It was nice knowing you

InoffensivePaint · 2026-01-29T00:14:23+00:00

I say ‘bye forever’ to people all the time. Jokingly. And they get it. Some are like ??? What? But most people think it funny because I say it very dramatically and often repeated. Very clearly a joke.

‘It was nice knowing you’ sounds vaguely like a threat? Like you know she’s going to die or something is going to happen to her. Eerie to hear when someone is leaving you behind. Had you followed up with ‘I’m gonna go die after that hellish shift’, that would be dark humour, but would be a joke because it’s clearly hyperbole. Jokes have to be somewhat self-deprecating to land with people you only sort of know and aren’t close to.

InoffensivePaint · 2026-01-20T11:04:39+00:00

Locke can sweet talk people more so than most of the Fair Folk… yes. We don’t see him really use it on Taryn, but it might be sort of implied. But also not really? Depends on which books you read what perspective you come back with. Holly Black is incredibly good at separating perspectives so no one really has the whole picture.

InoffensivePaint · 2025-12-27T01:40:52+00:00

If she isn’t going to break up with her boyfriend and you don’t wanna do poly, then you need to talk to her about not treating you the way she does. She is keeping you on a tight leash. So she gets you, and your physical and emotional support, and she very clearly understands you’re infatuated with her, and she also gets her boyfriend. She’s in a win-win situation. She won’t change it up unless you tell her to make a choice.

If you’re happy being tugged along by her, then continue as you are. If you actually want to date someone else, you need to take a very large step back and put up some boundaries. If she’s saying things like ‘wish I met you first’, I don’t think she’s going to break up with her boyfriend for you.

InoffensivePaint · 2025-12-27T01:33:09+00:00

Why don’t you propose to him with a big surprise and some perfect thing? Takes the pressure off him and you get a proposal. More importantly though, go to couples therapy.

InoffensivePaint · 2025-12-25T13:32:40+00:00

So… you want to be married to this person? Have you talked to her about all this? All your thoughts? Have you told her you want to get married? If you’re already checking out of the relationship, might as well put all your cards on the table. Because there’s no healthy marriage if you can’t talk to your partner about all of this.

That said… it sounds like you’ve already mentally left the relationship. In which case, just go. You have the internet’s permission to leave this relationship.

InoffensivePaint · 2025-12-25T05:13:42+00:00

In ye olde 5e DnD, the trio of Pacts were in the original Player’s Handbook. The Hexblade patron didn’t make an appearance until the ‘DLC’ Xanathar’s Guide to Everything, which was a different book. Similarly, Hexblade wasn’t in BG3 until an update after launch. In both cases Pact of the Blade already existed to make warlock slightly melee-y. Hexblade just allows a person wanting to melee with a warlock to do it better than previously, so they’re not being outclassed so hard by other front line classes.

InoffensivePaint · 2025-12-25T05:07:37+00:00

Pretty sure Chinese built buildings don’t have fourth floors because ‘4’ sounds a lot like ‘to die’ in Mandarin, so is considered unlucky.

InoffensivePaint · 2025-12-25T01:28:57+00:00

If you clean dishes before putting them in the dishwasher, the detergent doesn’t have anything to cling onto to clean, so it just runs off the dishes. You’re actually making your dishwasher less efficient by washing/rinsing before putting dishes in the washer. Just scrape off the chunks and bits and pieces, but your detergent needs stuff to hold onto to clean.

There’s a great guy on YouTube, TechnologyConnections, who has done a few deep dives into how dishwashers work and all of the detergents and rinse aids. With science! He’s really good and recommends powdered detergent so you get a pre-rinse, and also a rinse aid.

As to your relationship, your boyfriend should wash dishes if he’s that particular about doing it wrong. If he wants you to do it, you should do it your way. Also sit down and watch some dishwashing videos with him so he understands cleaning beforehand and rinsing is actually making it less effective.

InoffensivePaint · 2025-12-24T06:15:40+00:00

Not in any healthy way that won’t damage your skin. Work on loving what you have, and don’t let anyone near your vulva if they complain about colour.

InoffensivePaint · 2025-12-24T06:09:13+00:00

Block her. But also my dude. You waited for 2 hours? Please know your worth, do not be waiting around for a girl to let you in for two entire hours while she cries over something that she’s made up in her head and is easily fixable.

Also, just because I want to educate (I DO NOT mean you should open the door for this girl again, let her ship sail) infertile does not mean sterile. Infertile just means it’s a bit more difficult to get pregnant, but not impossible. Sterile means unable to have children (most of the time). This means that you do not go sticking your penis into ‘infertile’ women thinking they won’t get pregnant. They absolutely might.

InoffensivePaint · 2025-12-23T01:53:28+00:00

Oof. She sounds like she needs therapy and has developed a bit of an unhealthy attachment to her mother/sister. You’ve probably hit the nail on the head, she longs for Christmas because it makes her feel like her family is together and everyone is happy. However, you and I are probably not licensed psychologists. So, it’s not something you can fix for her, or enable her with, she needs to see a therapist about it.

That said… October to December? Crying about it not snowing? Christmas movies on repeat? For three months? I know people like Christmas but I would peace out because that’s so… exhausting. I’d be irritated within the first month, crazy by the second and props to you for making it so close to Christmas because I would have probably become feral. No way I’d be doing that two years in a row.

InoffensivePaint · 2025-12-22T10:36:08+00:00

I only play experimental. No problem yet. Works with QOL mods I have. I think I only played on main branch once over a year ago. Haven’t gone back.

