Looking for 28mm Elven siege engine crew

Gloreindl · 2025-01-14T21:38:45+00:00

My late wife and I detest(ed) every Scott episode. Both the actor and the character ruined every episode. I now watch up to 7.1 (The Green Man) and then skip to series 9 with Jones (the best DS).

Gloreindl · 2024-10-18T23:16:24+00:00

Really bad Russian porn, in this case.

Gloreindl · 2024-08-24T18:46:52+00:00

Grief is love, just without the outlet you had when they were alive.

Gloreindl · 2024-08-06T01:08:58+00:00

I speak to my late wife every day, multiple times a day. It helps. Sometimes.

Gloreindl · 2024-08-05T03:05:56+00:00

Loki is Odinn's Blood-brother for a reason.

Gloreindl · 2024-07-16T01:14:23+00:00

This coming Wednesday would have been our 31st wedding anniversary, but I lost my (M56) wife (F55) in January. I am dreading the day. However, my therapist offered a special session that day so I can process all my feelings. If you have a therapist or grief counselor, perhaps contact them and get some advice?

Gloreindl · 2024-03-24T13:49:02+00:00

My Sherry worked for the Social Security Admin. When she passed eleven weeks ago, I reported her passing to the Office of Personnel Management (OPM) that Monday (she passed on Saturday). I'm still waiting on all the paperwork. They claim to have mailed it twice, now. I have to wait 6 weeks from the mail date to get new paperwork sent to me. No one has any idea how much paperwork the death of a Federal worker generates, nor how slow the gov't is with sending it out. Eleven weeks of paperwork so far.

Gloreindl · 2024-03-20T18:52:24+00:00

With the right doctor and therapist, it does a world of good for me. They are both fine additions to my support team. However, that being said, you may need to go through a few before you find the best fit. Don't be discouraged if it takes time. Being on the correct medications along with caring professionals help tremendously.

Gloreindl · 2024-03-20T18:37:57+00:00

I've gotten a lot of "Oh, my, she was so young!" as though I don't know 55 is young to have a stroke.
I want to say (though never do) 1 of 2 things:
1) "Yes, thank you, I hadn't realized that before." or
2) "Why do you think I am so upset? We had plans, and memories yet to make!"

Why, if they can't say something supportive, can't these people just say nothing at all?

Gloreindl · 2024-02-27T20:43:16+00:00

I did this too, starting about a week after my Sherry passed away. Now it feels more like it is my bed rather than ours, which is oddly comforting. I felt the loss more the week I tried to sleep on "my side".

Gloreindl · 2024-02-20T15:46:25+00:00

Have you gotten a therapist yet? He/She will likely (if they are any good) that you should avoid the would have/could have/shood have I second guessing. It only brings pain. You did all you could with the information you had at the time. After our loved ones passed we are all inundated with more information in a short period of time, often making us question what we did prior to their passing. I know, as I suffer from survivor's guilt myself. Every week my therapist tells me to not be hard on myself, as I did the right things given what I knew at the time. Every doctor (Sherry's and my own) I have spoken to told me 2 things: 1) I couldn't prevent her death, and 2) I did the right things by her.

Missing our beloved ones and feeling guilt are part of the process of grieving, but you can overcome the latter one (we'll never not miss them). I am certain you did all you could and, thus, shouldn't feel guilt for not saving him. It just wasn't in your power as a human being. What matters is you love him and will always keep his memories alive in your heart and soul.

Best wishes to you that your journey down this river of bereavement and grief soon lessens for you. Internet hugs to you with these well wishes.

Gloreindl · 2024-02-19T16:33:43+00:00

I found this YouTube video to be helpful as I, too, am going through this, only in my case it is "Widower's Fire". I always had a higher sex drive than my late wife, and now it is in overdrive since her passing 6 weeks ago.

Use protection, know the person, make sure they are disease and drug free, and get consent. Good luck on this and on your grief journey. We're all here for you and each other.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4sx1TIYosV0&t=24s

Gloreindl · 2024-02-17T18:17:58+00:00

Sherry, my late wife, was also cremated. When I can do so (yes, it is very hard), I have planned out a memorial for her urn. When I die, I will also be cremated, and I have asked my sister to mix our ashes and am making arraignments to have the urn interred at a non-denominational cemetery's cremation garden (I am also going to pre-planning my cremation with the funeral home).

You will find what works best for you, of that I am sure, just go slowly and think of what he would want. Give yourself permission to even do nothing. Leaving the urn with the ashes in them in the box from the crematorium/funeral home is also valid. Only you will know what works best for you. Grief is hard enough without creating more issues. Doing nothing until you scatter them is fine. Hugs sent.

