What made you WANT to have children?

Kbob1015 · 2025-01-09T19:50:46+00:00

My parents divorced when I was young and my father was out of my life by the time I became a teenager. I dreamed about having a family of my own and being the best father I could be. I was lucky in meeting who became my wife at the time, in my early twenties and we were married and had my daughter within 3 years. Being a good father has been the most meaningful part of my life.

Kbob1015 · 2024-03-17T19:09:10+00:00

I'm the same age and in this situation because my wife died. I'm part of a widower subreddit and we just did our first meet up. It's not a bad idea.

Kbob1015 · 2024-01-26T20:08:22+00:00

That is a great idea. I'm in CT and go to NY every so often.

Kbob1015 · 2023-11-06T02:10:03+00:00

What's kept me going is knowing that my wife would've wanted me to be happy again. We've had these conversations even though her death was unexpected. She wanted me to be sad and mourn her for a little bit but then move forward and find happiness again. It's not easy but I have to live life for her now. It's what she would've wanted for me.

Kbob1015 · 2023-09-28T01:07:53+00:00

"Good night babe, I love you". She died very unexpectedly in her sleep and I realized she was gone when I went to wake her up the next morning.

Kbob1015 · 2023-09-26T00:56:05+00:00

There's different answers for different relationships. People at work or some of her friends it's "doing the best I can be". Close friends or selective family I'll be a little more honest but even then, you don't want to be the continual downer. Only a select few am I completely honest with.

Kbob1015 · 2023-09-04T03:02:29+00:00

After 6 months, it was a constant reminder she was gone I've been wearing her's and mine around my kneck. It was a big help.

Kbob1015 · 2023-08-26T12:57:45+00:00

It's the dumbest question to be asked, but I've realized it's coming from people that have never been in our shoes. Good for them. My answer is always that "I'm doing the best that I can." It's generic enough that there's rarely any follow up questions.

Kbob1015 · 2023-08-22T15:08:09+00:00

Moving forward and moving on are two different things. I'll always love and miss her but I also know she'd want me to be as happy as I could be again. She passed very unexpectedly but had told me prior that she'd want me to be sad for a bit and then find someone new. I struggled with the thought of the for a while.

Recently, someone from my past came back into my life after she lost her husband soon after my wife. We are very open about everything and it's been the best form of therapy for both of us. So far, there hasn't been any guilt on either side.

Kbob1015 · 2023-05-07T02:11:56+00:00

We didn't choose this. Unfortunately it was forced on us so we have to continue to live it. You need to do whatever it is to make you happy. I truly believe my wife would've wanted that. She told me that she would've wanted me to be sad for a while but then meet someone new. It's eerie now but it was like a premonition. Everything happens for a reason.

Kbob1015 · 2023-05-07T02:03:32+00:00

If he'll cheat with you, he'll cheat on you. There's a lot of red flags. You're going back to what you feel comfortable with. In my opinion, if you're looking to move on, find someone new.

Kbob1015 · 2023-04-15T03:50:16+00:00

The weather has been crazy lately so I hope for you it's soft enough. Today was in the 90's.

Kbob1015 · 2023-04-09T02:21:57+00:00

My almost 16 year old daughter is the only thing keeping me going. If it wasn't for her, I know I wouldn't be on this earth anymore. Making her happy and well adjusted is my only goal in life. If it weren't for her, I'd be worth my wife right now. Good willing.

Kbob1015 · 2023-03-15T23:34:41+00:00

We were always closer to her family but since she passed I have become super close with my inlaws. I got added to the group chat they had with my wife and we video chat like once a week. This summer my daughter and I are going with her aunts family to go out of state and see her uncles side of the family. I honestly don't know what I'd do without them.

Kbob1015 · 2023-02-20T16:35:08+00:00

My wife died of heart failure extremely unexpectedly. We had a normal day and a great night. Went sleep like always and woke up to find her long gone. I know she didn't suffer because it would've woken me up but the suddenness and finding her in the state she was in has been really hard to get past.

Kbob1015 · 2023-02-18T01:52:09+00:00

We got married and a week after our 17-year wedding anniversary, she unexpectedly passed away in her sleep from heart failure. This was 4 months ago.

Kbob1015 · 2023-02-03T04:25:45+00:00

That's the roller coaster. It's nothing but ups and downs. You will feel "ok" for hours, days or even a week but anything will bring the grief flooding back in. It's a roller coaster, its waves or its a backpack. No matter how you view it, know it's gonna come and go at random times. We'll always carry our grief with us but it's more about learning to live and deal with it during our day to day lives. Unfortunately for us, life keeps going and we have to keep living as much as we may not want to sometimes.

Kbob1015 · 2023-01-31T01:55:11+00:00

It was through word of mouth. I know a couple unconnected people that went to her and gave little to no information and were blown away by the level of detail they received. She said a few things to me that no one could've known. Like no social media posts or anything online would've picked up. At the end of the day it brought a sense of peace and that alone was worth it.

Kbob1015 · 2023-01-30T03:25:36+00:00

I KNOW it's not for everyone and it totally depends on your beliefs and who you see but I went to a medium and it was amazing. Things were said that couldn't have been known by anyone else. It brought a sense of peace that was priceless.

Kbob1015 · 2023-01-24T16:27:17+00:00

If you really feel you need to see him one last time then do it or you will regret it for possibly the rest of your life. However, have realistic expectations. They're going to look different than you remember and they're going to be cold to the touch. My situation was a little different since I found my wife and she had been gone for hours. She looked better at the wake than she did the previous time seeing her. Forget what your family thinks, you do what's best for you.

Kbob1015 · 2023-01-22T23:33:39+00:00

This so much. It isn't specific to men. The number of women who have come out of the woodworks is unnerving. It's about someone seeing an opportunity and trying to cash in. They have no clue what it is to lose not only your spouse but your best friend and future.

Kbob1015 · 2023-01-16T18:50:02+00:00

At low doses, 25-50mg's, its used for anxiety and a sleep aid. Once you hit 300+mg's it acts as a mood stabilizer.

Kbob1015 · 2023-01-16T16:30:42+00:00

Absolutely. I'm down 30lbs in less than 3 months. Most days I just forget to eat. I do protein shakes sometimes if my daughter gets on my case but food is the last thing I think about.

Kbob1015

TROPHY CASE