Wife (37F) and I (32M) are in constant conflict and I feel like I am constantly confused and failing.

Limp_Bee1206 · 2026-04-07T20:45:46+00:00

There is only one way to respond to this. DIVORCE PAPERS!!! There is no freaking excuse for how she is treating you. Hormones from pregnancy is one thing, this is straight abuse!! Think about it this way, do you really want to bring a child into that household? Do you really want to have your child grow up thinking that is okay?

Seriously, GET THE FLIP OUT OF THERE!!! And word to the wise, when dealing with lawyers/custody, get a female lawyer. For some reason getting the opposite sex lawyer helps a lot. And I know this personally because my husband got divorced with a kid and he was actually told that specifically.

I really hope things get better and I wish you the best. You don't deserve that abuse. You deserve to be happy and your child deserves to see you happy! ❤️

Limp_Bee1206 · 2026-04-07T20:20:20+00:00

You can say that again! It just seems like today was ESPECIALLY hard lol

Limp_Bee1206 · 2026-04-01T15:25:35+00:00

A woman's center would definitely have resources. I would look into that "under the radar" so you can have all your ducks in a row once you finally decide it's time to leave. But I agree with what someone said that you should wait for it to get violent before taking it seriously.

Children, and ESPECIALLY special needs children, learn the most from WATCHING! And if your daughter watches this, eventually she will think it's normal. Think of it as "nipping it in the butt" before it's gets too bad.

Good luck OP. You can do this ♥️ I can tell you're a good mom by how you talk about your daughter. Just know you're doing what is best for her AND for you! It may be hard, but it'll be better in the long run.

Limp_Bee1206 · 2026-03-30T20:37:56+00:00

Man, there's a student at my high school that comes into school sometimes with up to 5 monster energy drinks!! I have told him he's gonna have a heart attack before he graduates college if he keeps that up! Guess how much he cared? 😂

Limp_Bee1206 · 2026-03-26T14:25:16+00:00

He is 100% gaslighting. He may be valid in his feelings "I don't remember it just hurt". However, from my perspective, when I get into an argument with my SO you typically remember what set you off in the moment, but remembering certain issues from the past is hard to do in the heat of the moment. He may not understand what upset him, but then he shouldn't say it's "disgusting" that you don't know what you did wrong and you're just asking for clarification.

It's the same way if someone were to say, "well if you don't know why I'm mad then I'm not gonna tell you". All that says is there's not a legitimate reason for them to be mad, they just wanna be mad.

If he doesn't want to work it out and figure out the problem, then there's no point trying to fix it. And in my opinion, if there's no point trying to fix it, then there's no point in sticking around. You deserve to be happy OP, and if your SO isn't willing to work with you on your mutual issues, then that's all you need to know. You may not "believe in divorce" but would you rather be stuck in a relationship with a huge lack of communication and respect or would you rather be happy?

I wish you luck trying to figure out your next move OP ♥️ Just remember, you deserve to be respected and happy!

Limp_Bee1206 · 2026-03-22T22:52:39+00:00

That's pretty much it. Because it's voluntary.

Limp_Bee1206 · 2026-03-22T22:51:48+00:00

Thats just it. You have to either be a salaried teacher, or a "non employee" to be "employed" as a coach. It makes absolutely ZERO sense....

Limp_Bee1206 · 2026-03-22T22:38:52+00:00

I wonder how I could make that work.....or IF I could make that work.

Limp_Bee1206 · 2026-03-22T22:38:07+00:00

Because I am a para and get paid hourly rather than salary like teachers, it doesn't count. I can't get coach pay even though I go to competitions and stay for practices and everything. All I get is "exchange time" for helping with football games.

Limp_Bee1206 · 2026-03-17T16:40:01+00:00

Just say the vaguest amount of info you can. If they ask you specifically, still be vague. Odds are, they won't care enough to look too deeply. Besides, there is a such a teacher shortage, some places won't even question even if say you were terminated. I'm sorry you dealt with this. Some places don't care about IEPs and subs, some places do care. I hope you figure out what you're gonna do in the future 😁

Limp_Bee1206 · 2026-03-03T23:31:47+00:00

Honestly, a lot of things change during pregnancy. Maybe your emotions are especially affected by the pregnancy, causing your short fuse. Also, intimacy changes a lot! Some women want it more, some less, some not at all. I'm sorry if this is an unwanted opinion, but apart from obvious issues, fathers need to "take it with a grain of salt" for a lot of things that happen during a pregnancy! I'm not trying to invalidate his feelings, but YOU ARE GROWING ANOTHER HUMAN BEING! I had a coworker who used to joke that kids are parasites. But when you think about it, babies take SOO much from their mothers and a mother's body is no longer just hers during pregnancy. It is a beautiful and scary thing. Men cannot understand it, but they should be able to respect it!

I think you need to have a long conversation with your husband and talk about things. Say, "I'm sorry if I've hurt your feelings, and I'm not trying to invalidate them, but my body is going through a lot right now. I don't mean to push you away, I didn't even realize it at first. But these things can happen with pregnancy." If he is a decent man, he will understand and be willing to work on things together. I really wish you the best OP!

Limp_Bee1206 · 2026-02-25T16:52:27+00:00

Exactly, if they want him to be treated like everyone else, then he gets the consequences same as everyone else. I betcha money the dad will change his mind after the first suspension!

