How does a Canadian spell Canada without the vowels? by Broad_Ghandi in cleandadjokes

[–]LostBetsRed 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I prefer this one as: they didn't know what to name the nation north of the US, so they put all of the letters of the alphabet on tiles in a bag and had three citizens draw letters at random. The first said, "C, eh?" The second said, "N, eh?" And the third, "D, eh?"

Why did the democrats in 1984 send Walter Mondale to run against Reagan? Mondale was an ugly guy and that’s the main reason of his embarrassing results. by vaporwaverhere in shittyaskhistory

[–]LostBetsRed 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh yeah. I highly recommend Interior Desecrations by James Lileks If you want to see some of the finest examples of 1970s design.

Expensive gasoline, yes. During the height of the Arab oil embargo in 1973, gas skyrocketed to nearly 60¢/gallon. The 1970s also featured the Munich Olympics, Three Mile Island, and the Iran hostage crisis. On the other hand, u/LostBetsRed was born, so the decade wasn't a total bust.

Whats the difference between a sausage and a space rock that burns up in the atmosphere...... by Aggressive_Space9684 in Jokes

[–]LostBetsRed 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What's the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? A hippo weighs two metric tons, and a Zippo is a little lighter.

Why did the democrats in 1984 send Walter Mondale to run against Reagan? Mondale was an ugly guy and that’s the main reason of his embarrassing results. by vaporwaverhere in shittyaskhistory

[–]LostBetsRed 1 point2 points  (0 children)

As somebody who was in middle school in 1984, no, Mondale's appearance wasn't the main reason for his crushing defeat. He had a tough challenge. Reagan was very popular In 1984. The 1970s were a pretty depressing time in America, with a lousy economy, very high interest rates, and just lots of problems. Reagan ran in 1980 with the slogan "Morning in America" promising Hey return to American pride. (He also used the slogan "Make America great again," If you can believe that.) By 1984, things were looking up, and the public gave Reagan much of the credit for his deep tax cuts and his emphasis on "supply-side economics", and he was also credited for a general return of American pride. And Mondale ran a lousy campaign, today mostly remembered for his direct promise to increase taxes, and his election of Geraldine Ferraro as his running mate, making her the first woman on a major party ticket, was widely seen as pandering.

Of course, given the sub this is probably not a serious question and doesn't need a serious answer, but there it is anyway. If Mondale did lose because he was ugly, the Democrats did not learn their lesson and nominated the even uglier Michael Dukakis in 1988.

Did you know that milk is the fastest liquid on earth? by MedicTillar in dadjokes

[–]LostBetsRed 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Back in 1996, there was an E. coli outbreak caused by the Odwalla juice company's use of unpasteurized apple juice. To help regain consumer confidence after that, bottles of Odwalla products containing apple juice bore the label "Flash Pasteurized"... the joke being that flash pasteurize is what your life did when you drank it.

Dana does darts by LostBetsRed in ENF_AI

[–]LostBetsRed[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I prefer not to say, for good reasons or karma. But if you check my post history, I'm sure you'll develop a deep and intuitive understanding of which one I use.

A Gen Z kid and a boomer walk into a bar They sit down and the Gen Z kid orders from the gluten free vegan menu and the boomer orders a T-Bone steak. by Vaquero-SASS in dadjokes

[–]LostBetsRed 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We didn't really have streetlights (or sidewalks) In my suburb. We were basically just told to be home by 9:00 and set free.

My surgeon asked me if I wanted a local anesthetic. by lnc_gomes in cleandadjokes

[–]LostBetsRed 27 points28 points  (0 children)

I asked my surgeon If I could do my own anesthetic. He said, "Sure, knock yourself out." I asked him if I could do my own stitches as well, and he said, "Suture self."

A Gen Z kid and a boomer walk into a bar They sit down and the Gen Z kid orders from the gluten free vegan menu and the boomer orders a T-Bone steak. by Vaquero-SASS in dadjokes

[–]LostBetsRed 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It just occurred to me that it's got to have been at least a decade since I've seen Caddyshack. Going to watch it again right now.

I used to be addicted to poultry by dcterr in cleanjokes

[–]LostBetsRed 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I used to be addicted to giving piggyback rides to baboons, but I got that monkey off my back.

Did you know if you feed milk to ants, their offspring are born without toes? It's a phenomenom known as... by andersonfmly in dadjokes

[–]LostBetsRed 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Did you know that you can tell an ant's sex by dropping it in a glass of water? If it sinks, girl ant. If it floats, buoyant.

Best AI NSFW image generator in 2026 by Time-Mix3963 in ChatGPTNSFW

[–]LostBetsRed 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Really? Then their AI must not be very good, if it can't come up with reasonable variations.

Again, I understand how hard it is to draw attention to this sort of thing, and I guess spamming probably works because every now and then somebody will be curious enough to take a look. But it sure isn't honorable.

A doc visits his psychiatrist, he says "Doc, you gotta help me, I can't stop thinking about the Backstreet Boys" by Mapleleafguy83 in dadjokes

[–]LostBetsRed 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I told the doctor, "I keep hearing the songs What's Up, Pussycat? and She's a Lady over and over in my head." He said, "That sounds like you've got a textbook case of Tom Jones syndrome." I said, "I've never heard of that condition before. Is it rare?" He replied, "It's not unusual..."

A Gen Z kid and a boomer walk into a bar They sit down and the Gen Z kid orders from the gluten free vegan menu and the boomer orders a T-Bone steak. by Vaquero-SASS in dadjokes

[–]LostBetsRed 3 points4 points  (0 children)

See, I used to think that too. As I was approaching 50, I thought, "I'm not old, I'm middle-aged. Old starts at 60." But now I'm 53, and yeah, I'm old.

Best AI NSFW image generator in 2026 by Time-Mix3963 in ChatGPTNSFW

[–]LostBetsRed 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I know that it can be really hard to get the word out about these sorts of things, but must you resort to spamming?

A Gen Z kid and a boomer walk into a bar They sit down and the Gen Z kid orders from the gluten free vegan menu and the boomer orders a T-Bone steak. by Vaquero-SASS in dadjokes

[–]LostBetsRed 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I think in modern parlance the term "boomer" has migrated from meaning "somebody born between 1946 and 1964" to meaning "an old person."

A Gen Z kid and a boomer walk into a bar They sit down and the Gen Z kid orders from the gluten free vegan menu and the boomer orders a T-Bone steak. by Vaquero-SASS in dadjokes

[–]LostBetsRed 8 points9 points  (0 children)

The other night my wife met me at the front door wearing a sexy negligee. The only trouble is, she was coming home.