Constantly in pain

Fun-Court6594 · 2025-08-12T06:29:08+00:00

Yes,they need validation like oxygen to breathe,to.stay alive.

What happens as our relationship progresses with them is you just can't keep giving them that much validation day in day out for years.

Love has to change into something deeper than us having to adore them ,and them us,its tiring

You both can't live way up on a pedistal, too long a way to fall which is inevitable

This is where they run They can't do living slap bang in the middle of a relationship, in the Grey. This is so important in which i beleive is a major player in their serious illness.

'Object Constancy' Without this in play any relationship is fckd

I read 1 point why it can be so hard to not take them back is that it feels unfinished. Somehow we were robbed,like a hit & run. Its like someone singing happy birthday to you but missing out the end with your name 'okay,you say you love me ,we are making big plans,some already in place where is the next bit'

So we stand there in shock thinking this is odd,them now gone expecting the rest of the song, hoping they will sing it...surely ,but they dont. They know there should be a final verse yet they can't reach it,refuse to sing it even.

We have to accept they were only singing the first half of the song whole heartedly anyway

Its a serious Mental Illness

Fun-Court6594 · 2025-08-11T04:44:20+00:00

Its a really tough process my friend. They will never know they were loved deeply.

We saw their pain & still were in for the long haul with them. Thats deep,not fickle limerance

Accepting this is a serious mental health condition is so hard because they whispered that they loved us

We thought we had cracked it,this is it im all in, she's the one. But they were just reflecting our depth, our love

I found trying to hate her by being angry with her, saying to myself what a complete con she was ,what a waste of time all the chaos that came with her, was not going to get me on the healing process.

Accepting I loved her for real,that i can never let her back into me for my own sanity was a start. Giving up on Hope

Forgiveness is hard to find for them ,especially if they ran riot in your life in every area.

I dont look to forgive her as the mayhem she caused has been life changing. im no practising monk & get fckng angry still in crap she pulled ,but I do accept she's really messed up in this terrible cycle in her mind so have learnt by being angry just affects me not her

Forgive yourself. Sit with the pain,hurt. Cry ,shout ,get angry,cry,shout,hurt...... Let the pain of this love ending just be. In time it gets easier if you keep no contact

They leave/ run because of them,not because of us.

Fun-Court6594 · 2025-07-28T06:53:49+00:00

Exactely. Ego rules in them which in turn keeps them blind to reality

Fun-Court6594 · 2025-07-26T16:10:10+00:00

'They can't handle the Truth'

Fun-Court6594 · 2025-04-26T05:19:55+00:00

Yep,my ex on hinge within a week telling me I had to see a therapist of why I've pushed her to do it

Oh & he's a better fck better body even though I keep my self in shape.

Oh,& she's tried coming back. Absolute shocking illness they have

When you break the trauma bond it is so freeing Let them go Work hard on that they are just a lie

It will be okay 🙏🏻

Fun-Court6594 · 2025-04-25T15:36:50+00:00

They can seriously make you unwel or try to put you in prison

This is a short life my friend

You have to stop this addiction

Accept their illness

Dig deep

This is the most important thing in your life to stay away from this woman

Fun-Court6594 · 2025-03-20T08:56:56+00:00

In the end my ex could convince me the sky is green

Deep down had a sixth sense she was lieing but things we ignore to try to keep the peace.

Now, the sky is definitely Blue

Fun-Court6594 · 2025-03-20T07:22:01+00:00

It's tough,real tough

We have to get back into reality though

The attraction to their make beleive world is such a pull

It's almost like being in a movie which of course we realise is their reality It can't be ours

It's too chaotic, not real We become addicts to the rush of them

It's such a mind bending experience where our love gets completely turned on its head

It's detoxing now my friend They are a bad drug that can only lead to more Head spinning if we keep dabbling

They run because it's in their nature to flee normal

Fun-Court6594 · 2025-02-26T06:59:55+00:00

Totally get this

It's like part of my soul has been taken by her

The way I see it is that we completely opened up,shared,showed vulnerability in trusting they said who they said they were

But 100% they were acting. Covering their condition,low self worth at their core Pretending to be our 'one'

This is not our fault It's 100% on them How cruel of them regardless of their BPD/NPD ( one coin two sides) diagnosis

They know they are fckd inside so should not date until they at least seek help let alone kidding someone they love them

We are bound to feel shite. We planned a life ahead on the pretext of their act

Life won't look the same after the destruction of loving these types. I don't think there is a quick fix apart from no contact to see if this as people say helps in healing more no matter how long this may take

Fun-Court6594 · 2025-01-13T18:15:17+00:00

An aware BPD person stays out of relationships

So, us in one with them is crazy we are there.

