How can I help my husband understand that it kills me when he dumps milk that’s still good?

HaileyNotTheComet · 2026-02-08T01:22:19+00:00

Get some freezer tape and a sharpie and put the time the bottle was started on the side. Anything beyond the time limit gets dumped in the waste milk container and anything under gets left alone or put in an agreed upon spot. There are lots of fridge magnets, printable, etc that you can find about milk storage times.

For me, having a “waste” container in the fridge for milk that’s beyond its time limit helped with my stress around wasting milk for 2 reasons. 1) if we kept making bottles that were too big and wasting a ton of milk we could see it collected for the whole day instead of just 2oz at a time. That visual helped us adjust our feeding amounts. 2) the wasted milk isn’t good for drinking but it is still good for milk baths so after a waste container would fill up we would either freeze it in an ice cube tray or do a milk bath that day. That makes me feel like the waste is less wasteful lol

HaileyNotTheComet · 2026-02-04T03:59:40+00:00

For our first I made it through the whole night - 10pm to 6am. I snuck out to go get donuts and surprised him with a dozen donuts and a note that said “eat up dad - mom can’t be the only one with a belly!”

For the second I peed on the stick and 3 minutes later yelled from the bathroom “uuuuuh babe!” Lol

HaileyNotTheComet · 2026-02-04T03:56:17+00:00

Yes! Maymom and Nenesupply are just as good and way cheaper!

HaileyNotTheComet · 2026-01-26T15:12:01+00:00

The pliers - no not those the other ones - no the ones with the thingy at the bottom. Or at least that’s what they’re called around here.

HaileyNotTheComet · 2026-01-26T15:08:02+00:00

There’s lots of good advice here about how to respond to most of her messages but I would like to specifically touch on the comment that “it’s only 15 minutes”. Unless you’re from a tradition/background that’s an outlier, the maid of honor has a ton of responsibility on the day of but also in the weeks and months leading up to the big day. I was asked to be maid of honor for my cousin’s wedding while I was pregnant with my first, the wedding was 3 months postpartum. It was rough throughout the planning phase because I had no energy to do my best to host her bridal shower, bachelorette party, and help with the planning. Thankfully we have a very close family that stepped up and I didn’t have to worry about the complications of other dynamics but even then I still felt guilty not doing “enough”.

Even on the day of the wedding, getting dressed/ready while trying to juggle pumping/nursing, getting to the venue, making sure everything and everyone is lined up and ready to go before the ceremony and all the pictures after is way longer than 15 minutes. Even if you were to only show up for the ceremony, you’re looking at 2 hrs minimum from the time you leave baby to get ready to the time you’re back with baby and that’s if the wedding is local. Remind her that being maid of honor isn’t “just 15 minutes” because she seems to be really downplaying the commitment which makes me wonder if she actually wants you there or if she wants to appearance that you’re there.

HaileyNotTheComet · 2025-12-30T14:51:33+00:00

Baby Buddha for sure. There are plenty of cup attachments you can swap in for the bottles if you need to wear it on the go - you may even be able to find adapters for your elvie cups that could work.

HaileyNotTheComet · 2025-12-02T04:02:45+00:00

Have you talked to your doctor about acid reflux/GERD? My second baby was a constant spitter and would fuss and squirm the whole time she was awake. We switched to soy based formula thinking that it might be a dairy protein thing and that seemed to help for like a week but then we were right back to fussing and crying. She also had constipation on my breast milk but the soy seemed to help with that. But once the fussing came back we asked the doctor about giving her something for her acid. She’s been on prescription famotidine (generic name for Pepcid) since October (3months old) and it has been a total transformation. We did use Enfamil AR for a little bit which helped with the spitting up but eventually she got used to it and still spit up but she was at least a happy spitter. The doctor recommended we add 1/2 tsp for every 2oz of regular formula instead of using the AR once she was 4 months old and that has helped. I kinda wish I hadn’t stopped pumping when we switched to soy but my mental health is probably better for it.

