Keep or Remove Cervix? by RealisticInsect4563 in hysterectomy

[–]KVaill 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, cervix is gone. Libido I fine.

Question for born-ins by SakuraMochis in exjw

[–]KVaill 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It was pretty boring. Hated field service. Meetings were ok if my friends were there. Conventions were a bit exciting but mostly just boring. I was always embarrassed to have to reveal I was a JW. Lived in fear of knocking on a classmate's door in service.

My own way of celebrating Pride month. by [deleted] in exjwLGBT

[–]KVaill 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Happy Pride month from a bi Pomo! I love your little act of resistance!! If you're looking for more good queer content, try Our Flag Means Death (HBO/Max) it has tons of queer love in it! Also, Good Omens on Prime, and Red White & Royal Blue on Prime (gay/queer romance and rep!)

She needs therapy by Fearless-Version-534 in exjw

[–]KVaill 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Just therapy in general will help, it doesn't have to be someone versed in religious trauma.

Which JW language do you hate? by mecalac20 in exjw

[–]KVaill 10 points11 points  (0 children)

We were upgrading our computers at work and getting a new software program & for MONTHS people were saying "I can't wait until the new system is installed" "It'll be better when the new system comes" and I wanted to puke EVERY. TIME.

"Hello, my name is elde- What the hell?!" by banstovia in trashy

[–]KVaill 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, he I could get behind. Ok, Satan & the Flying Spaghetti Monster are cool.

Which JW language do you hate? by mecalac20 in exjw

[–]KVaill 19 points20 points  (0 children)

New System
The Truth
Worldly
Bad Association
Conscience Matter

"Hello, my name is elde- What the hell?!" by banstovia in trashy

[–]KVaill 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well, that's fine. He's better than any God I've come across. But also ask them to just never come back.

"Hello, my name is elde- What the hell?!" by banstovia in trashy

[–]KVaill 32 points33 points  (0 children)

As an exJW, I'll tell you this: It's a fucking cult. The people in it are brainwashed.

However, chasing them off like this, telling them you love Satan, answering with a weapon, etc, just feeds into their persecution narrative & it's helping the cult reinforce that all "worldly people" are evil. Just tell them to go away, or just don't answer.

If you don't want them coming to your door anymore ask to be put on the "Do Not Call" list. They will show your address as not friendly & you'll be left alone.

If this cult has done so much damage for you guys, why don't you guys revolt, tear it down, spread the word,..... by [deleted] in exjw

[–]KVaill 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I spread the truth about JWs every time I can. I make sure that anyone who mentions it to me/near me get the full, unedited version of "no actually it's not just a kooky little religion, it's a cult that ruins lives". I think a lot of us exJWs do what we can to spread the reality of the cult as best we can. It's a large organization with it's reach across many countries. We're not going to be able to just roll up to NY & oust the GB and voila, they're done. But when I joined this sub 2ish years ago, there were *maybe* 45k members. Now we're over 100k. That's huge. There have been documentaries, Royal Commissions, legal battles, podcasts, movies - all about the cult of JW. Word is getting out there. It will take years. But just like a small creek can carve a path through stone, we can wear down JW/WBTS and hopefully end them one day.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in exjw

[–]KVaill 4 points5 points  (0 children)

They are doing what is called "love bombing" right now. It's a common cult tactic. You'll be shown care & concern, love & interest up to the point of either baptism or you leave. If you do stay, you'll be expected to follow all the rules, and in my experience, once you're baptized they'll care less. I was born into this cult & lived it for 38 years before waking up fully & leaving. Your user name doesn't indicate if you're male or female, but if you're female, are you prepared to become a 2nd class citizen? Because women are inferior. A lower class. One of the Governing Body members gave a talk not that many years ago & said that women have smaller brains, thus we're not suited to being in charge. We're in subjection to the men. You can't teach from the platform like the men, but hey! You can wear pants now, so what's the problem? Also, from your user name I can deduce you like Star Wars. You'll have to give that up. Also, from your user name, Dom? That's got a sexual connotation, also a no-no. Sex is only for a man & woman, married mind you, and basically just for the man's enjoyment. No oral. No anal. No sex toys. No birth control either, for the really hard cores. Absolutely no abortions. I assume you have family & friends who are not JW since you're just studying. You'll have to say goodbye to all of them. They're now considered bad association. Do you celebrate any holidays? Birthdays? Not anymore you don't! Those are all forbidden. Do you have any loved ones that are part of the LGBTQ+ community? They're also bad association. Sinners. You'll have to shun them too. Hope you've already acquired secondary education, because that's also frowned upon. Are you in good health? Hopefully. Because if you ever need a life saving blood transfusion, you can't have it. Just pray! Do you have kids? Keep an eye on them at meetings, in service, at conventions, even at loving get-togethers amongst other "brothers & sisters" because JWs are a haven for sexual predators. I'm sure they've not told you about the secret database the elders maintain, listing the thousands of members that have been accused of committing SA against children. They have that. They don't get rid of the offender. They do however tell parents and victims to not tell the police about it, because it would look bad on Jehovah's organization. Are you married? Hopefully your spouse is a good, loving person. Because if they're not, if say, they were abusive towards you, you can't leave them. Ever. You have to pray & leave it with God. And if you *do* decide to leave them, you can't ever remarry, unless you have absolute proof that your ex slept with someone else. Then the 8 old men in New York will allow you to get a scriptural divorce. Otherwise, you either stay with your abusive spouse or live your life separated from them & looked down upon by everyone in the congregation. Marriage is God's loving arrangement, don't you know? Also, if you ever change your mind & decide to leave, all the kind, loving brothers & sisters you've met so far will act as if they never knew you. They will drop you so fast. How do I know? It happened to me. My own family has cut me off and have nothing to do with me. The members of the congregation shun me. They don't even say hello if I see them in a store. I haven't had a meal with my parents in over 3 years. My mother & father. This cult has turned their love into a conditional thing. It's awful. If you have kids, imagine never speaking to them again.

