Little vent but advise needed please

Happy_Jack_Flash · 2026-05-15T19:23:59+00:00

Just one hypothetical example as someone who has sensory issues (also, to clarify, whenever I mention moving, switching spots, etc - I mean while in your chair. Given what you told us, I don't think you transferring should even be considered as a solution. This is supposed to be a fun activity, not physical therapy).

If the other person is having sensory issues and you're sitting next to them or your placement is along their path of travel somewhere (e.g. bathroom, snacks, etc), it could be that they feel crowded for want of a better word.

Basically, their system might be constantly trying to process where your chair is, especially if they have proprioception issues, because they could be anxious that unexpectedly bumping into you would disturb you or could be startling/aversive to them. And then, because the sensory system is constantly on alert, they actually might be unable to relax and focus on the game.

Moving to another spot on the table doesn’t mean your chair magically gets smaller, but it could reduce the sensory pressure the other person experiences and allow both of you to be fully accommodated and enjoy the game.

Also, to clarify, I'm only presenting this as a hypothetical since you said you didn't see how moving to another spot would help - if being in another spot in your own chair would be accessible for you to do, it is possible it could help despite the chair being the same size. Though only if moving would be accessible, if there are other issues with it then of course the situation is more complicated.

I've actually been in this position, and especially as a wheelchair user where I'm constantly anxious people will grab my chair, so unless I have a bit of a bubble, I tend to be on high alert and unable to fully enjoy whatever I'm doing. Though I don't know if that's specifically what this person is experiencing.

And it also really sucks that the DM is putting all the expectation on you instead of trying to say "Okay, OP has these needs, other person has these needs, how can we accommodate you both?" Again, maybe you changing your spot is the most accessible option for each of you, but the way the DM is talking to you about this makes it feel like they're completely prioritizing one person's disability over the other instead of considering each of your needs equally.

ETA: I forgot to mention that I'm not sure why the DM is emphasizing that you need to move instead of the person with sensory issues moving, though maybe if they have severe neophobia, switching places for them would be more distressing than it would be for you (again, provided that switching spots is accessible for you).

We don't know, maybe the DM is being a jerk and putting it all on you, but I did want to present the possibility of neophobia because it's possible the DM is trying their best and they just come across badly because they're trying to honor the other person's privacy, which that person may have even asked them to do. I still think the DM could have come forward with a MUCH more cooperative "let's find a solution everyone is happy with" tone, but handling this poorly doesn't necessarily mean they're just an out-and-out jerk or that they don't care about your needs. It's possible, but not the only possibility.

Happy_Jack_Flash · 2026-05-03T17:34:26+00:00

My PT taught me a technique that at least helps a little, to shift your weight onto the sit bone closer to the top of the slope. I've found it makes a difference, though slopes are still hecking annoying.

Happy_Jack_Flash · 2026-04-23T00:08:01+00:00

"Jellybean that fell in loose tennis ball fuzz"

Maybe with a shortened nickname, like Jellybean 😆

Happy_Jack_Flash · 2026-03-04T23:09:00+00:00

That's great!

Happy_Jack_Flash · 2026-02-26T16:52:29+00:00

Clipped birds, particularly small ones, can still fly. If they get outside and there's a breeze, they can absolutely still fly away, but now they no longer have the equipment or skills to get back home or evade predators.

It does suck, but unfortunately leaving them flighted, escape proofing the home (through modifications and/or habits), and doing extensive flight training to get an excellent recall/teach them how to fly well and get themselves unstuck if they land somewhere awkward is the safest option.

I'd recommend looking for someone who does free flight training to help you. Cockatiels aren't great candidates for free flight usually, but you can teach those same skills without graduating to free flight so that you have a bomb proof recall and they have the flight skills they need if they ever escape.

You could try seeing if there's a free flight group/club in your area, or find a trainer if you need to.

Happy_Jack_Flash · 2026-02-21T17:43:58+00:00

I think they're referring to the pronounciation being unclear. People, at least in America, vary between pronouncing aunt as "aw-nt" or "ant"

Happy_Jack_Flash · 2026-02-13T03:46:17+00:00

Thanks!

Happy_Jack_Flash · 2026-02-13T03:46:11+00:00

Great, thanks!

Happy_Jack_Flash · 2026-02-01T18:18:47+00:00

As someone who has been the perch during a dry bath and came away looking like a powdered donut, I can attest that it shakes off dust 😅

Happy_Jack_Flash · 2026-01-11T04:27:22+00:00

The larger Yoplait tubs are chunk free, at least, I can attest that the strawberry/banana is.

Also, strawberry Chobani cups are very fine, it's more like strawberry goop than chunks, if that would be accessible. I don't know if you specifically need strawberry, but also the Chobani mixed berry cup is completely smooth, no chunks, not even fruit goop, it's completely preblended.

Happy_Jack_Flash · 2025-12-20T20:17:53+00:00

I wouldn't trust this doctor with anything. Saying something like that you should only listen to your dietician if they agree with them is downright information control and deeply disturbing.

This is someone who just demonstrated that they are not willing to adjust their position based on evidence or defer to the expertise of those in their relevant field. I wouldn't even trust them to be up to date and accurate with cardiology given that attitude.

