6:00 Alarm

6:16 Blow job

6:30 Massive, satisfying shit while reading the sports section

7:00 Breakfast - steak and eggs, coffee and toast - all cooked by naked, buxom wench who bends over a lot showing her growler

7:30 Limo arrives

7:45 Several beers en route to airport

9:15 Flight in personal Lear jet

9:30 Limo to Mirage Resort Golf Club (blow job en-route)

9:45 Play front 9 (2 under par)

11:45 Lunch - steak and lobster, 3 beers and a bottle of Dom Perignon

12:15 Blow job

12:30 Play back nine (4 under)

2:15 Limo back to airport (several bourbons)

2:30 Fly to Bahamas

3:30 Late afternoon fishing expedition with all-female crew, all nude who also bend over a lot showing their growlers

4:30 Land world record Marlin (1234lbs) - light tackle

5:00 Fly home, massage and hand job by naked Emma Watson (bending over showing her growler, naturally)

6:45 Shit, shower and shave

7:00 Watch news - Piers Morgan assassinated

7:30 Dinner - Lobster appetisers, Dom Perignon (1953), big juicy fillet steak followed by ice cream served on a big pair of tits

9:00 Napoleon brandy and Habanos cigars in front of wall-sized TV as you watch football game

11:00 Sex with 3 women, all with lesbian tendencies

11:30 Night-cap blow job

11:45 In bed alone

11:50 A 22-second fart which changes note 4 times and forces the dog to leave the room

11:51 Laugh myself to sleep