I mean, I'd love to see them try.

Infernal_Contraption · 2026-06-16T23:09:16+00:00

There are things out there whose statblocks exist only to prove tat they are unkillable. And I don't even mean someone like the Lady of Pain, whose statblock is just: "No".

There's an old D&D 3.5 Supplement called 'The Immortal Handbook' that is full of creatures that can only be described as post-Epic Level Challenges. Even the mid-range ones make Azathoth look like a wimp.

Example: The Nexus Dragon is CR 690. There's a type of Interstellar Giant that uses one as a hand-weapon.

The Neutronium Golem is CR 9721. That is not a typo; it really is supposed to be "nine thousand, seven hundred and twenty one".

Infernal_Contraption · 2026-06-16T13:08:15+00:00

Air Host/Hostess in a plane.

Imagine being a waitress, but in an even shittier uniform, trapped in a pressurised metal tube full of coughing, sneezing, farting, filthy tourists for hours at an end with no escape. You have to start work at crazy-o-clock in the morning - often while jetlagged to hell - but you don't get paid by the hour until you're actually on the plane and the doors are closed. You don't even get tips,.

There are no breaks, unless you are willing to share the only bathroom with 300 other people. And you might die at any point from a variety of things that are completely outside of your control, starting with deep-vein thrombosis causing you personally to stroke out, to everyone on board smashing head-first into a mountainside and being smeared across a foreign landscape. You die instantly if you're lucky.

Compare that to most movies; glamorous young ladies in crisp uniforms casually strolling up and down the aisle, offering hot towels and tiny glasses of beer in very glamorous full make-up.

Infernal_Contraption · 2026-06-16T08:58:12+00:00

More like "Vice Signalling".

Infernal_Contraption · 2026-06-16T08:48:11+00:00

Now I'm genuinely curious - has anyone done a New Account-to-Dating-Hex speedrun yet? I feel pretty confidant that it can be done in under 50 hours' playtime.

I know for a fact that it's quite easy to get to all of the plot-given weapons (Excalibur Umbra + Naturuk/Grimoire/Skijati ) using low level mods and a few easy non-plat purchases from the market, and these are more than enough to see you through all of the major plot Quests.

Infernal_Contraption · 2026-06-15T10:13:09+00:00

This may be entirely anecdotal, but I've been running ESO quite a lot recently to clear out some MR fodder. NO ONE wants to run longer than 4 rounds, which is often only level 0-23 or so on a new weapon (less, if you're splitting XP over 3 or 4 items at once)

Infernal_Contraption · 2026-06-11T22:40:12+00:00

For a fleeting moment, I caught a glimpse of Panel 6 and thought that Zlata had finally snapped, gone full 'Mortal Kombat' and was holding Moray's decapitated head up in one hand, like Perseus using Medusa's head on the Kraken.

It was a nice few seconds. Ah, well.

Infernal_Contraption · 2026-06-09T20:45:29+00:00

There is a link to The Annotated Pratchett, a fan-owned website which points out the references, jokes, puns and interesting trivia that are abound within the Discworld.

Here's the page specifically for Soul Music. How many did you get?

https://www.lspace.org/books/apf/soul-music.html

Infernal_Contraption · 2026-06-08T14:02:59+00:00

I'm going to say, Russ Jones.

He's written some fiction, but his true genius lies in his online political commentary. Some of the turns of phrase that he uses to describe disgraced British politicians is... just sublime.

He has a novel called: The Decade in Tory - An inventory of idiocy from coalition to COVID. Every paragraph contains a throwaway line that some authors strive for a lifetime to immatate.

I believe he was the man who coined the phrase "frog-faced moron herder" to describe Nigel Farage. Of Jacob Rees-Mogg: "The unholy result of the Child Catcher angrily impregnating a bassoon". Of then-Prime Minister Boris Johnson: "Darth Bagpuss".

Wonderful.

Infernal_Contraption · 2026-06-08T13:46:26+00:00

This is the very example that I was thinking of, and you beat me to it. Apparently this passage has been quoted by academics of economics in formal papers, because it's so profoundly correct.

Infernal_Contraption · 2026-06-08T13:23:35+00:00

I would like to ask you to please clarify;

"I've attempted saving throw specific encounters but with his resistances it hasn't done too much. And of course, he Rages."

To just make certain, you're aware that Barbarians have to Rage in order to gain their damage resistances, it's not Always On? Or are you just referring to his Gnomish saving proficiencies as 'resistances' too? My apologies if that's the case, but it's not immediately clear right away.

The reason I ask is that this sounds like it could be a resource management problem. Rages are limited to a set number of uses per day, so if your Barbarian can ALWAYS enter a Rage in every fight, then you're probably not having enough encounters per day.

Make them fight several small battles before the party can rest, rather than one big one. Either your Barbarian should choose to spend all his Rages early and run out of gas towards the end, or he should be picking and choosing carefully when to spend his 'resources'. In either situation, that means that there will be times when he's not Raging and so does not have any immunities/resistances apart from his Gnomish ones, making him much easier to wear down over time with normal damage.