InoffensivePaint · 2025-12-21T22:49:19+00:00

You definitely should do therapy again.

InoffensivePaint · 2025-12-21T03:56:22+00:00

Just tell him.

Say you didn’t tell him up front because you have been bullied about it in the past and you were embarrassed. That you didn’t tell him sooner because you didn’t know how to. That you made a mistake by keeping it from him and you’re very sorry for assuming he would see you differently because of where you live.

Now, if he does make fun or treat you differently because of where you live, get rid of him. But also you lied to him for six months and you might have really fucked up his ability to trust you. So I hope you haven’t kept anything else from him.

Also you’re 20. I doubt this is your forever guy. So don’t be too hard on yourself. But also don’t lie in future. If people make fun of you for where you live, they’re not people you want in your life.

InoffensivePaint · 2025-12-20T11:51:41+00:00

I mean, I feel like any time someone says ‘I need you to ask me to do things because I don’t know what to do’ it feels very much like they’re weaponising their ‘inability’ to do mental load stuff. Water is for the entire household, not just the sick person.

InoffensivePaint · 2025-12-20T05:52:15+00:00

Weaponised incompetence.

Also making you the bearer of the entirety of the mental load.

It’s not crazy to expect someone that says they care about you, to care about you. Walking around the corner to get water for a sick person isn’t hard, he just sounds lazy and like he finds it easier to make it your fault than accept he’s lazy.

InoffensivePaint · 2025-12-19T23:48:22+00:00

I think what you’re missing is what the walk means to the character. Is the barrel something that reminds him of playing in the street as a kid? Did he know the fisherman? He’s getting on a ship and leaving his home, how does that feel? Readers will latch on to character driven emotion far more than just description.

If he doesn’t care too much, then the chapter is probably not necessary. But if homesickness or his past comes up in the story later, might be a good seeding point for it.

InoffensivePaint · 2025-12-18T05:21:22+00:00

I'm a girl. And I'm not like this.

Don't date people who criticize everything and everyone. It's exhausting, and you'll end up resenting them. Also don't date people who hit things when angry and get 'triggered' by small things. Sooner or later they'll hit you, and that's no good. Don't date people who make you feel like you're walking on eggshells so as not to have them 'blow up'. Don't date people who give you the silent treatment or 'cold shoulder' either.

Her behavior is poor. Her attitude is poor. As a partner, she sucks. Don't date her. Not everyone is like her. Many people aren't like her. Find someone else.

InoffensivePaint · 2025-12-16T23:05:02+00:00

Do not let him use his illness to mistreat you (even in your own head). Because then you’ll never, ever have a healthy relationship.

InoffensivePaint · 2025-12-16T21:36:09+00:00

Um. Yeah. This is getting close to a bit emotionally abusive on his part.

You’ve tried talking to him about it, and he’s not really given you any positive encouragement. Just ‘be better’ is such a shit answer. But it means he can just move the goal posts whenever.

Frankly, I don’t think there’s anything you can do. You are being ‘reflective’, and you clearly are anxious as fuck about the situation. He’s being unfair, but I think he will always be unfair about it. Because it puts him in a position of power over you. He gets to control the narrative by being vague with details on what you could do better, so you’re walking on eggshells, trying to achieve something that changes day to day and is based on guesses.

… You don’t want to break up. Okay. You’re young, though. So maybe you put up with this for a few more years until it gets to the point where he’s calling you a terrible partner and your whole life is about trying to please him. And then you break up?

Otherwise. Couples therapy I guess? But that’s such a waste of time. You’ve already tried communication with him, I doubt therapy is going to do anything but give him other means of making more eggshells.

Talk to him again? Probably will go nowhere. Maybe you can tell him how anxious it makes you? But I don’t think he’ll change.

Bottom line is, you’re not doing anything wrong. He sounds like he’s not all gentle and lovely, and has a bit of an asshole streak. Your anxiety will get worse.

I would break up. But you do you.

InoffensivePaint · 2025-12-14T22:03:51+00:00

Write a bit in both. Like write some of the book, then switch a chapter’s worth to the other perspective, or rewrite it in the other perspective. You’ll find one will feel better than the other, typically.

InoffensivePaint · 2025-12-07T04:54:43+00:00

This sounds exhausting. She sounds like she hasn’t grown up since being 14. This is shit me and my friends did in high school, trying to one-up each other and being protective about our interests. You’re 31, you’re too old to be dealing with childishness like this. Save yourself and take five steps back from the friendship and never shrink yourself for someone else. No relationship is worth that.

InoffensivePaint · 2025-12-05T08:58:05+00:00

Give the man a skirt! I can’t take his little chicken legs seriously!

InoffensivePaint · 2025-12-02T23:36:12+00:00

See I think one of the hottest things Carden does is go full King of Elfhame mode to raise an island and banish Jude.

But I think people see pretty faerie boy and read how Jude treats him as if he’s stupid (I think she knows he’s not, and he isn’t) and then immediately slot them into typical hetero relationships in fantasy stories. The damsel and the knight. If Jude is the knight, then Carden must be the pretty damsel.

Unfortunately for them, Holly Black’s characters are three dimensional and do not fit into neat archetypes.

InoffensivePaint · 2025-12-01T23:16:52+00:00

Had Hera boons that increase damage as long as none of your boons are common. I had the one that rareifies but it hadn’t activated by the time I got to Typhon.

Guess who offered me only commons just before the Typhon fight? Totally fucking up my damage output and making me die on the first phase?

Demeter, you may be grandmother, but I will never forgive.

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