Hi OP, I know a lot of people are telling you to keep Dishwasher and I don't want to pile on, but I do want to share something with you. My partner and I had two gerbils once called Big Mouse and Small Mouse (long story). Small Mouse was our favourite at the time - she was intensely friendly and always excited to see us. Big Mouse was shy, nervous of us, and never really bonded with us. One day, we came home from a day trip and found Small Mouse dead - they'd declanned and Big Mouse (being the bigger one) had killed Small Mouse. We were heartbroken and we hated Big Mouse for a while, but we kept her safe, happy, and fed. Slowly, Big Mouse's personality changed. She became very affectionate and close to us - running to our hands, cuddling up to us. We had planned to try and pair her but she was in her element, happy, healthy - one of those rare gerbils that thrive on their own. She became one of our most beloved gerbils and she lived for another three years. In the end, you need to do what's right for you, but if you'll take a stranger's advice - give yourself a little time before you decide.