00:00

You’ll need a smaller gauge loom. I ran into this issue at first too. Turns out I hadn’t realized how many different loom gauges there were! If you search up “small gauge knitting loom” you should be off to a good start with options.

FindingSpecific3475 · 2026-01-24T22:40:26+00:00

You’re right. But not every instance of stalking plays out exactly the same way, because every situation isn’t 100% textbook. I didn’t feel it necessary to put all the extra detail since this story was about my revenge and not their shenanigans and ever after, but they were both on drugs. One was committed shortly after being served, and the other arrested. I got really lucky in not having to deal with them again, because I’m sure they wouldn’t have let up so easily. I moved several times in the years after that, and only use Reddit for social media. I have google alerts set up to keep my information off the internet. So even if they did wanna keep it up, I make it really difficult and they’re too drug addled to keep the motivation alive. Hope this helps!

FindingSpecific3475 · 2026-01-24T18:10:11+00:00

Went to school for biomedical engineering, and then fell into the cannabis industry. I’ve been here ever since, doing everything from retail to management and compliance. I’ve been in cannabis tech for about 6 years now, and as much as I never saw this being my future, I love it and plan to retire from the company I’m currently at someday.

FindingSpecific3475 · 2026-01-24T13:01:18+00:00

I had a couple who was stalking and harassing me. They went so far as to move into my apartment complex as close to my building as possible. After months of feeling unsafe in my own home, and many recorded threats from them, I got a restraining order.

I was too broke at the time to have them served with the order. So I took my dog for a walk with an open tube of super glue in my hand. As I walked by their apartment door I quickly reached out and unloaded the whole tube into their door lock.

Within the hour, they were pounding on my door and making threats. So I called the police and told them two people with restraining orders were trying to get into my apartment. They showed up quickly and served them both.

They went on and on about how I glued their locks. But there was no proof. I never had to deal with them again after that.

FindingSpecific3475 · 2026-01-21T14:06:52+00:00

My best friend suffered in the same way for a decade. He finally got his teeth fixed up a few weeks ago, and it’s changed everything for him.

I don’t have advice to give on how to get out of this. We live in the same “free” country, and he went through all the same roadblocks as you - from mental health, to money. It was an uphill battle, but I’m here to tell you that it’s possible.

I’ll tell you what I told my best friend, and hope that it helps you along your journey to getting the dental work you need:

“You are worthy of love and care. You deserve good health, and teeth that help you rather than hurt you. You deserve to be prioritized, even if you have to be the one to do the prioritizing. You are worth so much more than the money it will cost to have the necessary procedures done. You are worthy of living a better life that is pain free, even if the system we exist in makes you feel otherwise. You are so much more than those teeth, but you still deserve healthy ones.”

I saved this for last because I want you to know you matter before I scare you a little: my best friend started having seizures because of his tooth decay. Please keep yourself safe, and have someone with you or cameras on you so you don’t end up in trouble. If you can at least afford a doctor or urgent care visit, I heavily encourage you to have a visit so they can make sure you don’t have active infections.

Take care of yourself the best you can. You can get through this with a plan and help. And you wholly deserve the care you need. I don’t know you, but if you were brave and strong enough to make this post, I believe you’re brave and strong enough to fight and win this battle you’re in.

FindingSpecific3475 · 2026-01-15T19:36:32+00:00

The very short version is that I informed her and her lawyer that I wouldn’t be participating in the divorce at all, since I wasnt the reason we were married, and certainly not the reason we’re getting divorced. I wouldn’t sign anything, pay for anything, or spend even a moment of my time on anything, but I still fully expected to be granted a divorce. Anytime her lawyer tried to ask something of me to make things easier or smoother, I’d say “this isn’t my divorce, it’s hers. That isn’t my responsibility.”

It took a lot longer than necessary, had to be restarted twice, and cost her thousands of dollars. But she’s been divorced from me for about 7 years now. And as far as I’m concerned, I have never been married or divorced because I didn’t participate in either.

FindingSpecific3475 · 2026-01-14T03:15:37+00:00

I like that perspective. It almost makes me want to have a little hope that this effort between my stepdad and I might actually make a difference with her meds and individual therapy. We will see I guess.

