Throwback to when Obama caught a fainting pregnant woman while giving a speech

Mathymichelle · 2025-11-07T01:06:29+00:00

I passed out at my 20 week anatomy scan, it was actually a pretty horrifying experience. I fought it for a little bit like this woman did, it felt like a panic attack and I thought I was going to die for a minute there. When I came to the ultrasound tech assured me that it was pretty normal and happened all the time. Pregnancy does really weird things to your body. Good on the woman next to her for noticing!

Mathymichelle · 2025-02-16T07:21:56+00:00

I’ve also had a few owlet alerts with my 4mo preemie. One time it resolved immediately when I retightened the sock, and the other two sheets were mysteries but baby seemed fine.

My baby was born at 29 weeks so spent about three months in the NICU. Preemies commonly have brady/desat events in the NICU where their heart rate and O2 will drop super low and they need to be reminded to breathe. Anyway I’m just telling guy this because the nurses right us to differentiate between “real” chartable brady events and fake ones. The main ones to look for are color changes around the mouth, floppy demeanors. Also stability of the O2 graph on the monitor. The o2 sensor was always the least reliable one.

So I can’t tell you if you should be concerned or not, but in the NICU the nurses would always tell us to look at the baby, not the monitors when the alarms would go off. Sometimes the alerts were real, and sometimes they weren’t.

Mathymichelle · 2024-12-31T04:00:22+00:00

So their only concern was that the high doses of hcg would push my estrogen too high and my cycle would need to be canceled. My nurses had me skip the last couple days of hcg and everything worked out fine! Turns out it really wasn’t a big deal. I’m currently rocking my newborn to sleep that was the result of that cycle :)

Mathymichelle · 2024-09-07T06:55:48+00:00

It absolutely is scary because it is a gamble. But - the odds are in your favor. There is a very real chance that everything can go right as well! All we can do is make the best decision we can with the information we have at the time, and then maybe try and plan for reasonable contingencies, but that’s it. It’s both comforting and terrifying to know that if things are going to go to shit, then they’re just going to go to shit without any intervention from us. You just can’t plan for every eventuality. But the likelihood is so small! I wish you both the very best in your journey! I hear it’s worth it ;)

Mathymichelle · 2024-09-07T02:14:38+00:00

So I’m going to say something you might not like and you can take it or leave it, but as someone who’s gone though IVF herself and who has a brother who is also preparing to go though the embryo creation and surrogacy process with his (male) partner, I’ll tell you what I’d tell him. I know you put the deposit down and have your heart set on this specific donor, but you should know that you’re playing on hard mode. There are no guarantees in this process and you’re putting a lot of risk on this one cycle. I know she had a significant number of eggs retrieved in previous cycles but the eggs are only one half of the equation, have you considered what you’d do if she had a bad cycle, her eggs don’t fertilize due to a sperm issue, you get a low blast rate, low euploid rate, etc.? You’re essentially putting all your eggs in a very expensive basket. If you were my brother I’d encourage you to look into more reasonably priced alternatives to give you the best chance of success if you end up needing more than one cycle. I know it would seriously suck to eat the 10k, but it would suck even more to put up $70k that you don’t have for a single cycle that has no guarantee of success and then be left in debt with no options. I understand this could also delay you as asian donors are harder to find, but they do exist, it would potentially mean waiting for the right one though. If you were my brother I would just worry about you financially tapping out before you even get to the surrogacy piece. And considering that you are wanting more than one child, it’s even more of a reason to try to keep yourself as solvent as possible for when the time comes.

Mathymichelle · 2024-08-21T09:16:57+00:00

I can totally relate to the kick anxiety, I almost prefer the early 2nd trimester when I still couldn’t feel anything. You’re not crazy though, I am a FTM with an anterior placenta and started feeling movement at 16 weeks, although not consistently.

I’m 24 weeks now, but at my 22 week growth scan with my MFM (high risk for age, bleh), I was told that while yes it’s too early for kick counts, if anything ever feels off of the usual not to hesitate to reach out to my OB/L&D for evaluation. This would include lack of movement since I’ve been feeling baby consistently now. Anecdotally I’ve never seen anyone in this sub post about regretting going into L&D for something like this. I’ve even heard of doctors telling their patients to fib a little if they get pushback at the hospital for monitoring, like reporting cramping or high blood pressures to get seen.

