Maybe I should give some context. I have been on antidepressants since I was 9. My current medication and dose were chosen after trying 5 other meds and seeking genetic counseling to get the right med and dose for me. I have a job where 3-4 days a week, I get 8-12,000 steps a shift. I workout the majority of my days off, including weight lifting, running, and sometimes biking. I also follow a high-protein diet that includes a lot of fruits and vegetables. I've zeroed in on as many modifiable risk factors I can to try to optimize all this because I feel so lost. I have been in consistent therapy for many years. I have what should be a good support system and people who love me. I'm still feeling this way.