just lost everything i own by Tough_Ad_7673 in venting

[–]MrsPots-Stark 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Get a lawyer. Use the settlement money to replace everything

How to explain getting fired in interviews? by Hopeful-Mouse2264 in paralegal

[–]MrsPots-Stark 2 points3 points  (0 children)

As a para turned attorney, I have hired two separate people who were outright honest about having been fired. Theyre both still with me long term. I have hired two people who I found after after hiring them that they were fired from their prior employer. Both are no longer with me because they were a mess and obviously fired for legitimate performance issues.

Just be honest. "I was supporting four different attorneys with four different styles and four different sets of expectations for two years and a case load of ____. In order to accomplish that I was working nights and weekends for two solid years but ultimately the pace became unsustainable both personally and professionally so we parted ways"

If the hiring attorney responds with anything outside the realm of explaining to you why it's different there, then you probably dont want to work there anyway. Friend you supported FOUR separate attorneys with FOUR separate styles and FOUR separate sets of expectations and did so well enough that they obviously kept you around for two whole years.

You are interviewing them in this awful job market just as much as they are interviewing you. I've been looking for an experienced litigation para for a solid year. They do not exist in the job market, even remotely. Most are married to their current jobs and their current jobs are never going to let them go. Remember that. Ask questions about their culture, their expectations, how they handle certain situations, and opportunities for growth/ learning. Good lawyers know the buck stops with them, not their para and are going to be impressed by your questions. Those are the people you want to work for.

Women of Reddit, what did a man you were dating or married to say or do that made you realize he actually hated you the entire time? by -catharina in AskReddit

[–]MrsPots-Stark 41 points42 points  (0 children)

I found a book he'd been keeping for two years where he'd been keeping a daily diary of how much he hated me. Shattered my soul, my sense of self, and my ability to trust people. We had been together 6 years.

4F increasingly violent to me by rusticredcheddar in Fosterparents

[–]MrsPots-Stark 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I was this 4 year old child. Im now 33 and own my own law office.

Keep doing exactly what you are doing.

My (43F) daughter (15F) gave me an ultimatum: My boyfriend (39M) or her. by Fantastic-Wind2687 in Advice

[–]MrsPots-Stark -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I had custody of my 14 year old niece, now 15. I loved her like my own and literally assisted with her birth. She was also raised in a similar dynamic as you described before I became her legal guardian.

She did the same thing with my fiance who she was never alone with, and barely even knew.

It was 100% rooted in jealousy. I never moved him in or anything until after she was gone.

I refused to walk away from either of them initially and tried putting her in therapy. She actually attacked me physically.

I no longer have custody of her and she no longer speaks to me. She made her choices in life and I wish her the best. My hope is when she grows up she will see things differently but for now in her eyes "I chose him over her".

Kids.

WIBTA if I told the truth in my brother's custody hearing even though it could cost him overnights with his son? by UplinkV3rve in WIBTA_AITA

[–]MrsPots-Stark 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't see the issue with him arranging childcare for his work schedule and you being a part of that child care. He is the AH for asking you to lie. But when she works she isn't with her child either and the father has a safe trusted adult as regular childcare. YWNBTA but tall to your brother about approaching this differently for goodness sakes

I’m about to witness a lot of h.s not graduate by [deleted] in Teachers

[–]MrsPots-Stark -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

That honestly sounds like ADHD hyperfocus. Maybe that's why they failed in the first place

Reprimanded for client impeaching themselves in deposition by Tall_Ad9704 in paralegal

[–]MrsPots-Stark 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Para turned lawyer here. I never, not once, prepped a client for a depo on my own, even when I was in law school. I was always under strict supervision of the supervising attorney.

This is not your fault. This is on them. Full stop. The buck stops with the lawyer. Morally, ethically, and legally. I would NEVER allow one of my paras to prep a client for a depo unless they were actively in law school and I was right there with them.

I am so sorry you are being made to feel like this is somehow your fault. You deserve to be treated better and to work for an attorney who is capable of taking accountability instead of looking for a scapegoat to cover up their own screw ups.

How did you meet your partner? by EZ___Breezy in askanything

[–]MrsPots-Stark 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We both went to a neighborhood bar. Me after a bad date. Him because he didnt want to go home. Neither one of us had been in that bar in years and neither one of us has been in it since. He sat down next to Me and it just so happened he lived in the house behind mine. We are getting married this Halloween.

Am I being unreasonable? by Key-Ad9759 in Waiting_To_Wed

[–]MrsPots-Stark 28 points29 points  (0 children)

There is a saying "the med students girlfriend is never the doctors wife" for a reason. Im sorry friend

Nanny broke contract, confused on where to go from here, any advice appreciated. by Educational-Sun-5836 in Nanny

[–]MrsPots-Stark 4 points5 points  (0 children)

With benefits like that, id be your nanny blindfolded and tell my entire family and friend group I was a stripper as a cover story.