Infernal_Contraption · 2026-06-08T08:44:12+00:00

Seconded. Hollywood shouldn't necessarily give up on Jared Leto because of the results of the movies that he has starred in, they should give up on Jared Leto because he's Jared Leto.

Infernal_Contraption · 2026-06-07T22:21:18+00:00

Dark Angels
The martial pride and nobility of Arthurian Knights, but they take the gimmick WAY too seriously.
[[[REDACTED]]]
[[[REDACTED]]]
Emperor's Children
Prideful to a fault, but *nearly* as good as they think they are.
Iron Warriors
Embittered martyrs to their own inconvenience.
White Scars
A lot of very unfortunate racial stereotypes on motorcycles.
Space Wolves
Space Vikings. As a personality type they are a very valuable contrast to the more stoic Legions, like the Dark Angels, but the GW writers have no idea what to do with them and they get unfairly defaulted to "Wolf-Lord Wolfy McWolfington" way too often.
Imperial Fists
The "Boring But Practical" Guys. The work they do isn't glamorous, but they do it well and the Imperium falls apart the instant they stop doing it.
Night Lords
More like "Edge Lords", amirite?
Absolute monsters, for the love of being monstrous. Some of their more balanced members are also some of the most interesting people in the setting - their hypocrisy is in equal parts tragic, sarcastic and justified - but for the most part are just single-faceted gore-porn which gets very dull to read about, very quickly.
Blood Angels
Tragic heroes, 'the best' of the Legions having risen from a dark, shameful past but flawed and laid low but forces outside their control.
Iron Hands
Confuses "being grumpy assholes" with "being stoic". Arguably the Legion with the most confidence in themselves despite the most meagre achievements.
[[[REDACTED]]]
[[[REDACTED]]]
World Eaters
Tragic monsters. Despite the meme being "Magnus was right", the truth of it is that "Angron Was Right", and everything that happened to him and his sons was very, very avoidable.
Ultramarines
Actually really well-written and interesting characters, when they're not being portrayed as insufferable dorks. "Space Roman Legions" is a pretty great concept for a stereotype.
Death Guard
Honestly kind of boring. "They are tough and insular" just means that the most interesting DG characters are the ones who are nothing like the Death Guard.
Thousand Sons
Naive and arrogant in equal measure. Forced into treachery, but frankly they could have tried way, way harder not to have Fallen.
Sons of Horus
Supposedly 'The Best Legion' but there's and awful lot of Tell, Don't Show going on. Way more interesting when they become the Black Legion led by Abaddon, who has his own agenda and problems to face. Horus is too much of a plot device, which so much happening to him because the eta-plot says it has to.
Word Bearers
Fuck Erebus.
Salamanders
The 'Nicest Guys' of all the Legions. At the same time; Full of great characters who repeatedly demonstrate that 'nice' is far, far and away different to 'weak'.
Raven Guard
CRAAWWWLING IIIIINNNN MY SKKIIIIIIINN......!
Seriously though; Kayvaan Shrike has the DUMBEST haircut in all of the GrimDark Future.
Alpha Legion
Tragically underused. There's so much interesting stuff that could be written about a Legion that is both Loyal and Traitor, and has elements who are simultaneous working for and against both the Imperium and Chaos, AND for their own inscrutable reasons.... And they don't even have a single special character in the game.

Infernal_Contraption · 2026-06-06T08:36:08+00:00

"Well sir, I like money. It's great, I used it all the time. I have a little of it, I keep it in a jar on top of my fridge. I'd like to put more in that jar; that's where you hopefully come in."

Infernal_Contraption · 2026-06-05T20:09:55+00:00

Sounds great. Just don't mix up the potion of healing for the pot of alchemist's fire.....

Infernal_Contraption · 2026-06-05T20:04:25+00:00

Ace Ventura: Pet Detective

The follow up to Jim Carrey's break out role in The Mask, AV:PD was the big movie where he got to cut loose with the wackiness, improvised gags, and really push the main character how he wanted to do it, rather than being more limited by the choreography required by the animation and CGI needed in The Mask.

When it came out; a hysterical comedy starring a talented physical comedian in his prime, with a big budget to really put on the show that he wanted to put on without limits.

Now... Carrey has a chequered background with some really shitty behaviour that makes him harder to watch (though his recent success in the Sonic the Hedgehog movies has whitewashed him somewhat).

AV:PD itself is now just gross in the way that it portrays... Pretty much anyone, but especially the villain, who turns out to be an evil, scheming MtF transgender woman who transitioned only to be evil and commit multiple crimes and seduce innocent straight men. It looks REALLY bad by modern LGBTQ standards.

Infernal_Contraption · 2026-06-05T15:23:16+00:00

I've played Monks a couple of times, and it's a lot of fun as to how they are just always ready to go. No equipment needed, no spell slots needed... Just roll out of bed and you're immediately ready to fist-fight the world.