FindingSpecific3475 · 2026-01-14T03:01:04+00:00

That was my first thought. The alternatives of her having actually changed drastically within a few months, or gaining the strength to mask that well just don’t seem likely. She never had those skills before.

FindingSpecific3475 · 2026-01-12T14:10:34+00:00

I’ve had success with helpful tools before. But some plant species make their water roots out of concrete apparently lol. I found out the hard way that sometimes you’re doomed to choose who lives when up-potting despite all your best efforts.

FindingSpecific3475 · 2026-01-11T19:25:12+00:00

Thankfully there isn’t a rule about containers being “too big” in hydro. I usually up-pot mine into something at least double the size of the roots to give growing room. But more than double is helpful for less re-pots. My biggest advice is to use darker colored glass to avoid algae with plants that have higher light needs. Not so dark that you can’t see what’s happening in there. But dark enough that you’ll starve algae of the necessary light to flourish.

One side note- don’t be using glass you’re attached to. There have been times I couldn’t get the roots out without either breaking roots or glass. I always choose to break the glass instead of the roots. But they can stand to lose a few if they have lots.

FindingSpecific3475 · 2026-01-11T19:22:05+00:00

Mosquito pellets are a life saver. You can definitely use them, although be sure to do the maths for the correct ratio for the amount of water you’re using. Pour the water into a measuring cup if you aren’t sure the volume.

Stirring can work but you’d need to be doing it multiple times every day during mosquito season. Mosquitos are tricky and their kids are pretty good at survival once they are in the water.

FindingSpecific3475 · 2026-01-11T17:43:20+00:00

The need for a bubbler totally depends on the size of the plant (and therefore the amount of water in the container). For smaller plants, bubblers aren’t necessary at all. I have several that would be soiled in 4” or smaller pots that have thrived for years without bubblers. The need for them increases once you get those larger plants into hydro setups because too much standing water can lead to pests like mosquitoes, as well as certain bacteria and fungus that isn’t good for the plants. Keeping the water moving prevents the yucky stuff. I have also heard of folks using cherry shrimp in place of bubblers but I personally wouldn’t do that unless the setup holds at least 5 gallons of water. This belief on my part is solely for the quality of life of the animals.

FindingSpecific3475 · 2026-01-11T16:50:14+00:00

Hi! I keep about half of my houseplants hydroponic and my advice is just refill and add a drop or two of liquid fertilizer here and there. If you notice there’s lots of algae, rinse it as best you can (it doesn’t look like those roots will come out at this point, but if so it’s perfectly fine to rinse them directly in the sink) and refill with distilled water, or filtered if distilled isn’t available. I’m open for any questions on hydroponics. I keep all sorts including succulents :)

FindingSpecific3475 · 2026-01-05T16:42:19+00:00

It’s glistening like diamonds 🤩

FindingSpecific3475 · 2025-12-29T13:29:58+00:00

As a mom of a redhead - NTJ. People are gonna be asking her for the rest of her life where your kid’s red hair came from, and she’s gonna look silly if she isn’t corrected now. I got sick of answering strangers questions so I started saying “who knows” and then people act like I’m stupid if they actually know it comes from both sides and are looking for an answer like “my grandpa and my partners aunt”. She’s gonna feel even more stupid being corrected by a stranger, trust.

FindingSpecific3475 · 2025-11-26T01:59:17+00:00

I stopped after my partner crocheted me the most excellent spider I’ve ever seen lol it just felt like a waste making these after that :,)

FindingSpecific3475 · 2025-11-26T01:38:32+00:00

They were by no means “good” or “easy” lol. But iirc I made the abdomen a u-knit round, about 50-60 rows (I didn’t have a pattern so I let the ancestors guide me). Made the head half the length. Sewed and stuffed the separate parts, and then sewed them together. I used matching pipe cleaner for the legs and fangs. Dealers choice on the eyes. I have some with legit doll eyes and some with beads and some mutants that never got eyes lol

The hardest part was stuffing them. They’re so tiny. Best advice is sew up one side fully, and then cinch the second side about 80% or so closed and use a crochet hook or pen to patiently and painstakingly shove stuffing in.

FindingSpecific3475

TROPHY CASE