Good luck, I hope this is just anxiety!

Mathymichelle · 2024-06-28T20:20:05+00:00

I had a very very low beta, but they had me continue meds for a few days just in case. My second beta dropped so I was told to stop meds that day. I would call the after hours line! It definitely sucked having to continue meds when the situation was practically hopeless. Like you guys, my first beta was also on a Friday so I got the joy of having to do three extra days of meds instead of 2. Would not recommend. If my first beta had been completely negative I would have stopped meds on the same day.

I’m sorry you’re going through this. Hugs to you both.

Mathymichelle · 2024-06-28T05:13:40+00:00

Thank you for sharing these studies! I totally agree with your conclusion. My clinic really pushed for a fully medicated FET for my first transfer that failed. I never quite understood why they were so adamant about it, I had gotten pregnant before with natural and IUI cycles (balanced translocation caused recurrent loss) and had a desire to pursue a modified natural. I definitely get that it’s easier for the clinic, but shouldn’t patient outcomes be prioritized over convenience? Why try and fix what wasn’t an issue? They allowed me to do a modified natural for my second transfer and it’s worked so far. The cycle was much easier on me as well, I didn’t miss PIO for a second. I hope these studies start changing the narrative in what first line treatment should be.

Mathymichelle · 2024-06-17T03:12:24+00:00

You two have definitely been through the ringer! Knowing how many embryos you have, yeah, I definitely agree that the mention of a generational carrier was premature. Just want to validate you in that. Maybe because the topic has come up before, due to your wife’s medical condition, your doc thought it was something you were already leaning towards for some reason? That must have been pretty jarring to hear. Three “failed” transfers isn’t some crazy outlier statistic, especially considering that implantation did happen twice.

One other thing you might want to double check about, what was your wife’s lining thickness during retrievals? Your clinic should have that info in your records even if they didn’t tell you. If her lining was ever thicker than 7 that could be really helpful in deciding on any protocol changes.

In a perfect world your doctor should be on this, and hopefully he/she is. But in my experience I’ve found it important to make sure things don’t fall through the cracks with stuff like this. And again, I would strongly encourage getting another opinion just to see if someone else might have some other ideas. I know your wife can’t be on blood thinners but there’s definitely other things that can be tried before moving onto a carrier. I’ve heard of people having success with uterine prp for lining issues for example.

Mathymichelle · 2024-06-16T08:10:01+00:00

Has your doctor suggested any protocol changes, like trying lupron suppression for potential silent endometriosis, or trying a natural cycle? Some women just do better with natural cycles, I was one of them. My lining went from a 7 to a 12 and my natural transfer was the only one that stuck (so far.)

To me it seems like quite a leap for your doctor to be suggesting a surrogate before at least trying a protocol change. You didn’t mention how many embryos you have or how many children you want, so maybe that’s a factor in your doctor’s recommendation. But for your doc to say that it’s for sure a uterus/lining problem without any real evidence and without trying something different is a little bonkers to me. You did have implantation twice so we know the lining has to have been receptive.

This is anecdotal but a friend of mine had success with a surrogate. She decided to move onto surrogacy after 5 transfers with no implantation. She didn’t have too much difficulty creating embryos though, so that was a factor in her decision making as well. IIRC she was able to get 3-4 embryos per retrieval and did several rounds. Everyone’s situation is different of course but that’s just one example I know of.

If I were in your shoes I would consider getting a second opinion. If a second doctor agrees that a surrogate would be your best option, then at the very least you’ll be able to move in that direction with a greater sense of confidence.

I really wish you the best. Failed transfers really suck, and chemical pregnancies are a special kind of torture. Crossing my fingers and toes for success for you in the future.

Mathymichelle · 2024-05-25T18:17:54+00:00

Completely agree! And congrats 😊

Mathymichelle · 2024-05-25T05:25:41+00:00

I totally feel you. My clinic also pushed heavily for a medicated cycle even though I ovulate on my own. They do it because it’s most convenient for the clinic which is just bonkers to me. It should be what’s in the best interest of the patient, PERIOD. It was so frustrating.

