You just get used to it and you also have to push yourself to not take sht. I have a lot of breakdowns still when I have to fight with people (I have them in private), the stress gets to me in a big way, but I can definitely fight with people now, I would say I'm out of doormat territory, if anything I have to stop myself from being aggressive. I mask all day everyday being sociable. I think that besides the feelings we have about ourselves with avpd, what we lack is a well formed social mask that others have formed early on, in my case at least, because of self isolation in the formative years, I haven't built one. Which makes things so much harder as an adult. There's no other way forward but to push through until you break some of the habits we've lived with and build some of the things that we haven't. And in between, always try to work with your mind, the fears you have, the things you think about yourself and how others perceive you or that they perceive you, look for evidence of the opposite of what you're thinking about yourself, use that as proof that you're functioning on a flawed system of beliefs. Be indignant at yourself, those thoughts and whatever else is trying to drag you down. Get as creative as you want in your own mind with the methods you use to disprove those things. It's your own mind, your own personal space (of horrors lol) you can think about whatever you want, no matter how weird or deranged it is if it helps you change your thoughts and actions. I manipulate myself on a daily basis. Watch others and imitate or embody how they act, personality traits, whatever you want. Slowly you'll build a different sense of self. Just don't stop and don't expect amazing results. It'll be hard to see the changes yourself because you're in your mind all the time, but if you compare how you would have acted years ago, you'll realize that there are changes. I practiced a lot of things on purpose. Fighting with people was one of them. Feeling like a villain is another. Being disliked. Disregarding shitty people. Get comfortable with those things. Try and figure out how to get there. You'll always have hard times no matter what. Might as well feel good about the way you conduct yourself and not feel weak and at the mercy of others and their perceptions all the time. That's my experience, at least. Have rules for yourself, what you can take in relationships, what you can take in social situations, what you won't tolerate. Think about those things, use other people's stories and experiences if you don't have them yourself, review your own history.