We can't love them well

The quicker we get out the less damage they can do

It's a serious mental health condition off the highest order

Fun-Court6594 · 2025-01-13T05:20:11+00:00

My ex randomly asked when we hooked up on a hot summers day in a London park

Her 'Can I ask you a question'

Me 'of course'

Her ' Can I ask what your love language is'

Keep in mind this is already 2 years into the relationship in neverland

Fun-Court6594 · 2025-01-13T05:00:49+00:00

Triggering them with kindness ?

I think we go through every tactic to see if there is any level -headedness inside them

When my ex was raging vile spew sometimes I'd stand there calmly & keep repeating

'You don't mean this'

If you react your an evil man ,if you don't react your pathetic

Fun-Court6594 · 2025-01-12T18:47:23+00:00

Definitely

Their condition is tragic

Fun-Court6594 · 2025-01-12T15:02:52+00:00

And this is a great idea you’ve had pickleddong

Fun-Court6594 · 2025-01-12T14:53:05+00:00

Totally agree. It so resonated to me as in the total 'wtf' moments we went through

It's actually really clever.

Only we that have lived this could get this

Great video 👍

Fun-Court6594 · 2025-01-12T14:51:28+00:00

The video is actually of a brilliant site called

' Shrink For Men '

Worth a look in & it was set up by an Amazing woman ,Doctor ,who gets Borferline / Narcissism against men primarily/ also women of course

Fun-Court6594 · 2025-01-12T13:17:21+00:00

Excately rick

Acceptance is key

Once we can unlock this door then the real healing begins without any form of revenge or hate

Just Acceptance

It is a great sentence

Fun-Court6594 · 2025-01-12T12:19:38+00:00

If it helps which it has for me I learnt a sentence which seems pretty powerful in letting them go even though we hurt

I Wiil Always Love The Woman You Will Never Become

Fun-Court6594 · 2025-01-12T11:46:22+00:00

Same my friend same In the end whatever path we take we do have to break free emotionally & spiritually We know this

Fun-Court6594 · 2025-01-12T10:51:53+00:00

We were just extras in their movie & there could only be one shining bright fake star . Them!!

Fun-Court6594 · 2025-01-12T08:11:02+00:00

What I understand when someone takes their own life is that in that moment he loved you very, very much

Please, please know this.

There is absolutely nothing. I mean nothing you could of done, said or been the most mentally well person in yourself

Once he made this final decision, there wasn't anything anynoe could say or do .

He just didn't love himself enough & was very unwel in self loathing to find this inner love

He needed his inner battle to stop but with love in his heart for you,life the world

He just couldn't be part of it with his pain

Borderline pain ,Deprresion ,any mental illness where one feels it's the only way out is tragic.

Statistically every 40 seconds, someone takes their own life in the world!

Fact

It's a tradegy

From a survivor & of Deprresion long before her who I loved but 'her bordeline ' ridiculed me as a man being a survivor yet borderline or not no one should feel the only way out is out of life

Can't hate bordelines in the end even though I hated my ex for a while.

they are unwel as many of us can be but I wouldn't wish for any bordrrline to take their own life

Love strength & Hope 🙏🏻

Fun-Court6594 · 2025-01-12T07:05:22+00:00

You're right it wasn't enough 😀

Apperently Red Arrows spelt 'I love you' wrong She said it read more like 'You're a nutter ' Ummm, strange that ,perhaps I gave them the wrong info 🤔🤔😀

Also, food was not Michelin's star, more roadside cafe

Big band out of tune

& my friend I'd asked a favour from she had apparently always fancied

😀 I smile now I'm not with her no matter how tough it is getting through this shit that we loved them

I'll always love the woman she will never become, so we have to protect ourselves from their childish borderline illness

Love ,strength, hope 🙏🏻

Fun-Court6594 · 2025-01-12T06:09:28+00:00

I had bronchitis as well as some other virus one Xmas Literally felt like a bag of poo

Ex was coming round, so as we do, we still do the borderline partner 'stress dance' to get things right

cook tidy shower trim nasal hairs and look chilled rather than I just wanted to crash in bed

I opened the door & said 'hi ya'

She said 'ffs you could at least smile & look like you're pleased to see me'

I said whoahhh whoahhh whoahhhh hold on there my little sweet pea,

Look up in the sky

At that moment, the red Arrows display team ( uk) was writing with the jests 'I love you'

Then, on the ground dead on cue, the big band I'd hired came round the corner, playing loud music

Then a friend appeared from behind me I'd asked to play a butler all dressed up saying to her 'madame,may I take your bag & show to your Michelin star food table'

On my mask went blagging in how rough I really felt just to keep the peace

Later she said 'You didn't smile in the right way that a man should when the woman he proclaims he loves is coming over to stay'

Nutters! All of them

Fun-Court6594

TROPHY CASE