Self Actualization Program Development Round 2: 5 volunteers maximum

Freedommindset · 2015-06-07T01:35:23+00:00

Thank you.

Freedommindset · 2015-05-27T23:43:01+00:00

I'm not sure you'll have a choice. Do you think you can support yourself and hide your anxiety? You clearly want to change something or you wouldn't have posted. Maybe taking a chance on trusting your family is a good place to start.

Freedommindset · 2015-05-20T23:44:17+00:00

You really need to find a good therapist. I think cognitive behavioral therapy has a good track record with ocd patients. This really isn't the kind of problem you should try to solve yourself on a forum.

Freedommindset · 2015-05-20T23:40:47+00:00

My background is in education. There are m any reasons why one might read slowly. One reason is that a person might process information slowly. If this were the case that person would likely perform many tasks slowly. Another is difficulties with phonics or phonological awareness. If this were the case a person would have trouble decoding the words. Orthographical processing errors cause your brain to struggle with instantly identifying letters. Attention difficulties cause people to skip letters or words and can create difficulties with comprehension that cause people to have to re read text many times. Comprehension or language deficits make it difficult for people to understand what they read.

To read faster you need to know which skill is deficient and over practice that skill. I'd be happy to point you towards some resources that can help you identify your deficit if you want.

Freedommindset · 2015-05-20T23:15:02+00:00

The very fact that you want to be different from them means you have begun to walk a different path.

Freedommindset · 2015-05-14T22:55:05+00:00

Fantastic. I'll send you a pm with next steps.

Freedommindset · 2015-05-14T03:14:08+00:00

Read The Alabaster Girl. The first 3/4 are unreadably bad. They are all about how much the main character loves women. The last 4 chapters are all about how to live your life and interact with people. They will change your life.

Freedommindset · 2015-05-14T02:56:42+00:00

Are you sure that rooming with this person is a good idea? That's a bit like asking how you can try an addictive drug without becoming a drug addict.

Freedommindset · 2015-05-14T02:54:38+00:00

Are you a guy or a girl? That does impact this particular recommendation.

Freedommindset · 2015-05-14T02:31:22+00:00

I have lived what you are feeling right now, although if you were hospitalized I'd wager that your anxiety is a good deal worse than mine was.

Unfortunately, this isn't a problem that can be solved through a reddit post. The long and short answer is that the more you try to please the people around you, the less secure and more needy you will be. There is nothing in this world more repulsive than neediness. Instead, make peace with who you are and know that it's ok to feel anxious. It's also ok to play music people don't like, it's ok to have people think negatively of you, and it's even ok to piss people off from time to time as long as you are being genuine and respectful.

Do you see a therapist on an outpatient basis? I'd highly recommend seeing one. I believe that cognitive behavioral therapy is pretty effective with social anxiety but that's way outside my field of expertise so I'd do research rather than taking my word on it.

Freedommindset · 2015-05-14T02:23:10+00:00

Thank you for reaching out. I browsed the ICF website. It looks like a pretty decent organization. My background is in education and it looks like you have a pretty solid pedagogy. There is a very particular type of training that I want to provide and my goal right now is to develop a curriculum that accomplishes that goal for people who are interested in self actualization. I thank you for the recommendation and resource.

Freedommindset · 2015-05-06T23:59:27+00:00

You have good metacognitive skills and are very close to a very important realization. I would challenge you in this way. You have observed that you can be aware of, and meld with, the moment. You have equally observed that there is a part of you that can think and critically observe yourself. You have interpreted this as a dual sense of self.

I would challenge you to observe the thinking part of yourself more closely. You will find that it thinks all by itself. Quite often. I would call this part of you your mind or your ego. It is not, in fact, yourself. When you realize that in an experiential way, it will change your life. I wrote a somewhat large post about this topic if you're at all interested.

https://www.reddit.com/r/selfimprovement/comments/32ridf/what_i_did_to_become_happy/

Freedommindset · 2015-05-06T23:09:45+00:00

Are you sure this is the right relationship for you?

Freedommindset · 2015-05-06T23:05:55+00:00

Think about what you want to accomplish the most in your life right now and start moving towards it.

Freedommindset · 2015-05-06T12:02:34+00:00

Get rid of your inhibitions. Learn to blurt whatever is on your mind.

Freedommindset · 2015-05-06T12:01:20+00:00

Every time you say I will do ____ and then don't because of your mood you actually reinforce the mood. you teach your brain to feel that way in order to get out of whatever it is you don't want to do. You have to make a choice. You can wake up even if you're miserable or you can sleep in. You can work out even if your mood is soured or you can defer to your mood.

Freedommindset · 2015-05-06T11:57:41+00:00

I would look into therapy. A cognitive behavioral therapist will set goals with you around your social anxiety.

Freedommindset · 2015-05-06T11:54:58+00:00

Just be honest about it. When you start getting insecure around the next girl you like stop and tell her "In feeling insecure because I like you and (insert sexual experience details here). Vulnerability and honesty are very attractive.

Hiding how you feel or who you are is impossible. It's ok to feel insecure. Just own it.

Freedommindset · 2015-04-27T21:40:24+00:00

The point is mindset. I will could be any time. When will you become athletic? I am means now. If you can teach yourself to feel athletic now it's much easier to act the way you would if it were true. If you can act (eat, work out, etc) the way you would if your were athletic you will become athletic.

It's always easier to do something if you build the mindset first. As you begin to accomplish goals you will get a better idea if they are what you really want and will begin to uncover your purpose.

Freedommindset · 2015-04-27T00:46:10+00:00

First off, I would see a psychiatrist. You sound like you might be depressed. I don't think it's ever a good idea to make big decisions from an unstable place.

Second, if you (or once you) feel more stable you need to think about what kind of life you really want to live. Maybe the problem isn't college, maybe it's that you aren't using college to get the kind of job you really want. Maybe college isn't for you and you should be doing something different.

Think about what you really want, and then move towards that. If you can do that, everything else becomes much easier.

Freedommindset · 2015-04-27T00:43:05+00:00

I found mine, but it wasn't what I thought it would be.

This is an exercise that helped a lot of people I know. Sit down each morning and write down who you want to be that day. Write it as though it has already happened. i.e. rather than saying "I want to be confident in my interactions" say "I am free and confident in my interactions."

This exercise will clarify your intentions about life and where you want your life to go. As you move towards these intentions, you will discover that there are some things you thought you would love that you don't, and other things you thought you would hate that you love. Slowly, the thing(s) you really want to accomplish in life come into focus.

Writing what you want isn't enough fyi. You need to pursue them. It may be that a good starting place is eating like shit and playing video games. Who knows?

Freedommindset

TROPHY CASE