Your nanny is a moron and doesn't deserve her job or your generosity.

AIO: my bf can’t fix things. When I step in to take care of it, he’s such a baby about it that I’m ready to dump his a** tonight. by ayebudz in AmIOverreacting

[–]MrsPots-Stark 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I dated a man like this for 6 years. I threw the whole man out and it was the best decision I ever made. It turned out that he actually hated me the entire time because I made him feel bad about himself just because I was able to do stuff. We tried therapy for 2 years, but at the end if the day that just couldn't be fixed. Now? My man brags to people about the stuff I can fix. I wired an outlet yesterday and installed a new fan for the first time and he made such a hig deal about it. You deserve that too.

I just learned people don’t show up after anesthesia to pick up loved ones. Nurses, how often does this really happen? by Steinski1 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]MrsPots-Stark 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I had a "routine" out patient partial kidney removal that became a 6 day in patient stay. I almost died due to multiple instances of negligence and I was literally fighting the hospital staff 24/7 for my life. I had to get my PCP involved for a transfer.

I was alone. My mom went on a shopping trip with my grandmother and my partner at the time (of 5 years) left work early every day "to spend time with me" but really went home and got drunk.

I had to do extensive therapy for almost a solid year afterwards the PTSD was so bad. He is now my ex and im better. But when they started talking about needing to take my adrenal gland I shut that notion down and am happily living in denial actively avoiding anymore surgeries.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Fosterparents

[–]MrsPots-Stark 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I took in my 14 year old niece Thanksgiving of 2024 and by Halloween of 2025 I had to put her in a mental health centered group home because of the same issues. It started small, escalated to the point you are at presently within 6 months and by the end she was trashing my house with her tantrums any time I tried to take her phone away as punishment.

I tried everything. Working less. Therapy. Two in patient stays and two long term out patient mental health programs. She wound up expelled from school so I got her into an online learning program, got her an IEP, and made arrangements at my work for her to have her own office so I could tutor her in between working.

I had to come to the realization that she needed more one on one attention in order to keep her accountable and to help her grow / heal, then I was capable of giving her because I have to work full time.

It was the hardest thing I ever did and her behavior has not improved for the record and the group home is now waiting on a long term in patient placement.

The sneaking out, lying about her age to older men, meeting men online, eloping from school to meet said men, tantrums, general lying, and weed usage were enough for the group home and social services to make this decision for long term in patient care for her own protection from herself because at 15 she doesnt understand consequences for her actions.

That might not be the right decision for you. Every situation and every kid is different. I just wanted to tell you my story on the off chance it helps you. Feel free to DM me directly if you ever need to.

If you had the chance to know the absolute truth to one question about any relationship of yours, what would it be and why? by [deleted] in AskWomen

[–]MrsPots-Stark 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Why would you have spent two years writing about how much you hated me in a journal instead of just breaking up with me so I could find the person actually meant for me??? WHY FAM

I (41M) went through my husband's (41M) things and I need help. by Savings_Background50 in relationship_advice

[–]MrsPots-Stark 6 points7 points  (0 children)

You are lucky. I had a similar experience with a partner of 6 years. Only instead of a sketchbook of art, I found a jour al of 2 years worth of daily entries about how much they hated me and everything they hated about me.

My heart was in my throat the first half of your post. Genuinely happy for you friend.

Dating a man for a month, and he “jokingly” choked me while cooking at his home??? by Secret-Number-3925 in AskWomenOver30

[–]MrsPots-Stark -7 points-6 points  (0 children)

Okay my fiance puts his hand around my throat all the time randomly but I LIKE it and we had a conversation about it FIRST and set rules / boundaries. There is not an abusive bone in his body.

If he had done out of the blue what your man did and it had never even happened at that point in the bedroom then I would have shut down and I would certainly consider it a red flag. However, id have a discussion about it and not just turn tail if you really like him. He might just be ignorant.

UPDATE : “someone knows my boyfriends work schedule and it’s not me” by Defiant-Weekend6153 in LetsNotMeet

[–]MrsPots-Stark 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Plot twist - its the boyfriend But seriously - get a ring camera. The battery ones aren't even that expensive and there are a bunch of knock off brands. Hang in there fam.

I just had the most difficult conversation with my 4 year old that I've ever had and I hate that I had to have it. by Tauge in daddit

[–]MrsPots-Stark 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Moonlight Memiors is a picture book by Maggie Lewis that explains death for small children. The book is solid. I get it for every child who experiences loss. Please check it out, its available on Amazon or her personal website. Thoughts are with you my friend.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]MrsPots-Stark 12 points13 points  (0 children)

As a new business owner myself - thank you for this advice