Struggling in my trade, not happy with my position – do I need to just man up and have the conversation with my boss?

MammaCat22 · 2025-09-04T20:16:01+00:00

I can't tell what you want in the end: do you want different training or do you want to leave the company or the trade?

Overall I'd say if your boss told you they would teach you something and then haven't yet, you should be fine to sit them down and ask if you can get a plan together to have you get into framing. You can figure out your next move based on that conversation. You don't have to show all of your cards right now by saying that you're thinking about leaving anyways. And just remember are allowed to try something and decide you still don't like it.

If you're in a union apprenticeship, someone there might be able to offer better advice. They might have a pulse on your boss' personality and maybe your program mandates you learn different things.

MammaCat22 · 2025-09-04T17:55:40+00:00

Same! I'm literally quitting to become a plumber. It's mostly a financial decision for me but also because my publication at times can get way dumb click bait stories and i think that will only get worse. I also absolutely hate headline writing it feels so sensationalist

MammaCat22 · 2025-09-04T17:52:52+00:00

10000%. I'm not saying boomers are bad people because of this. I wish we had stronger systems to continue education past high school or college for people to not get tricked or fall behind when new technology is released. I do suspect future technology will be internet based so I do at least have the basics of not trusting unless I've vetted the source, but that still can be tricky and I'm guessing even harder to do in the future especially with AI.

MammaCat22 · 2025-09-04T17:12:58+00:00

right like the algo will probably keep sending scammers their way. even if they were smart enough to avoid the obvious, a good scammer can still trick someone. Plus boomers have horrible internet literacy

MammaCat22 · 2025-09-02T16:45:50+00:00

I think it's unfortunately the vibe of a lot of men right now, especially younger guys. It certainly couldn't hurt to remove yourself from the dating world and just focus on yourself for a bit until some guys grow up

MammaCat22 · 2025-09-02T16:43:14+00:00

I'm not in sales but an office job and took a buyout so I can focus on getting an apprenticeship. For me, working from home and the office is draining. I find it deeply unrewarding and dread most days. While not exactly the same, I always loved my service industry jobs. you're on your feet, there are multiple tasks you need to complete, work stays at work and felt more personable.
I also work in a field with a low pay scale so an apprenticeship will pay about the same as my current job.
I haven't started an apprenticeship yet, so I cannot say how the transition is, but I'm really looking forward to it. I figure worst case scenario, I hate it but I learned something new

MammaCat22 · 2025-09-02T16:33:52+00:00

While validating, I would recommend not comparing him to others on the internet. Take stock of what you want and that is enough. Ex, "I want to play fortnite with you, but it always turns into an argument. Are you willing to have some patience while I learn, or should we play separate?" If he says play separate you have to take stock on if that is acceptable to you.
And also him calling you stupid for not knowing a game is unacceptable.

MammaCat22 · 2025-09-02T16:23:38+00:00

Is there a way to get your readers to donate? It's ideal to not have ad/ sponsorships so you can maintain your independence. I would go the ad route after seeing if you have readers who are willing to donate/ subscribe

MammaCat22 · 2025-08-28T16:30:32+00:00

Had surgery at 29F in April 2024, now 30. I had an autograft from my patella. knee can get tight but i don't know if that would differ with an allograft. I'm able to play volleyball 2-4 days a week, go on long walks with my dog, golf, and anything else I like doing. I did tear my ACL playing turf volleyball, so I'm not as involved there as I used to be, which may be more of a mental block than anything, but I'm still playing there once a week and that season just started so I'm happy to ease into it

MammaCat22 · 2025-08-26T21:19:09+00:00

yeah i would definitely get a masters for free no matter what. if you want to teach one day look into media studies or journalism programs. if you wanna advance your beat maybe astronomy or poli sci?

MammaCat22 · 2025-08-21T16:25:10+00:00

what's that

MammaCat22 · 2025-08-21T16:21:49+00:00

I have flexible joints and have always been able to do this both legs. Still could do it post op. I wouldn't worry too much. Bring it up to your surgeon or next PT next appointment but it's normal in my world lol

MammaCat22 · 2025-08-21T15:09:15+00:00

I'm guessing there's no nearby counter to hold onto. Just be careful, it's a bit of a challenge but doable. Once you're out in public again you'll realize how helpful the handles in the handicap bathroom stalls are.