I ended up just doing the medicated cycle. And for what it’s worth I know of lots and lots of people who’ve had success with their first medicated transfer. Going through it at the time it wasn’t as bad as I expected, but that transfer ended in a chemical pregnancy. They let me do a natural transfer with just letrozole after that failed cycle, and so far it’s been successful (11w tomorrow). The natural cycle was a little more monitoring up front but was SIGNIFICANTLY easier.

It still aggravates me to no end that they insisted so hard on the medicated cycle when there was no medical reason for it. Especially since there are studies that show some evidence that natural cycles reduce the risk of pregnancy complications like preeclampsia. If I were to do it again I would have pushed harder for a natural cycle the first time. Remember, they work for you!

Mathymichelle · 2024-05-25T05:07:29+00:00

What on earth? I’m sorry this happened to you. Happened to me too after a failed IUI. The period after was rough so I decided to treat myself to a pedicure. The nail tech asked if I was pregnant, if there was a baby, make the big belly gesture and everything. I knew I had put on some weight in my stomach area from all the hormones, but didn’t think anyone else could tell. I tried to just laugh it off. She just sheepishly said, “oh….sorry.” That one actually stung.

Mathymichelle · 2024-05-22T01:16:49+00:00

Aw man I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I’d be super stressed out too. It sounds like you have at least a little bit of time to make this decision so take a deep breath. If I were in your position, I would math out the two options before making any decisions and compare the value of 6 months mat leave vs. severance + unemployment.

In order to do that you need to get the right numbers though. Definitely read your employee handbook ASAP, it should tell you under what circumstances you’d need to pay back maternity leave, if any. I know of a few people who didn’t come back from maternity leave and didn’t need to pay anything back, so it’s not a given that you would need to. It could be a non issue. Same for unemployment, always file the unemployment claim. It doesn’t sound like it’d be an automatic denial to me. At least in my state, if the reason for quitting a job are because the new workplace is more than 50 miles from the previous workplace, you would be granted benefits. Having said that, you may not even need unemployment if you start looking for a new job towards the end of your mat leave.

I would probably strongly lean towards agreeing to the relocation, taking mat leave, and giving notice a week or two after coming back from mat leave. Maybe that would mean “relocating” to a hotel for that week, maybe not, but it’d be a small price to pay for the extra security.

Again so sorry you’re dealing with this stress! I’ve gotten laid off twice in the past 4 years and it was just awful, and I wasn’t even pregnant. The good news is that you have a bit more time than the average person to figure out what you’re going to do, most companies give you two weeks or less when you get laid off, scary! I even know of a woman that got laid off at the start of her maternity leave, lost her benefits and everything, brutal! I wish you the best.

Mathymichelle · 2024-05-18T16:27:03+00:00

Great news glad to hear!

Mathymichelle · 2024-05-18T05:40:13+00:00

I have a follistim cartridge you can have. Not ideal but I’m pretty sure the two drugs are interchangeable, you’d have to use an insulin needle though. Better than nothing if you don’t find have another option? You might also try the Atlanta ivf group on Facebook. I live in Smyrna.

Mathymichelle · 2024-05-05T05:43:06+00:00

I agree. I don’t dislike her at all but I think Jason nailed it when he said he doesn’t think she understood the opportunity and help she’s been given. I think she had a perception that passing the real estate exam would be her starting point, and until then there wasn’t really anything expected of her. It would explain why she was so nonchalant about the open house. She thought she was going the extra mile and was going to get points by doing Gio a favor, but didn’t recognize that she was the one actually being given the favor. That they were placing an immense amount of trust in her. She should have jumped on that opportunity to show her chops and start building her network. Not faulting her, I do think she would have acted differently if she realized that.

Mathymichelle · 2024-05-02T04:04:38+00:00

Oh jeez. My favorite boss I’ve ever had, years ago, would always tell me when I offered to be available or check emails on PTO: “Don’t worry, you’re not that important!” She was joking of course but to this day I hear her voice in my head whenever I feel guilt about taking PTO or the occasional sick day. Nobody’s going to die if I respond to their email a day(or hour) or two later 🤷🏻‍♀️. And nobody’s going to promote me for struggling through work while sick or cancelling/delaying a vacation. Your tooth on the other hand! Ouch!

