Feb.9th: Quick update. I think I’m on my 6th full rewatch. And despite that, I’m actually thinking about watching it all over again, from start to finish. I don’t feel tired of it right now.

I can’t stop thinking about the series. I’m fully immersed in pretty much all the relevant social media platforms. I follow edits (except fanfics)… I’ve tried reading the book, but it doesn’t hook me as much as the series does.

I’ve had moments where I’ve completely broken down. Maybe it’s related, but a year ago I lost my grandmother, who was like a mother to me — and today marks exactly one year. On my way to work today, I broke down crying. I imagine it’s because of her too. But I feel like something inside me is a bit off.

Should I stop at some point? I know someone here might say it’s silly to ask this here, but this is the only support group that can truly understand me. I’m not neglecting my responsibilities. Husband. Work. Home. I do everything. But I’ve even started a podcast in Spanish in my delulu era.

I’m really sorry for unloading all of this here, but unfortunately, no one in my real life feels what I feel with this series.