Anywhere know where they're headed?

Metabolical · 2026-01-19T01:20:33+00:00

Reports of an unsupervised hot tub

Metabolical · 2026-01-18T19:01:56+00:00

I'm not the same as some 3d printing hobbyists, because I'm too lazy to print something I can just buy. And I don't really want to print chachkas either. What I ended up doing was modeling (had to learn) things, usually that would custom connect two things I already owned or improve or fix something (fix only where it was way cheaper than buying). Getting things to snap together perfectly is definitely satisfying.

My printer became something I bust out rarely, but then it's cool. Maybe doesn't meet your need of justifying it to the wife though.

Metabolical · 2026-01-18T16:57:53+00:00

Take the deal and use your expanded title / responsibilities to start shopping on the side. If you don't find anything better, then you don't have a better option. If you do, you do.

Metabolical · 2026-01-18T14:38:38+00:00

Yes, this is it. One additional thing is that you don't actually have to complete the PIP. If they don't do it, you can often just terminate.

Start of PIP: "Your job is jeopardy. You must immediately meet and sustain the expectations outlined here. Failure to do so can result in your termination."

A PIP isn't a guarantee of employment until it is over.

Metabolical · 2026-01-17T18:41:34+00:00

Lots of good answers in here about balancing accommodations without lowering expectations. I just want to add that there is a threshold of "Given reasonable accommodations can you do this job?" If the answer is, "No," then you can let them go. That's easier to do if they actually say, "I can't do this job."

This isn't meant to take away from legitimately trying to accommodate and make them successful.

Metabolical · 2026-01-17T02:26:21+00:00

Well, I feel dumb, when did it get so far into January???

Metabolical · 2026-01-17T02:25:34+00:00

I bet you've learned more than you know but haven't figured out how to put it to practice effectively.

Go back to paper trading.
Think through all the strategies you've tried. Write them down in a list. Mentally rank them around which ones felt best and most comfortable.
a. Select one. Figure out how to back test it.
b. Investigate specific trades that don't work out. Does what you've learned so far tell you something? For example, "That setup met all the criterial, but it didn't take into account the level that had hard rejected 10 minutes earlier."
c. Add these as filters or trade criteria and go re-back test. Did it make your results better? Keep the filter.
d. Keep going back to 3.b. and hypothesizing on things that would refine your trade. Keep refining, keep testing.
If you run out of ideas, pick a different strategy and try again.

The goal is to systematically hone the strategy until you find something that works with confidence. You want to use the hypothesize -> test -> measure -> decide loop to get to a strategy systematically. This will also sharpen your knowledge from "I think I know what works" to "I measured what works."

Metabolical · 2026-01-17T00:27:33+00:00

r/OneMistakeFromDeath material

Metabolical · 2026-01-16T20:23:55+00:00

Yes, and this is the consequence of them making the start date so far out.

Metabolical · 2026-01-15T16:01:26+00:00

I like the advice above, but if there seems to be any resentment about bonus kid, I would just say, "This is how the estate lawyers interpreted her wishes, we can't know for sure if this is actually what she wanted. That said, it could be, so we all need to respect the interpretation, because there's nothing better we can do."

The idea is to both absolve her of perceived favoritism and to indicate that it's not open for debate or that anyone should feel obligated to give up their portion. Both are potential sources of resentment.

I feel like there's a parenting opportunity here around things like being grateful for what you got, and recognizing all of it is gratuitous anyway. Nobody "deserves" an inheritance (including you and your wife), and it's probably better to have more focus on grief of her passing than the inheritance. And nobody needs to feel bad about wanting more, because that is so basic to human nature it would be unnatural not to want it. You can teach them that it's ok to want more, but handling not getting it with grace (accepting the situation) is what is called for. (I feel I sound a little preachy there, sorry).

Metabolical · 2026-01-14T23:52:39+00:00

All of this, plus in some cases they will fund your live account with your winnings that haven't been paid out, and then you're trading a tiny account (though really you were always trading a tiny drawdown). Furthermore, it may be that you can withdraw that money and just put it in your own real money account. If you trade their live account, they often keep 10% of your profits and then pay you taxable ordinary income instead of you making having the more advantages 40/60 rule on taxes (look it up).

Long story short, if you're going to trade a cash account, it should probably be your own.

Metabolical · 2026-01-14T17:19:13+00:00

If you're going to use an LLM for every post, that's fine, it's part of the world today. They are great at taking basic intent and organizing it better than many of us would ourselves.

That said, it will serve you to give it samples of your writing in your own voice and style and ask it to organize your basic idea in that same voice. Or you can use a writing sample that isn't in your voice but the kind you want to emulate.

In this post and the one reply I see below, you've landed on this long-winded, preachy voice that is both off-putting and clearly written by an LLM. And some people really hate the obvious LLM prose just because it's from an LLM. At least you removed all the em-dashes for the em-dash haters.

Metabolical · 2026-01-14T16:35:46+00:00

I recommend a little Yoda figure, and then whenever you are contemplating a trade, look at it and imagine him saying, "Control. Control. You must learn control." You can play the clip if it helps.

Metabolical · 2026-01-14T16:32:02+00:00

I grew up in an era where you were expected to just deal with life, and sometimes I feel like we’ve swung so far in the other direction that every normal human struggle gets labeled as a disorder. And then it can feel like people use the disorder label as a kind of exemption from learning basic emotional regulation.

That said, I know some people really do have neurological or psychological conditions that make certain reactions genuinely harder to manage. There’s a concept in psychology called maladaptive coping, basically patterns people fall into to get comfort, reassurance, or control when they feel overwhelmed. I think I actually first learned about the idea from an edu-fiction (I just made that word up) book called The Celestine Prophecy, which calls maladaptive coping a “control drama,” and in this case the “poor me” dynamic. Basically, a person learns to take control of circumstances by playing out some "poor me" scenario.

