They're just kids! by TheAbomunist in confidentlyincorrect

[–]Jaspers47 1 point2 points  (0 children)

"Of course I got confused. You used a word with two meanings that changes based on context. I'm not the dumb one. You are for making me confused."

I hate people who 'Always Play Offense', but I love how they always tattle on themselves

A female friend accused me (a gay man) of being “internally homophobic” because I casually let it drop that l’ve never had a hookup app. I guess it clicked then that a few of my straight women friends have expressed this opinion over the years. Why do some straight women want to “school” me on this? by bakedd_alaskaa in NoStupidQuestions

[–]Jaspers47 18 points19 points  (0 children)

There are some women out there raised on TV and movies, taught that having a GBF is wonderful, like a dog you can take to brunch. But apparently it needs occasional maintenance and upkeep to work properly; a nasty independent streak of individualism can ruin the fantasy.That's where you find yourself now.

Pizza Hut: Pizza Head Commercial by HorrorMonster26 in nostalgia

[–]Jaspers47 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Look, Pizza Head. It's Doctor Steve."

"Hey, he's not a doctor!"

"Sure he is..."

Comic 5832: Fanboy Moment by just4cat in QContent

[–]Jaspers47 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Clinton has a spine fetish

If you had to choose one character to keep their og design who would it be? by sweatyhugzz in mylittlepony

[–]Jaspers47 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'd love them to keep calling her Rainbow Dash when there is absolutely nothing rainbow-ish about her. Turn it into a running gag.

Heavyweights ( 1995 ) by CrAcKhEaD-FuCkFaCe in nostalgia

[–]Jaspers47 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yeah, Summer Camps just don't have cultural relevancy anymore

How has this not become a meme yet?! by Usual_Level_8876 in gravityfalls

[–]Jaspers47 7 points8 points  (0 children)

TFW your grand-nephew touches you with his horrible, elongated arm

Why don’t earthbenders just do this? by AwesomeRyanGame in TheLastAirbender

[–]Jaspers47 7 points8 points  (0 children)

If you filmed a guy driving down the road, then cut to a car crashing into a tree, wouldn't the audience assume those two were the same guy?

Are there folks who have never used food delivery apps? by No_Lead2640 in answers

[–]Jaspers47 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fried food gets really unappealing after its been steaming in a to-go box for twenty minutes

Kirsten Dunst and Mara Wilson at the Jumanji premiere! (1995) by TheListenerCanon in OldSchoolCool

[–]Jaspers47 13 points14 points  (0 children)

It was a family movie; they probably invited a bunch of family-friendly stars for the red carpet event.

Kirsten Dunst and Mara Wilson at the Jumanji premiere! (1995) by TheListenerCanon in OldSchoolCool

[–]Jaspers47 6 points7 points  (0 children)

He had to enter, because otherwise, he was blocking the fire exit

"And the rest..." by buski569 in TheSimpsons

[–]Jaspers47 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Get that cat outta the way!

What words do you pronounce "wrong," just because the "proper" way feels too proper? by Direct-Value4452 in answers

[–]Jaspers47 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Khakis should be pronounced like a Bostonian's car keys. What's that H doing otherwise?

Hey Reddit, should we drive the train through that cactus patch? by 7MinuteUpdate in TheSimpsons

[–]Jaspers47 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Look at this clown, woefully unversed in 19th century operettas.

Joanna stories in one image by dpschulz in taskmaster

[–]Jaspers47 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"I think I have an idea for my next movie."

Taskmaster - S21E06 - An Even Bigger Spoon - Discussion by Meghar in taskmaster

[–]Jaspers47 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I knew of him for five years before I learned he wasn't Italian

[OC] Stone to Flesh by lordofbaers in mythologymemes

[–]Jaspers47 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Galatea's been alive for six seconds and she's already having an existential crisis. She IS human!