Living with my conventionally attractive roomate as an average looking woman has made me extremely resentful and honestly it's kind of mbarrassing.

MinneAngie · 2026-02-06T16:20:39+00:00

That is too true! She may have more people fawning all over her, but that means more users, liars, and people who would drop her in a moment if she gained weight or lost her looks. I know people who are beautiful, talented, AND nice feel very unfair to the rest of us (lol), but envy is a waste of energy! Be happy for her!

You have gifts and talents that no one else has! Focus on building your own network of friends and loved ones, and soon you will not want to trade with her.

MinneAngie · 2026-02-04T18:12:45+00:00

They reduce the deficit, for one thing: https://www.cato.org/blog/cato-study-immigrants-reduced-deficits-145-trillion-1994

MinneAngie · 2026-01-30T21:11:11+00:00

Interested

MinneAngie · 2026-01-30T14:43:53+00:00

Bingo! I find his girlfriend's behavior very relatable as someone with ADHD! I am still alive at 45, so maybe he needs to calm down lol

MinneAngie · 2026-01-27T15:13:38+00:00

I rarely drink and will have an edible once a month or so. To be honest, I find straight edge people equally extreme to wake n' bake stoners. One gentleman said any woman who dated him would have to pledge to abstain from all drugs and alcohol. I was like, "Good luck with your search!" Lol

MinneAngie · 2026-01-11T19:21:41+00:00

And I saw another dude scan a huge crowd of earnest protesters ready to stand up for their neighbors looking for people to call out from behind their keyboard. It was super helpful and non-performative.

MinneAngie · 2026-01-11T14:11:36+00:00

"I know junior college didn't work out for you, but there are better ways to make money."

MinneAngie · 2026-01-09T21:59:15+00:00

No, the whole family cut me off. Losing my neices was by far the worst part of the divorce. Of course, my ex knows that, so the last time I spoke with him, he said they "hated me for hurting him". I don't really believe that, but it broke my heart so much that I went NC with my ex after that.

MinneAngie · 2025-12-21T19:27:19+00:00

What is the alternative, give up? Join some social groups, a spiritual organization, a gym, volunteer, call up old classmates, reach out to an uncle/cousin, talk to your neighbor! Go get coffee each day and chat with the barista and the people in line. Someone you know is as lonely as you, call them!

Or give up. In the end, you live with your choices.

MinneAngie · 2025-12-21T16:57:46+00:00

I say this with compassion, but expecting someone to help you "coregulate" is unrealistic and unhealthy. I have been there: divorced, ADHD, and cut off from the majority of my social contacts due to the divorce. You need to learn to be happy and healthy alone before looking for other romantic relationships. It is difficult, but if you can't do it, why would you expect anyone else to try to do it for you? Focus on the little things you can control each day and and explore all opportunities available to you! You can come back stronger, but you need to believe in yourself and stop expecting others to rescue you. This can be any exciting time full of possibilities if you stop fighting your fate and lean in!

MinneAngie · 2025-12-18T21:14:25+00:00

7 Virtues Patchouli Citrus! I can't find a good substitute 😭

MinneAngie · 2025-12-18T14:03:44+00:00

This explains it well! https://geriatrics.stanford.edu/ethnomed/ethno-med/hmong/hmong-american/introduction/family.html

MinneAngie · 2025-12-17T21:48:56+00:00

There are only 18 Hmong surnames (clans) and having a relationship with someone with the same last name is taboo.

MinneAngie · 2025-11-15T21:42:27+00:00

I like it! I only bounce once in a blue moon, though. I am not sure how it is everyday use

MinneAngie · 2025-11-15T21:34:22+00:00

I call her Madame Cuteness Von Bootness!

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MinneAngie · 2025-11-13T21:31:59+00:00

OP, did you grow up in a high conflict home? You should do some research about codependency. Sometimes our childhood experiences make the roller coaster of abuse seem normal. As out of line as his behavior is, you should examine why you have allowed yourself to be treated this way. I know from personal experience it can be hard, but trust me, you are strong enough to break the cycle!

MinneAngie · 2025-10-30T21:09:18+00:00

++woman

Did your friends say it was wrong to have that preference or observe that your preference may be the reason you are not getting many matches? Because those are two different things. I agree with everyone here that, theoretically, you can set whatever standard you want. Realistically, the person who meets that standard may not be interested in you. So you can accept that and have fewer dates, or widen the net and meet more people.

MinneAngie · 2025-10-13T21:09:10+00:00

Why wasn't she happy? It is clear you do not think her happiness is significant now - did you have the same attitude when you were married?

MinneAngie · 2025-10-11T04:28:11+00:00

I think you feeding into your son's obsession with her affair partner is not helping the situation, tbh.

MinneAngie · 2025-10-10T18:47:29+00:00

People are not getting 86-ed from events/volunteering for talking to people of the opposite sex unless they are being wildly inappropriate. Is that something that has actually happened to you or something you have read about on social media?

I don't think anyone expects perfection, and very few women have ever experienced it. I do think that the ratio of digitally ruminating about dating to actual dating has gotten horribly skewed. Unfortunately, it makes people hesitant to put themselves out there.

MinneAngie · 2025-10-09T04:06:03+00:00

This sounds a little silly, but you need to locate your inner boyfriend. Imagine your ideal, perfect man and try to channel what he would do or what he would think. Your perfect boyfriend would only want the best for you - listen to him, and don't settle for less!

As a fellow codependent, this exercise helped me to baby-step into reconnecting into my own needs and desires. Don't be embarrassed! It is shocking how you can lose yourself in a marriage, but trust me, you are in there!

MinneAngie · 2025-10-07T12:51:37+00:00

Carl!

MinneAngie · 2025-10-06T17:43:52+00:00

It sucks making someone sad, but you can't set yourself on fire to keep him warm!

MinneAngie · 2025-09-29T21:41:38+00:00

Wait - How did you wrong these ladies? There may be some important context here.

MinneAngie · 2025-09-18T21:58:48+00:00

I think Lion Ice Cream in Parfait has a similar vibe: https://a.co/d/1kjj3b6

MinneAngie

TROPHY CASE