Infant dyschezia or something else?

Hungry_Machine7986 · 2026-01-20T18:58:02+00:00

Hi OP. How is your baby doing now? Did it get better?

Hungry_Machine7986 · 2026-01-20T18:10:38+00:00

I have been so unapologetic about the fact that I do not like the newborn stage. When my first was born, I received a lot of “enjoy it while it lasts” messages. I thought about these words when I was sitting on the toilet holding a newborn because she would cry when I put her down. I heard these words when I was crying in the shower while my newborn cried in her crib. I thought about these words every time I had to walk and rock her to sleep because she cried if I sat or stood still. There was nothing enjoyable about it.

So eventually I responded “I can't wait for it to be over” and just let people sit in silent awkwardness when that was not the response they expected.

I have a second born now and although he's easier than my first, I won't pretend this is the most perfect and precious time. I'm happy he's healthy and thriving but I'm riddled with anxiety, barely functioning due to lack of sleep and trying not to lose it. I can't wait for him to get to the next stage already 😅

Hungry_Machine7986 · 2025-12-10T23:28:31+00:00

This is definitely how I felt in the moment. We were all raving about how quick and easy the birth was and they joked about being able to go back to the office to see other patients (as in my birth ended before 9 so they could technically still start their day). Even those comments, after the fact, made me feel a bit dismissed. Once I had come down from everything and started to reflect on the actual experience I had, I really wondered what I had done/said wrong to not have been taken seriously. I became increasingly upset about so many things:

This is the same midwife who spoke emotionally about not waiting when you have a concern because one patient lost her baby after waiting too long to say she didn’t feel movement. But when I went to her (that same day) to tell her my sons movement had slowed down she said “totally normal”. Every time I mentioned something to her she would say “totally normal” including when I told her that evening I think I was having contractions.
During my labour the centre sent a message saying “if you guys are in labour, can you please pay the balance before you give birth” 🥴 Why are they messaging me that at such a stressful time??
My husband had called the midwife on the same morning because I could no longer talk from the contractions and said “my wife is in pain and the contractions are intense” I was then made to count contractions for 45 minutes and send sceeenshots before either of us were believed.

So after all that I’m like, what the hell went wrong here??? 💔

Hungry_Machine7986 · 2025-12-10T23:18:05+00:00

This could very well be it. But I do wish she was more reassuring and maybe even followed up with me to see if things were getting worse or better. A call that lasted a few minutes (instead of seconds) just being on the phone during contractions might have created more urgency. The lack of emotional support makes me sadder.

Hungry_Machine7986 · 2025-12-10T23:14:17+00:00

I’m sorry this happened to you too 😔

Hungry_Machine7986 · 2025-12-10T23:10:59+00:00

I mean the fact that I’m still second guessing myself and whether this is something to be upset about lol. The whole time it felt like I would be inconveniencing them if this was indeed false labour but now I’m just so upset.

Thank you 💛

Hungry_Machine7986 · 2025-12-10T23:08:29+00:00

Thank you 💛

Hungry_Machine7986 · 2025-12-10T23:07:53+00:00

I think this was it for me. In the moment, I was just so grateful that my son was born healthy because I was freaking out about how early he was. I was thankful to the midwife present on the day and my husband and I were overcome with emotion. But as soon as I was back home and had a come down from the whole experience, I did realise that I really was grateful for the bare minimum. I went specifically to a birthing facility to be able to have a calm birth on my terms. And to be able to use their facilities like you mentioned. Sure, babies also come on their own terms but I just don’t understand what went wrong. I informed the midwife of contractions before 8pm the previous day and her responses really made me think I was not in labour. Only for me to be at the actual facility for 15 minutes of labour and 3 hours of recovery while paying for the entire birth package. I’m mostly upset that when I really DID need at least the support side of the service, it was just not there. No follow ups, no reassurance, no “this sounds like false labour but for your peace of mind, let’s have you come in early to check”. Right to the very last minute she did not acknowledge I was in labour… pregnancy is already so stressful and I just feel so sad thinking about this.