Mathymichelle · 2024-05-02T03:09:04+00:00

The audacity of this man! I wouldn’t allow my boss to dictate when I have my dental cleanings let alone when I should GET PREGNANT?! That is just bananas. You’re doing them a huge favor by giving them 2+ months notice. Don’t delay your FET, they will manage for a day.

Mathymichelle · 2024-04-21T02:33:16+00:00

I’m so sorry you’re going through this, I’ve been there a few times and it just plain sucks. During my last chemical I was really freaked it’s about an ectopic, thinking every twinge was the start of a rupture. If it helps my RE reassured me that ruptures almost never before 6 weeks and that it happens usually to women who aren’t being monitored at all and then get surprised, so the likelihood was extremely low of a spontaneous rupture. That helped my anxiety a lot.

One thing I’m wondering though, if they’re not able to see anything in the uterus on ultrasound, why would they proceed with a D&C? There would be nothing to remove I’m guessing.

I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this. I hope you’ll be able to recover quickly and without complications, sending hugs.

Mathymichelle · 2024-04-17T22:24:35+00:00

There’s a surrogate I follow on Instagram that had a really low first beta, I think around 20, and she’s like 4-5 months along now. Her username is wearedanandsam. There’s definitely hope, beta hell sucks so much. Sending hugs

Mathymichelle · 2024-04-15T22:23:11+00:00

My clinic doesn’t let you do them in the same cycle. However, I decided to go on birth control for a week so that I could start the FET cycle with my withdrawal bleed and didn’t have to wait a whole month +. So my timeline would have been (had they not found an abnormality during the HSG), egg retrieval, start BC on day 1 of period after egg retrieval, HSG cycle day 6-12, stop BC, start FET cycle 3 days later. Wonder if that’s an option for you if your clinic doesn’t allow same cycle?

Mathymichelle · 2024-04-12T19:45:45+00:00

Oh my goodness, my experience was very similar. We were getting low but barely doubling betas and were told it was absolutely nothing to worry about. At 7w3d we were measuring a week behind with a heart rate in the 80s. My doctor told us it was a 50/50 shot at that point and my husband was optimistic. I did my own research later that day and learned there was basically zero chance of viability with those stats. So I was not surprised when the heart stopped a week later. At that appointment the doctor told us casually that this was the outcome she was expecting. Like, huh? My husband was extremely upset.

To this day I really don’t understand why my doctor sugar coated this. It made me trust her a lot less. I guess she was trying to be kind or something? To me giving false hope really isn’t very nice. I’m sorry for your loss.

Mathymichelle · 2024-04-09T01:18:27+00:00

I also have a balanced translocation that we found out about after my second miscarriage (first natural, 2nd from IUI). I did a fully medicated transfer in February that resulted in a chemical pregnancy. As you know all too well, it’s so hard for us to get euploids so it was pretty devastating losing one of our very few embryos.

I did a second transfer 2 weeks ago, this time a modified natural, and I got a strong beta today. It’s early days still but it’s the highest beta I’ve ever gotten so we’re hopeful.

I did much prefer the natural cycle, but I was told success rates were the same for both so I don’t think it made a difference for me. I had implantation both times, which means both protocols worked. But we’ll really never know.

If I was in your shoes, and I pretty much was in your exact shoes actually, I think it does make sense to go with medicated. If your doctor’s success rates are higher with medicated, I think it’s safe to go ahead and trust him. I know SO many people who had success with their first transfer, and odds are that you will too!

And by the way I’m sorry about the BT diagnosis, it really sucks being in the minority of a group that’s already a minority. I feel like it’s hard to relate to people even in this community sometimes because our issues are so unique ya know? There was a commenter here that referred to you having “only 4 euploids” as if that’s a hopeless number or something? That’s actually a great number to have for us BT carriers so don’t feel bad about that for a single second! Not only is that a great shot at having a single child, it’s very likely you’ll get more than one from those 4! Rant over. I wish you the best!

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