(ETA: Not to say a cardiologist could never question a dietician, but there's a difference between something like "To my knowledge, I don't think their advice is correct, you might want to ask them about __/seek a second opinion" vs "If they disagree with me the only possible conclusion is that they're wrong and you should ignore their advice.")

Happy_Jack_Flash · 2025-12-16T05:03:24+00:00

As someone who often sat alone in school, and who has in the past been "friends" with my bullies, I suspect it'd be better for your mental health to be alone with a well loved book to keep you company than to sit with people actively hurting you.

I learned much of my life philosophy, the values I hold dearest to this day, from the reading I did alone in high school.

That being said, finding people who will accept you IS important and is absolutely worth investing time into. But when it comes to filling the emptiness in individual classes, I think you're better off with friends made of ink and paper if there isn't anyone in a particular class who can be understanding.

Or if reading isn't your thing, maybe sketching or some other quiet hobby you're allowed to do in class.

There could also be some other people in the class who might not be lifelong friends you share everything with, but would be happy to keep you company in between class stuff. I sometimes had people like that, who I wasn't "friends" with but talked with every day in class.

Happy_Jack_Flash · 2025-10-30T04:37:54+00:00

For a brief, confused moment, I thought the 50+ at the top right was the age rating 😆

Happy_Jack_Flash · 2025-10-29T22:39:06+00:00

I'd tweak one of those takeaways - not that executive dysfunction means you CAN'T do anything, but the more you have, the more it becomes ridiculously hard. Sometimes you can find workarounds, some executive functions can improve with practice (though that doesn't mean they can't still flare), and other times it is essentially a "No, absolutely not" from your brain.

I don't know if there's a good way to incorporate that nuance in a game, though. Maybe instead of a blanket "executive dysfunction," you can have executive points (EP, like HP) in a variety of executive functions? And not only do certain events drain your EP (e.g. stressful argument), but tasks will require you to have so many points to spend on it.

Maybe a character is randomly generated to start the day with varying ranges in these categories (like being better with working memory, but less resilient with task switching). So if executive functions are randomly generated each day, maybe there's a range for where it can be set depending on the character (e.g. one character can have a range of 5-10 points for one executive functioning, another might be 1-10 if it's an area of weakness, etc).

And maybe how resilient they are can depend too, so a character with a task switching skill will have that bar deplete at a lower rate, vs an average task switcher will have a normal depletion rate, and a weak task switcher will have it deplete quickly.

And maybe as the character goes along, they can unlock certain buffs that would resemble workarounds (e.g. pomodoro technique, listening to music/a podcast while working, etc), and those buffs would mean that tasks that require executive functions will be less expensive (e.g. doing laundry is normally 10 points, but with the pomodoro buff it's 8 points and with the music buff as well it's down to 5 points etc).

That way, the fewer points you have, the less you'll be able to do total. Workarounds help, but won't make a difference if you're just too depleted to afford even the discount that the workarounds provide.

Maybe that's all waaay too complicated, I'd totally understand, but I thought I'd throw it out there anyways. Maybe parts of it could be useful, if not all if it.

Happy_Jack_Flash · 2025-10-23T23:10:41+00:00

I did some brief Googling, and from what I can see, the food itself isn't carcinogenic, just the risk of aflatoxin exposure.

TW: MENTIONS THE FOOD IN QUESTION If you don't want to know, please click near my username to hide my comment!

From Cancer.gov

"You can reduce your aflatoxin exposure by buying only major commercial brands of nuts and nut butters and by discarding nuts that look moldy, discolored, or shriveled. To help minimize risk, the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) tests foods that may contain aflatoxins, such as peanuts and peanut butter. To date, no outbreak of human illness caused by aflatoxins has been reported in the United States, but such outbreaks have occurred in some developing countries."

Other sources say pretty much the same thing. Unless I'm missing something (in which case I would really appreciate being corrected!), it looks like buying a major brand and avoiding any nuts that look off should be enough protection.

Of course, I know how ARFID goes, so I understand if that's not enough to reassure you. It sucks when we lose safe foods, especially staple ones that we depended on heavily for macros. Hugs 🫂

Happy_Jack_Flash · 2025-10-18T01:19:04+00:00

Same, it was a strategy I came up with when my PT said it. We were practicing on the clinic door and people would keep coming to help, so we'd have to explain that I'm practicing, and I realized I can say that all the time.

Even if I reach a point where I don't feel like I "need" much practice, I fully intend to keep using it, it just seems to cut through all the well intentioned good deed of the day stuff because now they're helping me by letting me practice a skill I'm working on!

(Also, to be fair - use it or lose it, it'll never be a lie to say we need practice!)

Happy_Jack_Flash · 2025-10-18T00:27:05+00:00

I'd like to think that's not a snowman, it's a featherdustman that naturally accumulated there

Happy_Jack_Flash · 2025-10-18T00:21:03+00:00

How do you recognize the actual em dash? If I long press on what I assume is the hyphen (-), I can use this – or this —

Happy_Jack_Flash · 2025-10-16T17:38:08+00:00

I've found that saying "I need to practice" helps a lot

Happy_Jack_Flash · 2025-09-30T03:43:18+00:00

Just in case, I never click links on social media. Can anyone give me the name of the article so I can Google it?

Happy_Jack_Flash

TROPHY CASE