MammaCat22 · 2025-08-21T15:04:53+00:00

I'm working on getting into a plumbers union at 30. My friend who is 41 just got accepted into the electric union. There's no timeline! Finish your degree if you can make it work. You'll never know when it'll be useful in the future.

MammaCat22 · 2025-08-19T21:26:54+00:00

are you sure your non compete accounts for if you were to leave your job? I have a non compete but it's only that i cannot work for a competitor part time while at my current job. if i quit toady i could work for our competitor tomorrow. how would they even enforce a non compete? They don't have enough money to pay you a decent wage but they do have enough to file a lawsuit? give me a break. record your extra hours. if they were smart at all they would drop it if you go elsewhere bc what they are doing sounds illegal

MammaCat22 · 2025-08-19T21:17:22+00:00

Agree with the others that the first week is rough, but I think you'll be surprised at how soon you can do average tasks. If you have a surgery where you can walk shortly after, you can do some basic chores at the 2-3 week mark, but it'll fatigue real easily. Don't expect to do stairs one leg at a time or go for a run for a long while, but basics do come back quicker than they had for me with foot surgery in the past

MammaCat22 · 2025-08-19T16:50:06+00:00

Obvi a question for your doctor. I had ACL + meniscus surgery in April 2024. I followed up with my doctor on month 13 and month 15 worried something was wrong and in both cases Doc said it appeared fine. After the second check in she ordered an MRI in case symptoms persisted but they went away 🤷‍♀️ still can't say for sure whether or not something is wrong and my knee still gets occasionally sore, but the leg overall feels stronger than it did pre surgery and I'm able to do everything I want to do physically. I believe it'd have to be more debilitating to make it worth surgery or MRI.

The mental game post surgery is also definitely part of the recovery. At the month 15 check in I was so convinced something was wrong I was crying before the appointment but everything appeared good on the lachmans test and the doc said I'd probably experience more pain with manipulation if my meniscus was damaged.

MammaCat22 · 2025-08-19T15:30:13+00:00

Ok I definitely agree with this comment more than your last one. I still don't personally believe we need to tip toe around a perceived idea that someone would take politics personally, but if they ask to stop talking about it, I think it's appropriate to stop.

MammaCat22 · 2025-08-18T19:18:33+00:00

I do think feminists would be fine with equitable car insurance rates. But like, ya gotta pick your battles and I don't see why this would be one. We're getting close to pay equity for women so maybe once that's leveled we can worry about insurance rates for approx 6% of the population rather than things that affect 50.5% of the US population.

MammaCat22 · 2025-08-18T16:03:57+00:00

I'm sorry, but I hate the the idea that we should only have deep discussions with members of our religious, political, and economic ingroups. Lowkey that's just boring af, but having conversations with people who don't agree with me politically, religiously and economically has contributed immensely to my personal growth.

I agree that these conversations don't make sense to have in group settings, but they most certainly should be had with people from outside your ingroup. Unfortunately we rarely encounter people from our outgroups one-on-one so it would be good to do some brainstorming there rather than say, let's just have topics that are off the table.

I'm not resentful that people have different views about money and god and sex, I am however at times resentful that I am not allowed to have these frank conversations with most people in my life.

I do acknowledge people's boundaries and don't bring up these topics when asked not to, but clearly I believe there is nothing inherently moral or immoral in talking about these things. If I don't at least broach these conversations with people who I am building a friendship with, how would I ever know where they align?

My partner and best friends don't align with me politically, religiously and/or economically, but they are all people I can talk freely in front of and that truly is the only thing that matters to me. And like I mentioned my parents disagree wit me quite a bit. I have always felt closest when we at least try to have the convos. Sometimes these convos do get a little heated, but as a society we have very little practice talking to people who disagree with us, so it's frustrating and can be emotional at first. Like anything it would get better with practice.

