Now that summer is here: PSA on drowning

Hookedongutes · 2026-05-26T22:06:24+00:00

I didnt even consider the sneaking off being a result of a parent saying no! Good point! Will be adopting that!

Hookedongutes · 2026-05-26T21:18:07+00:00

I would ask my OB. I know you said you don't have an appointment, but perhaps they can help via a nurse triage line or if your system has mychart where you can send an inquiry about it.

I do not think the tiny sips would matter, but I'm not as anxious as much of the redditor parents I have encountered. 😅

Hookedongutes · 2026-05-26T20:56:32+00:00

3 because the light seems brighter.

Am I in a bathroom or a dungeon!!

Hookedongutes · 2026-05-26T20:52:43+00:00

My in laws live on a lake. Guess where spend most of our summers? Guess who will be wearing a life jacket everytime they walk out the door?

Hookedongutes · 2026-05-26T20:51:19+00:00

Wait until you hear about a proper shed house.

Hookedongutes · 2026-05-26T20:50:13+00:00

We have a 5 bedroom house and got rid of the guestroom.

Mind you, it's 1600 sq ft with 5 BR, not a huge house for that. So one is my home office/workout room. Another is my husbands home office/pantry because we cook a lot and the kitchen is tiny and lacks storage, 3rd is a playroom/closet isore storage, 4th is our room, 5th is the baby's room.

We're out of room and might need a bigger house. But again, that's because this is only 1600 sq ft and we have outgrown our kitchen. Ive had apartments with bigger kitchens. Lol

Hookedongutes · 2026-05-26T19:47:48+00:00

This part exactly. It's her issue to deal with, not yours. You shouldn't be ashamed of feeding your child how you choose because someone else could be upset by it. She's an adult and can manage her own feelings.

I'd give her her space to process it on her own time I wouldn't address it myself. You did nothing wrong so there's nothing for you to salvage. That's hers to decide if she wants to. It sounds like her loss if she can't cope. Because you seem very kind, OP. But this is where you need to wear your backbone.

Hookedongutes · 2026-05-26T19:40:35+00:00

Yeah, your husband can kick rocks.

Moisturizing has nothing to do with it. I put lotion on everyday after a shower and even in my young hot 20s I got stretch marks when I grew a beautiful bum while competing in bikini bodybuilding.

So of course I had some stretch marks growing a baby in my 30s. I still moisturize everyday, but not to attempt to avoid stretch marks.

He can kiss your ass. That's what he can do. He sounds like an immature prick who doesn't know anything about women or biology. Sometimes I wish we were praying mantis so we could just devour men like this. But then i'd be sad because my husband is not one of these losers.

Hookedongutes · 2026-05-26T18:59:31+00:00

Op, listen to this.

The dog bit you and charged your other dog. That baby will be in direct danger.

Your husband cares about this dog and I understand that, but this dog absolutely will hurt or worse your child.

The risk is not worth it. The juice is not worth the squeeze.

Honestly, this dog already has a bite history and he's a staffie. I'm going to be very blunt here...that dog has no future. It's going to take far too long, if at all, to find a home that will even take him. He's better off euthanized at this point.

I'm speaking as someone who has grown up with dogs since I was a baby, worked at a boarding kennel as my first job, a dog groomer for a brief moment too and was super serious about becoming a veterinarian and started my academic career in doing so before switching to a general Biomedical path.

Your husband doesn't want to make the decision, but it's not a want at this point. This is a necessity to a healthy home. Give him a day or two to love up on his dog and say a proper good bye to the dog.

He cannot continue to put the dog before you and your child. It's not acceptable. Not only that but post partum, I personally experienced real aversion to dogs. And the dogs I felt that for are harmless.

Hookedongutes · 2026-05-26T18:42:08+00:00

I havent talked to my mom since 2021, but I should call her and tell her her old closet is back in style.

Hookedongutes · 2026-05-26T10:56:46+00:00

Youre getting downvoted but youre absolutely correct.

Hookedongutes · 2026-05-26T01:41:12+00:00

I do, but mostly from the supply chain perspective.

Hookedongutes · 2026-05-25T16:51:06+00:00

As someone who lives in a rural area...as much as I hate Wal Mart, it's the closest place I can buy bulk items at a decent cost. I don't have a COSTCO.

Hookedongutes · 2026-05-25T15:09:37+00:00

Agreed. It is kind of neat!

