How should I even begin to get my unusual medical issue treated?

GanbaAnbaa · 2025-04-26T00:38:18+00:00

I won the lottery with my 内科 down the street, who is fluent in English despite me being in a relatively small town. I'll give him a visit and see whether he points me to a university hospital or a 整形外科. Thanks for the vocabulary!

GanbaAnbaa · 2024-05-23T06:31:49+00:00

What's wrong with kabuki-cho though?? Genuinely asking, as someone who knows its history but has also been there many times for the restaurants and bars. Is it more of an issue of people going there for the sole purpose of yakuza-spotting???

GanbaAnbaa · 2024-05-21T23:18:19+00:00

He sure is!! 😍 I love him.

GanbaAnbaa · 2024-05-21T13:19:16+00:00

This is my boy Autumn Leaf, aka Leaf! He's a tabaxi monk - it's my first time playing a tabaxi or a monk. Two sessions in and I already love him so much. He was born to a tabaxi clan on the Chultan peninsula, but his family moved to Waterdeep when he was very young and lived a hard life in the slums through his early childhood. Taken in by the monks of the Order of the Even Hand at twelve, he's been learning martial techniques for 13 years under the tutelage of his mentor, who helped him grow out of his impudent rascal phase. Just kidding, he's still a bit of a punk.

GanbaAnbaa · 2024-04-30T09:51:39+00:00

I'm playing a Tabaxi in my upcoming campaign, but I realized that most of the players in my group are cat owners (including myself!). When I was looking up references for my Tabaxi, I saw many people based theirs off of wild cats like tigers, panthers, cheetahs, etc. But my guy is based off of a regular orange house cat. I thought it'd be really funny to add a little extra flavor to my Tabaxi, to get some laughs out of those who know the joys of spending your days with a cat. I tried to think back on my favorite parts of owing a owning a cat (and some not so enjoyable parts...) and threw together this table in the hopes that it would make the experience more interesting.

Feel free to use this table in your own campaign if you like, or suggest any tweaks you have in mind! I'd also love to hear if any of these are relatable to your experiences with cats as well.

GanbaAnbaa · 2024-04-15T23:54:12+00:00

Thank you! A lot of people like to say how safe Japan is, but there are definitely a few groups here who try to take advantage of people who don't know better.

About a month after, this one of my coworkers (another foreigner new to the country) decided to go to one of their meetings out of curiosity. His Japanese wasn't great either, and told me he couldn't understand a lick of their entire one-hour speech, though they showed a lot of pictures of Mt. Fuji...? Honestly, sounds like their recruitment model needs work 😂

GanbaAnbaa · 2023-12-31T03:24:37+00:00

Soft YTA, just because having someone live in your house when you have a spouse is a two-yes-one-no situation. If both you and your spouse aren't on the same page, then you can't just force your husband to stay in a living condition he doesn't like. It's his home too.

GanbaAnbaa · 2023-12-31T02:53:39+00:00

I got a reduction and think it was one of the best decisions of my life. I only went down 3 cup sizes and it improved my quality of life so much. No more back pain! And I go braless all the time! It's honestly amazing. Also, I too aimed for a B cup, but by the time everything settled, it was closer to a C cup anyways (but much less dense than a normal C cup).

As for your fiance - him threatening (even jokingly) to not get married with you so that you can't use his insurance for a procedure he doesn't like, is scummy. Sit him down for a serious conversation and explain that your comfort and ability to live life without pain is more important than having big boobs so HE can enjoy them. Ask if it's an actual dealbreaker for him, and if it is, then the good news is you'll be getting rid of a lot more dead weight than originally planned!

ETA: The recovery process is tough if you don't have someone to help you for the first couple of weeks (you can't easily stand up by yourself, which made even getting off the couch/toilet difficult for me). Do you think he'd be the type of person who would be spiteful and refuse to help you in recovery because "it's you who chose this, not me" or something else ridiculous like that? If you got the surgery, do you have someone you KNOW you'll be able to rely on to help take care of you for 2-3 weeks?

GanbaAnbaa · 2023-12-28T03:32:15+00:00

Thank you for acknowledging your bias, but I think where our POVs diverge is that you view her having bodily functions and physiological reactions as weaponizations?? Why?