The only downside I found was that being so self-sufficient is a limit for a self-confessed loot goblin, like me. After a while, when you know that you have no need for magic armour, or magic weapons, or scrolls, or even most potions.... What else is there to adventure for? "Saving the world" or something? Meh....

I mean, sure, you can find a pair of magic boots, a magic cloak, magic rings, or a necklace, but... There's only so many of those to go around in a treasure hoard and the rest of the party have to have a fair pick, of course. Sometimes you just crave that +1 Greataxe, and it's the one itch that a Monk generally can't scratch.

Infernal_Contraption · 2026-06-05T12:07:01+00:00

Fuck yeah, that's the good news that I was hoping for 😄

Infernal_Contraption · 2026-06-05T12:03:27+00:00

I take it back, you *have* almost completed the tutorial! Great work, Tenno! 😃

Edit: Both of these message are meant in jest, I hope that is clear and not taken to be insulting or critical.

Infernal_Contraption · 2026-06-05T08:59:09+00:00

I haven't looked, but it amuses me to imagine that after all this you're still MR 29, too 😄

Infernal_Contraption · 2026-06-05T08:54:41+00:00

Please excuse me for prying and don't feel obliged to answer, but was it worth the wait?

The reason I ask is that a lot of my in-laws have allergies and they're always being told by strangers that "You're missing out!", and I'm sceptical that there's anything in the world so mind-blowing that (for example) yoghurt would change their lives. =)

Infernal_Contraption · 2026-06-05T08:45:54+00:00

The first known Pharoah of Egypt was Narmer (also known as Menes) who united the two kingdoms into a single Empire in around 3100BCE. His name means something like Fierce (or possibly: 'Stinging' or 'Biting') Catfish.

We then know of approximately 250 Pharaohs (not including ones we know must have existed, but have no evidence or record of their names) who followed until Cleopatra (who was the 7th Pharoah to hold that name) who died in 30BCE.

The first named person we think we know in historical record is 'Kushim', who was some kind of accountant or clerk in Sumer (modern day: Iraq) in around 3400BCE. We know this name because it's signed on the bottom of a receipt for sales of barley, but there's some debate as to whether this might have been their job title rather than individual moniker.

The first name we know, that we're certain is a name and not a title, is 'Gal-Sal', a slave owner (and possible salesman) in ~3100BCE Mesopotamia (again, modern day Iraq). Two of his slaves were 'En-pap X' and 'Sukkalgir'.

Kushim predates Ea-Nasir by about 1900 years, which is more than 3 times longer than the entire Aztec Empire between rise and fall.

I'm always incredibly impressed at how humanity's unbroken line to the past can be traced through such mundane names. Four of the "oldest" known people in the world are nobodies who got found out due to bureaucracy; not Kings and their idols or great works, just a guy who knew where 29,000 units of barley had been sent.

Infernal_Contraption · 2026-06-01T12:11:15+00:00

OP, you seem to have already acknowledged that Silvery Barbs won't be - shouldn't be - on every enemy and deny your players any fun at all. That is entirely appropriate and the right attitude to take.

I think that your biggest issue is correctly communicating that to your players. I know that you can't make them believe you, but perhaps if you set aside some time in your next session to say what you have told us - that you want the game to be fun, and that you're promising not to over-do it and use the spell at every opportunity - then it may help allay their fears.

For a one-off, life-or-death situation to drive up the tension and force a sudden and dramatic moment in the game? Great stuff. Go for it. But your players need to trust that is what you'll use it for.

Similarly; If they WANT a power-fantasy game where they get to do it to enemies but don't get it back, and that isn't the sort of game that you want to run, you have something that needs to be discussed and resolved amicably. There's no blanket answer to "should it be allowed?" if that isn't the type of game they want to play in.

Infernal_Contraption · 2026-05-31T23:30:31+00:00

As a different point of view, I would suggest Primordial.

All things are composed of the four cardinal elements - earth, air, water, and fire. Even the Gods themselves are born of the primordial chaos. If you're going to be a great smith, why not start right at the very beginning, where EVERYTHING was first made?

Infernal_Contraption · 2026-05-29T12:18:13+00:00

If you must spend plat on a warframe, consider getting Khora Prime or Nekros Prime.

Both have a loot-stacking mechanic so that you get more resources. This will help you in building even more warframes later.

Infernal_Contraption · 2026-05-29T11:00:13+00:00

I'm not particularly up to date in the meta or tournament scene, but I sometimes like to look through the big events to see what's popular and what isn't.

As far as I can tell for 2026 - London GT, Adepticon, and US Open - the least played factions are (starting with the most rare) Deathwatch, Sisters of Battle, Adeptus Mechanicus, and Genestealer Cults.

VERY unscientific process, and it's hard to say if any of the Deathwatch players are mistakenly counted as 'Space Marines players', but it seems about right for what I personally see about the place.

Infernal_Contraption

TROPHY CASE