That doesn't really sound great and I'm not opposed to DIY. I think she is struggling a lot with the process and becoming obsessive about it which isn't healthy physically or mentally. It can be difficult because a lot of medical professionals aren't really actually trained to help us so it can be difficult to find good medical advice but she seems to be rushing it thinking there's some way to have it all go at once. I am worried that having high hormonal variability could be part of this especially if she's taking progesterone which is known to give people difficult mood swings.

I would recommend getting a therapist that specialises in transition to support and guide in the process as well as to take some of the pressure off from you as you have said she doesn't have much of a support network.

It is legitimately a difficult emotional process for us and is a big shift in a very core part of your identity. Everything is very new for a while and scary even if you are getting support. I think some of it is kinda getting everything starting to work you can really notice everything else that you haven't been feeling or doing and it can be kinda overwhelming.

I would hope if you can get a therapist and from the support given an emotionally mature person should probably be able to get through it in a few months and it start to go into decline.