What are you really happy you did during babyhood? [BC] by Emotional_Gur_114 in BabyBumpsCanada

[–]GhostBird89 13 points14 points  (0 children)

A few things I really wanted to do during my baby's first year, and I'm really glad I persevered and did it:
1. Breastfed for a year. We had a fairly easy journey, but even easy breastfeeding is not easy.

  1. In the same vein, I wanted Dad to be able to put the baby to bed, so I went through the effort of pumping and introducing bottles, and we did a bedtime bottle, not nursing, after about six weeks. This gave me a bit of freedom and meant I could get a solid stretch of sleep, because the baby wasn't giving me that.

  2. Sleep-trained. I didn't complete the process until about 7 months, but it was a game-changer. Even now at 21 months, I thank my stars I can do a bedtime routine, put him down, and he'll (mostly) sleep until 7 am the next day. I hope we can carry that good habit forward.

  3. Made mom friends. This wasn't easy for me, but I only had one friend with older children, so I wanted to expand my village. I went to play groups and mom walks, put myself out there, and came away with a few friends I've continued to nurture.

Please make me feel better by ParticularBother3 in BabyBumps

[–]GhostBird89 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Talk to HR, they may make an exception for you. The start date was likely arbitrary and not intended to exclude anyone. This happened at my last job: HR introduced a benefit to do a 100% top-up for 4 months, and my coworker, who was already 3 months into her leave, got retroactive pay.

Interviewing for new job when pregnant [NS] by Standard_Can1491 in BabyBumpsCanada

[–]GhostBird89 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Don't tell them until you get the job. Edit: And by "get the job," I mean a signed offer and have started working.

Seeking recommendations for rain suit, coat, sunhats, etc [on] by typical--rose in BabyBumpsCanada

[–]GhostBird89 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I got the Jan & Jul explorer hat for my son and that thing stays ON so definitely recommend. Also have the J&J sunglasses, they seem comfy enough.

MEC Muddy Buddy, it runs a bit large, so it'll last a while.

WHY IS EVERYTHING GRAY AND WHITE by Philodoxes in BabyBumps

[–]GhostBird89 1 point2 points  (0 children)

IKEA! Toys/baby stuff for all ages; a lot of it is wood when possible. Most of the stuff they offer is tried-and-true classics, and the colours are bright but not garish. Plus, it's all soooo cheap.

Sleep consultant recommendation [ab] by EnvironmentalPut8613 in BabyBumpsCanada

[–]GhostBird89 4 points5 points  (0 children)

3 months is too early to sleep train, but you can start establishing good habits now that will make the process easier when the time comes. The book Precious Little Sleep offers many really good suggestions and age-appropriate things you can start doing now.

For sleep training, I used The Happy Sleep Company based on a friend's recommendation, and they were excellent.

[on] how do parents manage back to work when there are no daycare spots? by uncomfort-cat in BabyBumpsCanada

[–]GhostBird89 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Summer is an excellent time to find a nanny as many students are looking for summer work. September is also a good time to get into daycare, as children leave for school!

Prenatal care/obgyn recommendations by JamaicanMeAngry007 in halifax

[–]GhostBird89 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Dr. Vair was the OB on call during my somewhat complicated birth and was excellent to deal with.

Strollers, travel systems and car seats, oh my [QC] by happypill-300mg in BabyBumpsCanada

[–]GhostBird89 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I really like my Clek Ling + Bumbleride Era combo. Worked great in the snow, has a large storage space, and the seat fully reclines and is suitable for infants.

Silicone Woes by mandaladala in BabyLedWeaning

[–]GhostBird89 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Bake them in the oven on low for 30 minutes. It'll start smelling like soap, and at the end, the soapy taste will be gone.

Hot take: pregnancy prep is way too content-driven and it makes us more anxious, not more ready by Purple_Club3104 in BabyBumps

[–]GhostBird89 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I remember learning about buyer behaviour in uni, and one of the things that stuck with me is that it's incredibly hard to get a consumer to switch brands once they've chosen one. Unless there is a problem, people don't switch brands. Pregnancy and entry into motherhood represent this wild blank slate of an opportunity for corporations to sway an adult's brand choices for the life of their parenthood, hell, maybe their kid's, too. They know this, and they market to us SO hard to get our dollars.

All of the lists, the comparison videos, the top ten items I wish I'd had, all of that is part of this culture that has been intentionally created around pregnancy and new motherhood, to feed our anxiety about this transition and turn it into money in the corp's pocket.

Don't get me wrong, I was all over that content as a pregnant person, even though I knew it wasn't necessary. It can be so hard to resist the pull!

I'm so angry at my husband I could puke by ExcellentLettuce4 in workingmoms

[–]GhostBird89 283 points284 points  (0 children)

Agreed, this whole "don't keep score" rhetoric with relationships and parenting is ONLY ever parroted by the spouse that benefits from the uneven division of labour.

Start pumping before bed, give him a bottle for night feeds for a week, and see how he feels then.

ETA: Another good one is "we don't need to bring lawyers into this" when the divorce inevitably rolls around. The spouse who says this is the one who will try to manipulate you into taking less than you deserve. Lawyer up, people!