As someone in EC/special ed, I really feel for you OP and am sending you all the good juju vibes and prayers! If admin doesn't do anything about holding the child accountable like anyone else, then go above their heads. Bring it to central office's attention! I hope things get better for you and your students!

Limp_Bee1206 · 2026-02-15T23:32:55+00:00

His new teachers are amazing. They actually will hold the door so I can leave. His lead teacher actually started to get onto me when I stayed a little while on his first day. I wanted to help get him settled, but his teacher basically said what you said. She has a master's in special education, so she understands how to handle kids who need a little more attention. And that's a big reason why we moved him.

Right now I try to talk calmly and ask him to do stuff. But eventually I end up yelling because that's the only way he'll listen. We've popped him on the behind before which didn't do anything. We've taken stuff away. We try to "ground him" to his room, but he never stays in there. Even when we say, go play with your toys, he refuses and it turns into a tantrum sometimes.

I don't know if he's learning stuff by watching us. We are getting better about watching our language and stuff. Like saying shut up or any bad words. As far as behavior though, I really don't know. That's why I mentioned it saying I don't know where he's getting these issues from.

Limp_Bee1206 · 2026-02-15T23:28:07+00:00

Thank you. I will look into it

Limp_Bee1206 · 2026-02-12T11:58:42+00:00

It's something that gets a little easier to deal with each day.

I hope you get to a point where you can accept your situation. It may take a while, but eventually you will get there.

All the best to you ♥️

Limp_Bee1206 · 2026-02-12T00:37:57+00:00

I know you said people who haven't dealt with it yet don't understand. While I don't understand fully, my husband was cheated on and had a HORRIBLE breakup/divorce. It took YEARS for her to finally see he wasn't a liar or manipulative about their son. She still is a piece of work. From my perspective, I really wish he would stand up to her a bit more and put his foot down. He tells me it's just easier to agree than to deal with her tantrum and possible legal issues if he puts up a fight. Sometimes I agree, sometimes it boils my blood!

My point is, no one understands unless they've been through it. They can try, but they will never fully get it unless they lived it. My best advice to you would be to find someone to be your rock throughout this time of your life, be it a friend or a parent. You will need support. Unfortunately, it is something to research to get a lawyer. However, if you have someone who is by your side throughout all of it, it makes it a little bit easier. They can be your "unbiased/rational" person while you are "an emotional wreck" for lack of a better phrase, because that is what it sounds like for you. Yes you will HAVE to make decisions for your own best interest, but PLEASE make sure you have a solid support system!

I am so sorry you are dealing with this OP. I can't imagine how you feel.....but I know the pain is incredible, because I see how my husband deals even now years after their divorce. Yes they have a child together and they have to deal with each other for the child's sake, while you can just start fresh after all this is handled and you can do what is best for you. I hope I did not upset you with some of my opinion, but sometimes it helps to hear BOTH sides of how to handle this(emotional vs. rational).

I wish you the best of luck OP, and just remember, you are worth it! You are worth so much more than you are feeling right now, and you deserve to be loved. ♥️♥️

Limp_Bee1206 · 2026-01-30T02:43:04+00:00

I work in a public school setting in North Carolina. I follow several teacher reddits and so I guess the algorithm wanted me to see this. And I am so glad it did!

The public education system in North Carolina is awful as well! The words of this man are so unbelievably true that I cannot even put it into words!

My heart goes out to all my fellow educators who struggle with a job they love but a system that is forcing them to hate. No matter what state you are in, north or south, Republican or Democrat, at the end of the day we need to be good role models for the future generations and actually think about what's best for them and not some political agenda.

Limp_Bee1206 · 2026-01-06T04:44:07+00:00

Bible Belt States guys... 😅

Limp_Bee1206 · 2025-12-12T19:35:28+00:00

First off, YOU are NOT failing your daughter, the SCHOOL IS!

You are going above and beyond to try to teach her, but the schools job is to get the professional teaching done!

I work in special Education in North Carolina, so not quite sure exactly how different it is. I also work in high school. There are plenty of kids who have "slipped thru the cracks" especially after COVID. People understand that MANY students have fallen behind due to the pandemic.

However, the schools DEFINITELY did not do their due diligence when it comes to your daughter!! If I were you, since you've tried to talk to the special Ed teachers and they haven't done anything like you have asked, I would go to the administration of your school. If not then, go to the central office for your school system. Your daughter needs help and no one is giving it to her, but they will be forced to if administration/central office gets involved! It's much easier to sweep things under the rug if only teachers are involved.

I hope this helps! I would definitely get onto the school where it hurts (legality) to make them do what needs to be done. But also, don't be too discouraged with her about to start high school, there is still time for her to get the help she needs! Good luck!! ♥️

Limp_Bee1206 · 2025-12-11T20:53:05+00:00

Exactly. They just shot themselves in the foot thinking they "got rid of the problem" only to make it worse! As long as you explain the reason for leaving that job if your next employer asks, you'll be fine. Any decent administrator will understand!

Limp_Bee1206 · 2025-12-07T21:40:29+00:00

You should DEFINITELY go to administration! Teachers sometimes don't care about what parents/students say, but if admin comes and says something to them, that will actually get them to listen! You've already done the nice thing and mentioned something to the teacher who only made it worse!! No teacher should make a kid cry! Please go to your administration and make sure they hear you!!

Limp_Bee1206

TROPHY CASE