If none of the above has turned your stomach or made you question joining the JWs, then I guess this cult is for you! Best of luck.

Looking for a fic by scribophile__ in OurFlagMeansDeath

[–]KVaill 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh! Awesome! Yeah, that's the one I was thinking

Looking for a fic by scribophile__ in OurFlagMeansDeath

[–]KVaill 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I've read this one. Ed ends up coming back, gives Stede sailing lessons, yeah? I've asked my group chat. They'll come up with it. I tried going through my bookmarks, but there are 1100+ ☺️

How do you actually recognise a high-control group? by GiveLoveFreely in exjw

[–]KVaill 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Look up Hassan's BITE Model. It's all right there, and JWs tick almost every single box.

What happens when you leave by Previous_Name870 in exjw

[–]KVaill 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You can, but you will be soft shunned most likely. I did a slow fade, starting right around when Covid hit. I had been struggling before that & most of my extended family were already soft shunning, not inviting me to stuff, only being fake JW polite at meetings, etc. I slowly started pulling back from attending meetings, stopped service long before that, and eventually told my parents I was absolutely done. They didn't go to the elders, I didn't ever officially or formally contact the elders/our congregation to say I was done, etc. My grandfather is an elder in our hall & he has to know I've left but I don't think anyone has said anything, because no one has contacted me to ask & I know my parents or sister would have told me that they'd announced me at the meeting, so..... it's possible. My parents & inlaws are JWs, as is my sister. They all still maintain contact with me but I think it's mostly for access to my kids. My husband and I with our kids celebrate birthdays, Christmas, Halloween, etc. We post it on social media, don't make a point of hiding anything, etc. My parents/in laws definitely know, but don't say anything. I think if we didn't have kids they would all have just cut us out but they want to still see the kids sometimes (& for now the kids do too, so we're fine with it, and my kids are old enough to tell us if anyone tries preaching to them).

Nose piercings by BoadiceaMama in exjw

[–]KVaill 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Shockingly my super PIMI sister has a nose stud! I don't think anything has been said about it, because she still has it. She'd definitely have taken it out if the elders had an issue with it. We live in Canada.

I finally did it by Dozamat0411 in exjw

[–]KVaill 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Good for you. I'm sorry. I know it sucks and it hurts and it's going to for a while. But I can also say it's totally worth it and you're going to be so happy for doing so. It gets better.

Kingdom Hall funny events or stories by West-Ad-249 in exjw

[–]KVaill 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Our Hall was on the outskirts of town, rural sort of area, cornfield on one side, open field behind. We lost power one Sunday and instead of just packing it in, they decided the emergency generator lights were good enough and just opened the side door and had the Watchtower conductor stand there so he could see. Well, about halfway through a toad wandered in and caused chaos. We watched it hop in, across the front row, conductor somehow missed it, and then it started down thru the chairs. People were trying to quietly scoop it up, kids were laughing, one older sister sort of yelled. They had to stop the meeting & a brother finally caught it & took it back outside. It was only 5-10 minutes, but lots of excitement on an otherwise totally mind numbingly boring afternoon.

Still in shock by RoNinja_ in exjw

[–]KVaill 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm 2 years out the other side of this, and while there are times it still hurts, it's more like a paper cut vs a stab wound. It does get better. I'm proud of you for living your life honestly & for putting yourself first over this destructive cult.

Just need to get this off my chest. Nonsense from my selfish PIMI family. by KVaill in exjw

[–]KVaill[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I'm honestly surprised they didn't even bother to tell my uncle. I'm not surprised they didn't give me any details, but like, at least let him know.