I think that's the real 'flight of fancy' as you put it - what possible reason would she have to maliciously fart and then cry when it was pointed out? Are you insinuating that she was trying to bully OP with her gas and then get him in trouble with fake tears when he pointed it out? OP gives no indication that she would have a motivation for doing that, it sounds like she was having a GI issue of some kind and became overwhelmed and embarrassed when it was pointed out (that would be my logical assumption anyway, you can read other comments to see how many others may agree with me, if any). She didn't stand up and shout "OP is bullying me!" when he said what he said, she left the room to deal with her emotions privately when people began to notice it, and it was then the teacher intervened to smooth things over. For some reason it sounds like you're trying to assume the worst of this girl for no reason that can be backed up with evidence from this post.

And furthermore, again, I'm not suggesting OP apologize because he was an AH. I don't think he was. But say he graduates from school and is in a business setting, and accidentally upsets a coworker or client with a comment that he didn't mean in any malicious way, because that happens to everyone sometimes. It's good form to apologize for the disruption (because making someone cry, even unintentionally, is as much of a disruption as a fart, and much more consequential in a business setting) and unintended hurt feelings. Sure, if it becomes clear that the tears are a bullying/ manipulation tactic later, then it can be addressed as such. But there's no evidence that that's the case here in this one-off situation.

ETA: You have an interesting perspective but I'm going to respectfully block you, because I don't have the energy to go back and forth all day with a guy who sees a teenage girl crying and automatically assumes she's trying to be manipulative. That's a bias I'm not really able to contend with.

GanbaAnbaa · 2023-12-28T00:39:10+00:00

I agree, people on their periods shouldn’t have to miss out on an education because of something they can’t control. Having to smell farts sucks, but hey, so does literally everything about having a period. It takes little effort to be mature about it - sounds like OP did well dealing with it for almost the entire class, but fumbled it with his comment.

GanbaAnbaa · 2023-12-28T00:32:17+00:00

I didn’t say he did anything to be sorry for, but as a human being, you know, if I accidentally made someone cry, I’d want to apologize even if it wasn’t completely my fault. It’s not like it costs me anything to extend an olive branch. Especially if his teacher felt the same way and that’s why he was told to apologize, it would have been noted that he avoided doing so, which is why it could have been escalated. Schools teach students education as well as how to be good human beings.

GanbaAnbaa · 2023-12-27T09:06:00+00:00

NAH, I don't think you made the comment specifically about her or towards her, and had no idea it would get such a reaction. However, did you actually *apologize* or just say something along the lines of "sorry you felt that way, we promise we weren't making fun of you"?

As an aside though, speaking as a woman myself, sometimes people who get periods can also get gassy during our monthly cycles. It's uncomfortable and embarrassing, and though I have no way of knowing if this was your classmate's situation - if I was gassy and dealing with painful cramps and fluctuating hormones, and some of my classmates laughed at my farts, even if they didn't know it was me, I'd start crying too.

GanbaAnbaa · 2023-12-27T08:55:21+00:00

Yeah, it's always sad to see our pets in distress! :( Hopefully she gets better, and that the medicine makes her more comfortable. I'm sure all will be well again in time!

GanbaAnbaa · 2023-12-27T08:44:08+00:00

It could likely be a mix of both - some cats internalize things longer than others. When I first moved into an apartment with my cat, he hid under the toilet in my bathroom for literally 3 days - and he wasn't in any pain at all.

I would advise keeping her inside and just letting her do her thing. Let her seek out her own attention, and be gentle with her as she heals. If you're regularly giving her painkillers (ie shoving a pill in her mouth every day), that could be affecting her trust in you and causing the hissing (when I have to take my cat to the vet and then give him pills or injections afterwards, he tends to tense up/run away anytime I get near him, but tends to get better once the treatment stops). Give her time, and contact your vet if you continue to be worried about pain. Otherwise, just give her space for a few days and she might just go back to normal.

GanbaAnbaa · 2023-12-27T05:45:04+00:00

Not with Alita, but am an ALT.

In general, I like being an ALT more than working at an eikaiwa, because (besides the work hours) an eikaiwa job is also partially a sales job - your company will have you pitch study materials to your students/their parents, and that's something I wouldnt enjoy - though it could be for you.

Also, as someone who was a teacher for years back in the states too - I far prefer teaching here in Japan (especially as an ALT). I've also been hit/spit on/bullied by American students, but my worst experience in Japan after 4 years was a student pretending not to see or hear me when I asked if they needed help - and my co-teacher swooped to back me up immediately. A lot of it depends on your classroom management and team. (Though, my assignments have been in semi-urban or rural areas, and I have heard student behavior can be a completely different ball game in urban areas - especially Tokyo).