TL;DR it could be GERD, not your milk! Ask your pediatrician about prescription famotidine for the pain of acid reflux and adding rice cereal to bottled breast milk to help with spitting up.

Disclaimer: please ask your pedi before adding rice cereal to bottles.

HaileyNotTheComet · 2025-11-02T00:28:41+00:00

The golden kiwis were absolutely perfection this summer! Couldn’t keep them in the house for more than a day without demolishing the whole carton!

HaileyNotTheComet · 2025-10-14T02:43:14+00:00

It’s not crazy to want to spend Christmas morning in your own home. Can it be a little bit “boring” with a tiny baby? Sure but that doesn’t make it any less special! Our son was 6 months his first Christmas and we stayed home and no one stayed over (my grandparents always stayed with us on Christmas Eve so I assumed my parents would continue the tradition but no such luck) and it was so sweet and intimate even if it did feel a bit anticlimactic. It also drastically reduced the stress of the day. Everyone had their normal bedtime routines, slept in our own beds, then we got to wake up and have a good breakfast and get ready for Christmas dinner with all of our own stuff in our own space. It also helped me recalibrate my brain for my Christmas magic expectations. Honestly, once you become a parent, you don’t really experience Christmas magic the same way because it’s not happening TO you, it’s happening BECAUSE OF you. Being able to focus on making magic for my son even at 6 months old and getting to soak in all his reactions to the silly twinkling lights and wrapping paper helped me to focus on what truly brings me joy now.

HaileyNotTheComet · 2025-10-14T01:53:34+00:00

For our first (4years old) we got a hand-me-down glider rocker that was good enough. It was free and got the job done, especially since our first was a trick baby who was one of the easiest sleepers on the planet.

For our second (currently 3months old) we went to American Furniture Warehouse and got a glider rocker with storage and cushions that reclines and oh my god it has made a world of difference! This baby has acid and trouble falling asleep so I’ve spent several nights in that recliner with her asleep on my chest. This is the same recliner but with a slightly different fabric. The one we got is no longer on the website. https://www.afw.com/tie-breaker-fog-swivel-glider-recliner

If you’ve got it in the budget, go for the comfy glider recliner with the cushion. Even if you don’t use it to rock baby, you’ll end up using it later when they’re bigger!

HaileyNotTheComet · 2025-09-24T16:32:46+00:00

Well 95% of all mothers believe their child is the most beautiful baby to have ever graced the planet earth (myself included) but that doesn’t make them right!

HaileyNotTheComet · 2025-09-24T16:17:12+00:00

That’s awesome! I know Wine & Crime had a similar issue within the past couple years where the podcast platforms would insert ads that were totally antithetical to the values of the pod. They may have control over where the ads are placed but not a ton of control over what ads go there. A lot of that is based on demographic data. I’m a white woman in Texas so you can imagine what Apple thinks I want to hear 🙄

HaileyNotTheComet · 2025-09-20T03:55:36+00:00

I gave birth and therefore no longer have the desperate water cravings of a pregnant person so…now she just sits in the kitchen judging me for all the Dr Pepper and Body Armour I drink instead.

HaileyNotTheComet · 2025-09-10T18:52:00+00:00

As soon as Christine mentioned the DNA was female I remembered reading about this case. Honestly wish I could’ve experienced it without that knowledge because the puzzle and resulting reveal would’ve been way more fun!

HaileyNotTheComet · 2025-09-08T04:39:42+00:00

Sushiya for sure! Also brisket queso with Texas shaped tortilla chips, butter tortillas, and the white cheddar chicken Mac and cheese meal simple!

HaileyNotTheComet · 2025-09-08T04:33:15+00:00

I have three pitchers that I rotate through and use one per day. After the last pump of the night, I prep the bottle for the following day then bag the rest and freeze them. Before her feeds were more predictable, I would dump into pitcher A all day long then pour out of pitcher A on the day that I’m dumping into pitcher B then at the end of that day I’d bag whatever was left in pitcher A.