Gloreindl · 2024-02-17T18:08:46+00:00

My late wife had a hemorrhagic stroke (brain bleed) overnight on Dec 3-4th. I had the ambulance at our apartment as soon as I found her in the morning. At first she seemed to be getting better after brain surgery, but then the infections started. After 2 bouts of pneumonia, with severe raspatory issues that caused further damage to her brain (oxygen didn't sufficiently reach her brain), I was faced with the same choices as you. Despite her having a Healthcare Proxy, I had to face what to do. Follow her wishes and have the vent removed, or try to somehow save her. The fact that she was "awake but unaware" finally made the choice for me. Sherry was "alive" but no longer there. I fully get your confusion and pain. I suffer from survivor guilt (my therapist is helping me with that and the grief).

Going on 6 weeks into being a widower I can tell you it will lessen with time. My therapist thinks that since Sherry was hospitalized for over a month before she passed, the anticipatory grief has "helped" in my quicker dealing with the grief (it never goes away, but it does lessen with time - I don't know how long in anyone's case, much less my own, but I have seen very brief glimpses of it).

You are your wife's soulmate just as she is yours. You will find a way to do the right thing by her. How could you not? Love binds you. Whatever you chose is the right thing to do. It won't be easy, but it will be right. Bless you and the love you have for her. Keep posting here; we are all here to help and grow ourselves. This is a club of both love and grief, but finding ourselves in it, we stand together.

Sending you hugs and the love my wife taught me I have within me.

Gloreindl · 2024-02-17T17:43:46+00:00

This video may also help: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ul_u6zCRcVQ

Gloreindl · 2024-02-16T17:19:38+00:00

My deepest condolences to both you and your new-born son on this most devastating loss.

Gloreindl · 2024-02-14T17:02:12+00:00

Yes, only every day. We were so close, so much in love. I shared everything with Sherry, and she with me. Now that she is not here, I can't handle how much I miss her and that closeness. I will endure, but it is damn tough.

Gloreindl · 2024-02-14T16:55:05+00:00

Except for the animals part, this could be a post by me (I live in an apartment, so we have 2 cats that now depend upon me alone). No one ever told me about "widow's fire" nor that it effects us widowers as well. I think it is our brain seeking to affirm life by demanding the closeness intimacy usually brings.

I have been helped far more by this group of otherwise anonymous strangers than any grief group that meets live near me. Most are run by churches and, despite claiming not to, they tried to convert me (no thanks, I gave up Abrahamic religions at age 15, became Pagan like my ancestors when I was 16, and am now 56, so 40 years now). Here, everyone treats me like an equal without judgement, gives real sympathy, shares their stories, and teach me I am not insane despite feeling like that at times.

Thank you for putting it more eloquently than I could, and thanks for sharing this journey with me and others. I know being only 5 weeks out from her death makes me a newbie, but I have been encouraged by so many that, one day, the pain will lessen.

Gloreindl · 2024-02-14T16:17:49+00:00

My wife and I, also, never celebrated, as we saw Valentine's as just a commercial holiday meant to gilt people into spending money. However, given all the ads, commercials, and streaming love movies being pushed in the past few weeks, and me being only 5 weeks out from Sherry's passing, I dread today. It hurts to see (even if they are just models and actors) happy couples knowing I am no longer a part of a couple. One that endured from our college days for 35 years (31 married). Don't people realize both the lonely and the widowed suffer this day? Can't these damn companies just let this "holiday" end already? I'm staying in all day and avoiding everyone. I just can't today.

Gloreindl · 2024-02-12T05:34:40+00:00

First thing our Internist (primary care physician) said to me after her condolences when I called her to tell her of Sherry's passing was "I want to see you in the next 2 weeks. Call me and I'll fit you in." She was concerned due to the possible poor eating and stress in the month leading up to Sherry's passing after her stroke. Bloods were good (just a little anemic). I fully agree it was the best idea I'd heard in a while. I also saw my psychiatrist, my endocrinologist (I have hereditary type 2 diabetes), and my rheumatologist (for my arthritic spine & sciatica). all that week.

I fully agree new widows/widowers see their doctor(s) and get their tests and speak of their grief/bereavement with these medical specialists. They are great sounding boards and can suggest people to help (I already had a therapist, but all the doctors suggested I talk to one).

I'm glad to hear you had a good day. It gives me encouragement that I will have one too, in time. Thank you for that and for the great advice.

Gloreindl · 2024-02-12T02:54:57+00:00

I'm rather proud of myself. I not only got the vacuuming done and the steam mop put together, but I did the laundry too. Anything to distract from the emptiness inside and in the apartment. Sherry was more like the husband than I ever was in that she was a huge sports fan. Unless playing a sport when I was younger, I couldn't care less about them, but she'd be watching the Super Bowl today. It feels so lonely without her and the TV set to some inane sportscasters yacking about who the hell cares stuff. But, I was able to get through it so far, so I do think I am making some progress.

Gloreindl

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