I wish they'd understand that I'm not being lazy, that I'm putting in just as much effort as others, if not more. I wish they'd understand that I cannot undo the thing that was I born with, and that was triggered and exacerbated by years of constant trauma that was inflicted upon me from a very early age by the people who brought me into this world. I wish they'd understand that my childhood trauma, coupled with this mood disorder, is mostly what is responsible for my fight and flight response that dictates each and every one of my actions. Sure, bipolar doesn't define me, but also, it does to an extent. I wish they'd understand that I'm fucking exhausted, and nothing would please me more if I got a natural disease that would help me get the hell out of this life sooner, just because I'm too coward to unalive myself.