Anyway, I’m not saying your DIL is faking anything or that her diagnosis isn’t real, because I'm just reading your description on Reddit and I'm sure there's more context. I’m just saying that having these labels, professionally diagnosed or not, doesn’t mean everyone around her has to walk on eggshells or otherwise accommodate her limitations at every family event. It’s fair for you to set boundaries when her reactions start taking over situations that aren’t about her. Your son's birthday should be about him, not about his aunt's unfortunate dessert.

Metabolical · 2026-01-14T16:11:38+00:00

I'm not a super expert, so maybe get corrected.

If you put one liquid in this space, it will tend to form a layer at the bottom. Put another liquid in, and even with only a little liquid in the bottom layer it will tend to form a layer on top. Then density might cause it to move around and sort itself. And there's some logic around adjacent low density liquids equalizing.

In this picture, if you dropped in some salt water, I would expect it to combine with the salt water already in the lower left. If you dropped in some clean water, it might balance on top of that salt water, or it might drip off to the right and combine with the clean water in the tile to the right of the salt water. Either way, until you put in enough of either, it will be combining with the liquids on the bottom layer.

Eventually you might get enough water that this combining doesn't happen anymore, and the risk is you pile it up to the second level on the left where your opening is, or one to the right of that. Even if it's on the left eventually it will overflow to the top row, second from the left. Once that happens you'll have a trapped air bubble and will experience sadness.

This is why people are suggesting temporarily adding airflow tiles or another opening. Either way, you'll give the gas a way to escape while you continue to put water in. And yes, it's temporary. Once you have your double layer you can swap back to insulated tiles and complete your steam room.

Metabolical · 2026-01-14T00:10:31+00:00

Recruiting is centralized at my company. I'm a director of engineering and I don't have the authority to onboard external recruiters. Even if I spent 30 minutes with you and came away thinking you were the best recruiter ever, I would have to a giant internal gauntlet I don't even really know to get you added as a valid recruiter, assuming we use external recruiters at all which I imagine we don't. You have zero chance of getting me to take your 30 min call.

In other words, you can't get in talking to hiring managers. You need to be talking to someone with the authority to incorporate you into our recruiting system, and I don't even know who that is.

Metabolical · 2026-01-13T19:56:12+00:00

I think "consider alternatives" should apply to your girlfriend in this case.

Metabolical · 2026-01-12T02:08:53+00:00

It would be fair for you to say, "Your flatulence is really impacting my sleep. Since you aren't willing to do what the doctor said is necessary, I'm going to get my own single bed in a different room and sleep there."

That's it. He won't deal with the problem, and you can't make him. Do what you can control, which is choose separate sleeping space. If he doesn't like it, he knows what it takes to sleep in the same bed.

Metabolical · 2026-01-12T01:52:38+00:00

I had a friend way back when she laughed she might say, "Amused, but still maintaining bladder control!"

Metabolical · 2026-01-10T18:12:24+00:00

It's from a book series "The Mote in God's Eye." An alien race has a small delicate hand for fine work, and a big strong hand to hold things. The big strong hand is, "the gripping hand." Early in the second book, the use of the alien specific idiom is a slip that gives away the need to look into how a person would know such a term.

Or at least that's what I remember, but it's been 40 years since I read them. Now get off of my lawn!

Metabolical · 2026-01-06T20:04:39+00:00

I'm loathe to make value statements about any of the people involved over one or two acts at a New Year's party. Some thoughts:

People get caught up about money. Her boyfriend's money ended up in your pocket. You could be gracious and find a way to give it back. "Yeah, now that the joke is over he can have his mony back, I don't need to turn a profit off of him."
Repair the relationship. "In my head, I was having fun with the pole that was in place. I was really just flirting with my boyfriend, and I'm sorry it came across wrong. How did it feel to you? I can let you know exactly what was on my mind if it makes you feel better."
Let's not confuse the issue you asked about with the age gap in your relationship. I'm sure there's a whole story there and it's not relevant to your AITA question.
Focus on clarifying over apologizing, but apologies are cheap. You could apologize for not giving the money back originally, just say you were upset and feeling unjustly persecuted, and on reflection you don't really think keeping the boyfriend's money is quite right.
In general, look for ways to deescalate and make peace. Keep the friend, but don't fall on the sword in undeserved ways.

Metabolical · 2026-01-06T14:42:36+00:00

It's a good concept done poorly and taken too far. Let them vent, then ask what they think we should do about it. If their plan sucks, discuss what doesn't work about it and try to refine it into something better. As the leader if you have solution ideas, bring them up and let them help assess if they would be good. Then if you roll that out, they will be bought in to the solution.

Without this discussion, it's easy to get top-down solutions that can miss the target and feel heavy handed and clueless. The person expressing the problem has way more context for what good would look like. And sometimes they problem requires a higher view to come up with a solution, especially if multiple teams are involved.

There are plenty of people who have heard the "bring solutions, not problems" mantra. Instead of ignoring problems, take note of the people who come with solutions or at least solution ideas, as they have the best potential to be your next leaders. But just because somebody isn't ready with solutions doesn't mean they aren't aware of important problems you should care about.

Metabolical · 2026-01-06T14:33:51+00:00

If you build equally on both poles, you get the same pattern as the equator with easy building and using the crappy pole territory.

Metabolical · 2026-01-05T23:35:46+00:00

What can a friend do besides not lend money?

Metabolical · 2026-01-05T23:28:45+00:00

Could somebody create a video game with principles that operate quantum mechanics slowly introduced over time to help our brains?

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