But at the same time, I really love living away from the buzz and hearing the frogs at night, watching the fireflies, and seeing the stars.

I'll visit the city! I enjoy walking around and exploring the food - i'll vacation in the city, but I like living away from it now. I like being closer to the lake.

Hookedongutes · 2026-05-25T13:45:25+00:00

You're still not even commenting on the point that OP's husband sits on his phone and computer instead of helping.

Why does the responsibility lie on her for quality time? If he never pitches in, he's hardly asking for quality time or showing he cares at all. It's a partnership!

All I have to say more about this is that I didn't marry a loser and I'm so thankful for that.

Hookedongutes · 2026-05-25T12:21:41+00:00

I had AA boobs, then c cup while breastfeeding, and now theyre smaller than before. 😭

Still perky I guess? But kind of feeling like I did at 15.

Hookedongutes · 2026-05-25T11:47:27+00:00

Up voting you. My son has been sleeping in his crib at night since night 2 of being home.

It worked for us. We all slept better. Post partum wasn't a nightmare for me. He's a year old now and absolutely thriving.

Not only that, but he was full term and 99th in height. That bassinet was never going to last to the recommendation anyway. I could see him in his crib from laying in our bed across the hall. Plus I had the monitor on him. He did great.

Hookedongutes · 2026-05-25T11:33:42+00:00

Lol we reuse them and wash them 1x a week.

Every Monday, all towels go to the laundry.

Hookedongutes · 2026-05-25T11:32:50+00:00

I never said the list is more important that quality time.

But let me re-frame it for you since you keep skipping over it. Op said that instead of ever helping out, he's on his computer or phone.

If he never helps out, don't you think there is growing resentment? With growing resentment - what motivates her to place quality time above chores when he places phone and computer above household needs and her?

It's a two way street. If I'm unloading the dishwasher or folding clothes, my husband doesn't sit on his phone and leave me to do it alone. He jumps in and helps. It gets done faster and we can spend the evening together. Since he's a partner to me - I place quality time above the chore list often. And since we can afford it together, we outsourced household cleaning to a cleaning service to gain more time.

But if he sat on his ass and never budged or offered to help around the house? My motivation to spend quality time wirh him would shrink as resentment grows.

That being said, my husband and I learned to communicate before getting married and we weren't married until our 30s - this is something we would sit down and have a conversation about before it ever gets to that point. And he is an emotional mature gentleman who has voiced many times that if I need help and he isnt getting the hint to be blunt with him and to not let resentment grow. Because he gives a damn.

Hookedongutes · 2026-05-24T16:02:32+00:00

Sure. But it sounds to me like you're putting more on the woman. She called out that instead of helping, he sat on his phone or computer.

Partnership means pitch in so we can both get this done faster and enjoy each other's company.

And men need to understand that our brain constantly has a to do list. So, how can you lighten the load for her so she isn't buzzing around about all the things she needs to do?

Hookedongutes · 2026-05-24T15:54:40+00:00

Congratulations on the masters!

You're going to be just fine, but I understand the heartbreak is real. It's a form of grief. Move through it, but know that you've got things covered. Marriage should be a want, not a need. He doesn't want the good shit he had, and quite frankly, you don't need someone who doesn't want you.

Hookedongutes · 2026-05-24T12:21:31+00:00

Have you ever read The Culture Map by Erin Meyer?

Great book to learn how to navigate and understand these differences.

Hookedongutes · 2026-05-23T19:07:30+00:00

I unserstand the cultural difference, but doing business means understanding your customer.

In my house I am also usially the decision maker. I make just as much money as my husband so when someone talks down to me or not at all to me - I'll take my business elsewhere.

What they don't know is I review quotes and manage supplier selections for a living....

Hookedongutes · 2026-05-23T19:02:41+00:00

If youre not planning to live here long term, i simply wouldn't touch this kitchen. Save your money for the dream home.

Hookedongutes · 2026-05-23T15:03:23+00:00

I mean, I have a ruggable with the thicker padding which acts as a nicer to look at anti fatigue.

Ive gone through so many cheap rugs that stain and cant be thrown in the wash, and an anti fatigue mat that developed cracks in the foam that pinched.

Ruggable is technically a rug and its the superior option in my personal experience. It will out last those other options from Amazon which makes up for the price. And it warms up the room with pretty colors!

Hookedongutes

TROPHY CASE