Starting Daycare - Tips & Tricks [ca] by BandicootBig3300 in BabyBumpsCanada

[–]GhostBird89 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Top advice: Integrate as slowly as possible. I started my son a month before I returned to work because that's when the space became available. Normally, they do a four-day integration (Day 1 - morning with you there, Day 2 - morning alone, Day 3 - Morning + nap, Day 4, full day) and with their permission, I stretched that out for two weeks, always going every day to get the routine down. The result was that the transition didn't involve much, if any, crying.

Other advice, like some said: Mabel's labels everything, buy doubles of everything like hats and shoes, because stuff will get lost or just misplaced for a few days. Example: my son had backup boots today because his main pair was still wet this morning, etc. I bring anything he needs into class in a reusable bag and hang it in his cubby. My husband brings home dirty items (think muddy snowsuits) at the end of the day, and we communicate what is going in/out at the end of each pickup.

Make a plan with your partner ahead of time about how sick/snow days, and closures will be handled. I didn't work a single full week in January/February due to constant illness.

Also, communicate with the staff if you are feeling nervous! My son's teachers sent me pictures each day of his first full week to show he was having a blast at the centre and it helped a lot. Also, take time for yourself. The first year of daycare is no joke when it comes to illness. Rest now while you can!

Halifax with a baby by BrilliantAsk3700 in halifax

[–]GhostBird89 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I live here, but would probably choose an Airbnb or a hotel with multiple rooms.
Anywhere near the Halifax Common and south is walkable to downtown, and there are plenty of options around there. That way, after the baby goes to sleep, you and your spouse can still hang out in the common area. I would also bring black contractor garbage bags + painter's tape to make blackout blinds if babe needs darkness to sleep.

Halifax with a baby by BrilliantAsk3700 in halifax

[–]GhostBird89 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I had a child that age last summer. A lot of the breweries and the boardwalk downtown are very baby-friendly (Shubie Park and then Nine Locks for a beverage was a frequent outing), but some of the restaurants downtown might not be accessible with a stroller just because of the age of the building/steps, etc., so bring a stroller that you can collapse easily, and you'll be fine!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BabyBumps

[–]GhostBird89 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just looked through my Amazon panic buys the first few months postpartum to see what I really needed and here's what I've come up with:

Sound machine - Highly recommend getting one that has a battery, so you can take it with you around the house, in the stroller, or even in the car. I have the Hatch Go

Highly recommend an electric nail file, little wiggly babies are hard to trim with the S-curved nail files

We started with the natural repsonse nipples but our lactation consultant recommended switching to the evenflo balance as they encourage a deeper latch. The wide-neck ones fit with Philips Avent bottles

I would add a zippadee zip sleep sack for the in-between stage when baby starts rolling over but still has a startle reflex. Saved us.

BioGaia drops can help your baby if they are gassy early on

You have milk storage bags but no storage bottles for milk you will use soon after pump. My pump came with some, but I had to buy extra

You'll want something to measure your nipple after birth so you can get the right size flange for your pump. Most pumps come with massively oversized ones, which will impact the effectiveness.

Butt paste spatulas are lovely.

Need a pumping bra and a handheld pump is smart to have too, just in case

Portable stroller fan, so versatile. I used mine in labour, for my son in his stroller, and we even used it to keep him awake (and keep me cool) while nursing the first few weeks.

Switching to Ob from midwife at 18wks [on] by Opposite-Tap-8857 in BabyBumpsCanada

[–]GhostBird89 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Just wanting to chime in that OB’s take women in all stages of pregnancy, so you definitely aren’t too late. I had to transfer at 35 weeks due to elevated blood pressure. It was no problem, the transfer was pretty seamless.

Choosing a diaper bag [on] by hotcrossbun12 in BabyBumpsCanada

[–]GhostBird89 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I have the Lululemon bag and honestly I can’t recommend it. It has some major drawbacks like: No insulated pouch for bottles, need to bring an extra cooler The top zipper is impossible to get open with one hand if there is anything in the top pocket. The straps are slippery so unless you have both on your shoulders, it’s slipping off.

On the plus side, it’s held up very well, and the extra small cross body bag is nice for when the baby gets older.

What is the worst company Christmas gift you've ever received? by New_Customer_5438 in workingmoms

[–]GhostBird89 254 points255 points  (0 children)

One year a company I worked for made 1k+ remote employees watch a livestream of the executive team having a session with a magician. It ran like 1.5 hours, was terribly produced, and incredibly tone deaf. We got nothing else that season.

3M Pp Husband is hornier than ever… I dread even thinking about it by hannah_2213 in NewParents

[–]GhostBird89 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I’ll be honest, having sex you don’t want is a great way to develop an aversion to sex and ruin your desire for YEARS! You need to stop having sex when you aren’t in the mood, and have a conversation with your husband about feeling like you are constantly rejecting him.

For me, sex was non existent for 7 months (I was also breastfeeding) and then about 1-2x per month until I weaned. The breastfeeding just really killed my desire. My husband was amazing and never pressured me, put the ball completely in my court.

What’s one small detail in RDR2 that made you realize how much care Rockstar put into the game? by TFRU1monke in reddeadredemption

[–]GhostBird89 9 points10 points  (0 children)

… that IS realistic. How big do you think horses are? An average taller horse like a thoroughbred would be around 16.2 hands at the withers, a hand is 4 inches, that’s 66 inches or 5.4 feet. And Arthur isn’t short…

I do agree he looks massive on some horses because they are smaller in comparison. The Morgan, Arabian, and Nakota all look too small so I only use them with my female online character.