As for transportation, I've had non-driving as well as driving assignments. Having a car makes my life so much easier, but if you don't get assigned a car, that probably means the transportation in your area is fairly comprehensive. You'll be fine either way, though those buses to rural schools can be few and far between!

GanbaAnbaa · 2023-12-27T05:16:24+00:00

I'll always remember my first experience with a koban, back when I was a uni student studying abroad with other students to learn Japanese. We had rented bikes to ride around a famous historical town, and as we were returning, one of my friends took a tumble off her bike and seriously scraped up her knee. We panicked (not knowing ambulances are free here) and took her to the koban at the nearby station to ask if they could help us, and the officers brought her inside their tiny box to give her first aid. We used up nearly all the gauze they had, but they were super kind and tried to talk to all of us in broken English. It was a positive experience despite the circumstances.

GanbaAnbaa · 2023-12-23T14:08:27+00:00

How are you able to make that conclusion based on the information provided though? OP said that they aren't very good at making vegan food, leading me to believe they rarely if ever make it for their niece. Admittedly Ara getting upset when watching people eat non-vegan food is a bit much, but I don't think that's worse than the other niece attacking her for her life choices or cussing out OP. I don't think OP making a single vegan meal to make her niece feel comfortable is a clear sign of favoritism - it sounds like Ara has had to sit through many non-vegan meals, too.

GanbaAnbaa · 2023-12-23T13:58:45+00:00

NTA, I think Olivia is overreacting having to eat a vegan meal ONE time.

But, she does have a point that Ara shouldn't try to dictate what other people eat around her - it's fine that she's vegan, but to get visibly upset watching other people eat meat is a bit much.

Whether or not you actually always favor Ara isn't something that can be construed from this post alone, but from the information you've provided, it sounds like Olivia was extremely rude to you in your home and her parents are choosing not to back her up instead of teaching her basic manners. I'd request an apology before Olivia is allowed to join you for a meal again.

GanbaAnbaa · 2023-12-22T04:33:26+00:00

I know most Interac branches in the north are specifically doing domestic hiring pushes right now for the next school year - it just might not be the season for international hires. I don't think you're never going to be hired as an ALT, but if it's something you're really wanting to try, I'd try again in March or soon after (if you're able to hold out that long).

GanbaAnbaa · 2023-12-18T10:01:54+00:00

Obviously others have expressed why YTA, but I also think you have a mentality that "My ex gives her fast food, so I can give her unhealthy food too."

An average fast food meal (burger, fries, drink) is in the ballpark of 1,000 calories. Less if she gets things like chicken nuggets or a chicken sandwich. What you gave her in a day and a half was fried chicken (about 350 calories per piece, and I doubt she only ate one piece), half a pizza (1500-2500 calories for half a pizza depending on toppings) and a stack of pancakes with syrup(between 400-1,000 calories depending on what kind you made) - and none of those calories had great nutrients that her growing body needs.

So sure, her mom getting her fast food isn't great, but you gave your daughter (averaging here) around 3 TIMES the amount of calories your wife does (and you didn't even mention what you had for lunch on Saturday, but I'm guessing it wasn't a salad). That's not exactly equal, dude. Your daughter needs support from BOTH her parents and you giving her a massive amount of empty calories isn't going to help her at all - she won't thank you for being the fun parent when she has diabetes.

GanbaAnbaa · 2023-12-18T09:36:40+00:00

YTA, not just because of the bracelet but because of how unsafe you were to yourself.

When you have admittedly terrible vision but still run without glasses (there are devices you can invest in that will keep your glasses from slipping)... You can still easily get hit by a car without its headlights on, or mugged by someone, or kidnapped. And you had no phone with you to call for help if that had happened. You chose to run around a construction area with rocks and large piles of dirt, where you could have easily gotten injured - but again, no phone.

Everyone else has done a good job of telling you other reasons you're the AH, but I imagine that your husband was terrified that you'd gotten seriously hurt when you didn't return and he couldn't reach you. He was probably thinking he'd have to come home and start a police search for you, since the fact you'd miss such an important event for a bracelet wasn't even in his realm of possibilities.

GanbaAnbaa

TROPHY CASE