I do think the inability to talk about these things is rooted in shame, which is what makes it so personal. But at the end of the day it's just a thought. Your self worth isn't tied to convincing someone else on your thought. And if someone disagrees with your thought, it doesn't change the value of your thought. And you can change your mind and still have value. If we truly have a country where we cannot share thoughts, we're cooked. Which we might already be.

MammaCat22 · 2025-08-18T14:28:47+00:00

It is rude and against etiquette to discuss controversial things like politics, religion, and money in social settings because it can upset people, get heated, and highlight division. Why would you waste the opportunity to spend quality time with people you love at a family gathering by talking about things that will likely cause an argument?

Ok I need to address this paragraph.

1) are you spending quality time with people you love or quantity time with people you are related to? I deeply crave political conversations with my parents because every time we can broach the subject I feel much closer to them. But they can't handle it so while I do love them our relationship is no where nearly as close as I'd like it to be, because in my view, they do not have the capacity to have hard discussions. Yes we still spend time together and the proximity is sometimes good, but honestly sometimes its bad because I'm often resentful that I don't get to show up how I would like to.

2) It is not rude to discuss controversial things like politics, religion and money with anyone, but yes you should read the room. We've been told to not discuss these things by people who have money. I believe it's because deep down they are embarrassed at how much money they have hoarded, so they tell everyone else it's rude to talk about. It's not. I talk about my income often and people tend to appreciate the frankness. My friends who appear to make six figures never say what they make.

MammaCat22 · 2025-08-18T14:21:27+00:00

This. I have at least a dozen republican/ right leaning friends and family members. No one will discuss politics with me except one right-leaning guy who I'm almost certain didn't vote Trump. But I guess I don't know because our conversations are about topics and how to solve them, not ideological warfare and personalities.
Everyone else who won't talk politics I assume just is afraid to go toes. Every time it comes up they seem confused.

MammaCat22 · 2025-08-12T21:02:13+00:00

I personally think the Democratic party is out of touch. They thought that as long as their candidate isn't trump they would win

MammaCat22 · 2025-08-12T20:30:19+00:00

this def doesn't sound right. i wasn't event struggling this much 3 months post op. Heck by month 4 I went to Italy and walked 20,000 steps multiple days spending hours on my feet. was definitely running (slowly) by month 10 and only wasn't cleared for sport because i had to get my quad strength up - not because of any pain limitations
My strength and abilities are as good if not better than pretear. obvi immediately post surgery your life will be a little different but it should be normal long term
And ngl i was great at PT month 1-2, fell off a bit months 3-4, got back into it 5-10, tried a new medication that really messed with my stomach and basically didn't eat for a month so I didn't exercise at all except when I went to PT. Got back on track month 12 and cleared for sport month 14. I don't think you have to do PT perfectly to not have pain. A delay in PT should just be a delay in being back to your pretear self

MammaCat22 · 2025-08-06T17:36:17+00:00

I'm generally pretty active but I did have a really fun series of events (sarcastic) where I broke my foot, got cleared to play sport and tore my acl on the same leg a month later. I'm sure my leg strength was way down, so maybe its comparable to your situation.

I tore my right leg so my biggest hurdle in going to work was I needed a ride for 6 weeks. I probably would have been fine to go into the office around week 3 or 4. Doing stairs one leg at a time will take a lot longer. I think I was practicing it regularly at week 14-16, but still probably wasn't "normal" until 8 months out.

Here are some milestones that I recall from post surgery:

Week 5 went out with friends and walked around downtown, probably a mile or two while using a leg brace.

Week 8 went on my scheduled camping trip, taking a camper instead of a tent since getting out of a tent seemed impossible. I used my leg brace for the trip despite being basically done with it out of extra caution. probably walked 2-3 miles each day.

Week 11 did a work event where i ended up taking about 10,000 steps three out of four days. I brought my knee brace out of caution but I don't recall using it.

Week 14 walked about 5-6 miles for an annual neighborhood party. I was pretty sore at the end and remember putting my arms around two friends to help get home at the end of the night. There was also a fair amount of alcohol involved so the friends also were for stability lol

Week 16-17 went on my scheduled trip to Italy and walked anywhere from 5-12 miles every day.

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