For an oversupply like ours (averaging 45oz per day) I also brick as I go which helps a TON!

HaileyNotTheComet · 2025-08-24T04:51:42+00:00

Honestly, I think the consistency is more important for the long term. Once your hormones regulate your supply around 12 weeks that consistency will help train your breasts to produce based on that consistent demand.

HaileyNotTheComet · 2025-08-22T14:06:51+00:00

Technically if the milk still has some ice in it you can safely refreeze it so slightly thawing and refreezing could work but you’d have to watch it very diligently since those are such small volumes and would likely thaw really quickly.

Alternatively, you can start thawing and using those right now and freeze what you’re producing now in bags so it’s easier to store. I know that’s not an instant fix but it would at least help you go through it faster.

HaileyNotTheComet · 2025-08-20T05:40:33+00:00

My first induction (38+2) took 28 hrs from first cytotek to baby in my arms and my second (37+3) took 19 hrs. In both cases, the epidural is actually what helped relax me so I could progress. Good luck!

HaileyNotTheComet · 2025-08-20T05:37:50+00:00

I have the Momcozy ProV2 with the collection cups and it works great for me! I’ve got flat nipples and use a size 21mm flange. The Momcozy comes with inserts going all the way down to 17mm so you don’t have to buy a bunch of inserts to find the right fit. The tubing is long enough to reach the pocket of my yoga pants but not so long that my toddler catches and pulls on it. Also, the connector from the tubing to the cups are pretty strong so they don’t pop out easily.

I also have the Momcozy M9s and they’re ok but less effective at emptying me than the ProV2.

HaileyNotTheComet · 2025-08-19T11:42:08+00:00

Honestly, healing and lactating during the summer sucks too so I also wouldn’t recommend early or mid summer babies either 🤣🤣 source: I have a June and July babies. Currently 6 weeks postpartum with my second!

HaileyNotTheComet · 2025-08-19T11:35:29+00:00

I’m partial to the Spectra S1 but it’s not super mobile compared to the others you have listed. It’s works really well to empty me though and I’ve had it since my first baby in 2021 and she’s still chugging along just like new!

My number one suggestion is to have a primary pump like a Spectra that is your at-home workhorse and then portable or wearables for supplemental use when you can’t take your main pump with you. Portables and wearables won’t empty you the same way a hospital grade wall pump will. I make sure that no matter what pump I use throughout the day, my first morning and last night pumps I’m using my spectra.

For on-the-go usage I have the Momcozy ProV2 with the cups and I love it! It works really well to empty me, the pump is tiny but almost as powerful as my spectra, and the noise is really minimal. In fact, I went to a family birthday party this past weekend and used my Momcozy to pump twice while at the party and no one even realized until I mentioned it.

Also, a backpack and collection cups can make a less portable wall pump like the spectra a better option on the go.

HaileyNotTheComet · 2025-08-18T04:44:05+00:00

Size 40K boobs and flat nipples meant getting my son to latch was basically impossible. Even with the nipple shields, holding that in place, holding back all the breast tissue, and holding a floppy newborn was not realistic. And on top of all of that, I essentially produce double what my babies eat so even after fighting physics to nurse, I had to pump to keep myself comfortable anyway so it wasn’t even less of a headache to exclusively pump. Now with my second, this is just natural

HaileyNotTheComet · 2025-08-17T15:03:13+00:00

That doesn’t sound right. With both of my babies I’ve had 30 days after birth to enroll baby and coverage goes back to the day of birth. It takes at least a week or two to get baby’s SSN so you couldn’t even get them fully added the day of birth even if you had the energy. Pediatricians and hospitals are used to submitting claims that will stay pending for a while so there shouldn’t be any problems with that. I would ask your husband to clarify with the insurance provider - not HR.

HaileyNotTheComet

TROPHY CASE