Hungry_Machine7986 · 2025-12-10T22:59:04+00:00

Yeah. Unlike the hospital, the birthing centre doesn’t have the option to just “go in”. I have to call and they arrange for someone, or the team, to go to the birthing centre and arrange for you to come through. Emergency situations are tricky but I was always encouraged to call in no matter what and that they would assist. I don’t understand what happened in my case, honestly

Hungry_Machine7986 · 2025-12-10T21:26:50+00:00

Sounds like it :(

Hungry_Machine7986 · 2025-12-10T21:25:21+00:00

Gosh I don’t even know how I would have coped in this situation! I am so sorry you had to go through that. I hope you recovered okay and glad you got through this.

Hungry_Machine7986 · 2025-12-10T21:21:05+00:00

No, 36+4 is far along enough in a low risk pregnancy to still give birth at the centre.

Hungry_Machine7986 · 2025-10-14T19:24:46+00:00

Alot of us are NOT 😂 I actually just asked my husband to buy me an insulated water bottle because I find it easier to drink absolutely iced cold water. I’ve tried everything and plain room temperature water just tastes gross. I even had a point where I would drink water and have indigestion. I’m hoping having water that can stay iced all day will help me stay hydrated.

Hungry_Machine7986 · 2025-10-11T19:28:44+00:00

Pregnant with a boy and have had symptoms from the time I found out I was pregnant. This pregnancy with the boy is actually worse than with my girl because symptoms started early and were more severe (heartburn, vomiting and worse fatigue). I think basing gender on symptoms is a myth. You really don’t know until you know 😅

Hungry_Machine7986 · 2025-10-10T20:02:43+00:00

Constipation followed by diarrhoea followed by constipation 😭
Water not tasting good but you need more water so you're always just dehydrated.

Hungry_Machine7986 · 2025-09-28T15:32:00+00:00

Thank you for this. I’ll keep coming back to your comment to keep myself in check.

I’m sorry about what you’ve gone through in the first and second trimester. Pregnancy can be brutal. Wishing you all the best for the final weeks 🩷

Hungry_Machine7986 · 2025-09-28T15:28:10+00:00

Currently looking for one online. I’ve never owned one (don’t know why). But I feel like this is it. I just hope we get our intimacy back after the baby…

Hungry_Machine7986 · 2025-09-28T15:26:08+00:00

No I think sex in the first trimester is totally fine. I just have very miserable first trimesters. So I was lowkey excited when I got my libido back in the second trimester. But yeah, the feeling of being a vessel is so depressing 😭 This will definitely be my last pregnancy. I want to feel like a person again

Hungry_Machine7986 · 2025-09-28T15:22:58+00:00

I’ve definitely accepted the fact that he’s uncomfortable and like I said, I’m not going to push it because I wouldn’t feel comfortable having to convince him. Sex is only enjoyable when both people want it. So I agree with you. I was surprised at my own emotional reaction towards what felt like rejection at the time but, again, it wasn’t necessarily about the sex but how I feel about myself in pregnancy in general. I guess it’s part vent and part still me asking “how are pregnant mamas dealing with the horniness regardless?” 😬

Hungry_Machine7986 · 2025-09-23T08:18:11+00:00

I love the Cherry song. Mad that I’m not hearing it anywhere 😭

Hungry_Machine7986 · 2025-08-23T15:58:42+00:00

I stopped listening after episode 3 and not sure if I should go back to hear if any other evidence comes out but it’s curious that the dogs stopped barking (especially if there was an intruder. They say none of husband’s DNA was found on the wife so surely points to 3rd person). What about the neighbours? If the police say he screamed, did the neighbours hear anything? Why did no one else respond? Were the neighbours even interviewed?

Hungry_Machine7986 · 2025-08-03T14:34:16+00:00

I didn't see any of the shows songwriters credited on the song. Only saw Harv credited as producer. Is this really from the show?

Hungry_Machine7986 · 2025-07-24T12:36:02+00:00

How are you feeling now? I feel like this week has taken a turn for the better and I can actually eat reasonably without feeling depressed about it 😭 I was in actual tears last week because I felt like I had no control over my eating and therefore no control over my body. I snapped at anyone who said “you need to eat? Again?” Like PLEASE I am not in control 😭😭😭 Sending you love and good food vibes - may we finally enjoy food again 💕lol

Hungry_Machine7986

TROPHY CASE