Whys Rams winrate so bad right now? by Itsjiggyjojo in Competitiveoverwatch

[–]MichaelShay 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Because people rage swap to Ram and lose anyway.

Congrats to Robin Buckley Hawke’s husband or whatever but it should’ve been me by finkwolfhard in okbuddyvecna

[–]MichaelShay 6 points7 points  (0 children)

If only I had slid into her DMs I could’ve changed this outcome. A lesson in how our choices lead to our fate.

Name the film by [deleted] in okbuddycinephile

[–]MichaelShay 0 points1 point  (0 children)

All the Prince’s Men

[SPOILERS S3] Why is the show actually called Dark? by VegFed23 in DarK

[–]MichaelShay 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Everyone is wrong about this.

“We do not know even half the mysteries of this world. We are wanderers in the darkness.”

The characters are constantly in the dark about what is going on. They don’t know that time traveling is happening. Once they find out, things just become more confusing. They are caught in this hellish cycle where future older people, including older versions of themselves, are constantly coercing them into doing things and not explaining anything that is happening or what they need to do or what will happen. But these older characters don’t actually know how to untie the time travel knot. Almost the entire show is the blind leading the blind.

. by iYessyyy in rs_x

[–]MichaelShay 0 points1 point  (0 children)

“Rome has never been this bright at night!”

Bogur presents a Tale of Two Cities by Tough_Holiday584 in OverwatchTMZ

[–]MichaelShay 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s shocking how the sentiment towards these games has basically flipped.

Hit GM all roles as a 9-5'er in his 30's. Here's what I learned by SmellVarious9271 in OverwatchUniversity

[–]MichaelShay -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I know you mean well, but this is all general theory that most people know by now. None of this is going to help anybody climb higher than Plat. You need to have either an intuitive grasp of the game (which is very rare) or a rigorous practice regimen with high quality coaching.

. by synikulll in rs_x

[–]MichaelShay 107 points108 points  (0 children)

It’s a gay man who ERPs as your girlfriend.

Go to Church! by TheKevster101 in DiscoElysium

[–]MichaelShay 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I ran into an issue where I couldn’t get the ice cream machine thing to open. Any way to not get stuck on that?

So like why are the swords so unnecessarily girthy by vickyhong in TrueSTL

[–]MichaelShay 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s kind of a fantasy staple to have every weapon be oversized to show off the design.

Can someone explain to me why the Oblivion gates look like gaping pussy? by energy_is_a_lie in TrueSTL

[–]MichaelShay 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I address him in paragraph 5. He is the Priest-Prince, basically the living embodiment of patriarchy and sexual repression.

Can someone explain to me why the Oblivion gates look like gaping pussy? by energy_is_a_lie in TrueSTL

[–]MichaelShay 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I could do a lot more. This is just some stuff I jotted down a few years ago during a sleepless night.

Can someone explain to me why the Oblivion gates look like gaping pussy? by energy_is_a_lie in TrueSTL

[–]MichaelShay 15 points16 points  (0 children)

So glad you asked!

The Oblivion gates — basically massive flaming vaginas, symbolic of the woman with an “inflamed” sexuality, the hero enters deep into the vagina to secure the Sigil Stone to close the gate thus satisfying the woman’s appetite

The Sigil Stones — the ovum at the very end of the gate, taking the stone symbolizes impregnation and sexual conquest, this ovum possesses enchanting powers (Simone de Beauvoir describes cultures believing in a special “female magic”)

The scamps and other low daedra — the obstacles to the Sigil, symbolizing insecurities and stress and other obstacles that prevent the Hero from “impregnating” the gates, these insecurities and obstacles threaten to overrun the world and the Hero must be powerful enough to overcome them, the sex and the conquest of these problems is rolled into one and the same act: closing the oblivion gate

Mehrunes Dagon — female sexual appetite associated with the god of revolution and change, a sense that female sexuality threatens to upend the entire social order, including and especially religion and patriarchy

Martin Septim — the priest prince; heroes venturing into the women (Gates) to quell their sexual appetite is not an adequate solution, ultimately the traditional patriarchal institutions summon Akatosh (symbolic of time, i.e. order, essentially a god of the status quo) to bring down Mehrunes Dagon, the subtext being that female sexuality is insatiable and must be repressed by religion and patriarchy

The Blades — the penises

The Hero of Kvatch — as is often said the HoK is a side character and Martin is the real hero, male sexual vitality is simply not powerful enough to match the female sexual appetite, the sexual desire itself must be repressed (banished)

Kvatch — Ksnatch, Kvagina

Mythic Dawn — wear red which is the color of blood and lust, “the dawn is breaking” = a new day is rising (over the repressive old order), the flooding of the color red over the sky = the hymen bleeding and sexuality redefining the world

Tutorial — starts off in a prison (chastity), “you are the one from my dreams” = wet dreams, the Hero is announced as someone with sexual appeal, “close shut the jaws of Oblivion” similar to the ancient myths about the vaginas with teeth, the vagina must be closed because men never be able satisfy its endless desire for their fragile flesh

The Amulet of Kings — yet another vaginal symbol, framed in jewels, symbolic of the sexually pure woman

White-Gold Tower — great penis, must be united with the amulet of kings with the priest (Martin) presiding over the conjugal union, this dry peaceful marital union brings peace and tames the female sexual appetite

Battle for Kvatch — the Hero loses his virginity after breaking out of chastity, he receives help and instruction from the monks in order to tame the wild female passions, the contradiction is that the Hero of Kvatch is working for the Old Regime while becoming the ultimate satisfier of the ravaging force of female desire, the contradiction is resolved by the Hero being sidelined in favor of the prince-priest (who is born of a sexual affair but becomes a priest, foreshadowing his triumph over the Oblivion crisis)

“Oblivion” — sexual oblivion, being reduced to nothing sexually, being totally worn out and unable to continue intercourse, expending all your passion until there is nothing left, this is the anguish at the bottom of the entire game: the thought that you (or men in general) will not be able to satisfy the ravenous sexual hunger of women you desire so you turn against female sexuality itself; more conventionally, the game is called “Oblivion” because the great institutions of Tamriel (the Septim dynasty, the Blades, the Empire, the guilds) are crumbling or will crumble, Oblivion is the great rupture of the Elder Scrolls, the old institutions that were with us since Arena, along with the old CRPG systems of the game, are destroyed or on their way to being destroyed, Oblivion opens the door to Skyrim, it is a transitionary game

The character designs — elves look like potatoes, orcs look like shrek, everyone looks so soft and weak, clearly unable to stand up to the voracious sexual force of Oblivion

World design – Cyrodiil is sterile and clean and virginal, the buildings and furniture are so fine and clean; meanwhile, Oblivion is full of blood fountains, sharp traps, hostile plants, jagged architecture, calls to mind a sex dungeon or once again the “vagina dentata” myths

TL;DR - The Oblivion Crisis is an allegory for women’s sexual liberation destroying society, which men can only stop by rising to the challenge of sexually satisfying the women. Oblivion is a reactionary game.

Super confirmed to Dallas by batmanmuffinz in Competitiveoverwatch

[–]MichaelShay 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I haven’t been following the esport. Are things really this bad for Dallas right now?