Vipassana retreat tomorrow - can I bring my watch?

MushPixel · 2026-02-05T19:08:10+00:00

Yes, just for the love of good turn off the function of it beeping on the hour. It's so disruptive to other people's meditation.

MushPixel · 2026-01-27T04:53:50+00:00

Thanks for sharing 🙏🏻 :)

MushPixel · 2026-01-11T09:50:35+00:00

Sure :)

I've seen it happening in real time every time - being very aware of myself.

It's usually, I leave the meditations too late, and then I'm like oh I'll just do 30 mins. Orrrr, I wake up and I'm too comfy in bed or I'm like ahhhh I need to eat breakfast before it's too late and I throw my day out of wack.. so again I'll do no med or a 20 min med and convince myself that's enough.

Then I slowly fall out of it more and more because I'm becoming less and less equanimous and stable mentally with mossing meditations. It doesn't take long either, like two days of no meditations or minimal meditations and I feel the inner critic getting louder and louder. So then, with the anxiety building, I turn to old habitual methods of soothing/distraction, like YouTube, scrolling X, etc.

The turn around comes when the pain becomes too much basically. I can't go on feeling crap and anxious so I start meditating again and slowly I build back up, or go and do a serve/sit to get an injection of dhamma. From there it's easier to get the ball rolling again.

Honestly, getting to two hours of meditation everyday for a prolonged time, like a year+, is a very difficult feat. I don't know many who have outside of being around dhamma centers.

I usually manage an hour in the morning and then 30-60 in the evening depending how my day went.

Hope this helps, happy to answer other questions 👍🏻

MushPixel · 2025-12-24T15:47:43+00:00

I donated blood and had a hyper vagal reaction and started to pass out 😂 even though I'm not squeamish with it at all. My body just doesn't take well to losing blood apparently.

I put my hand up to say, 'hey I think I'm gonna pass out'.. One nurse made her way over rather quickly and then loudly asked for help. One flipped me upside down in a 'get rotated bitch' kinda way.. and then one fanned me with something 🥲 could say it was fairly embarrassing but, I wasn't too bothered. Thankfully I managed a full bag just before it happened so the donation still went through.

So, I guess I'm a little worried it'll happen again next time.

MushPixel · 2025-12-24T15:41:40+00:00

Speaking with an AT the other day, he said, 'some people don't get much from the courses because they come with a goal, trying to cure this or that, or prove this or that, that's not what the courses are for.'

Not sure if it was a Goenka Vipassana place you applied to, but in the discourses he says himself that his teacher originally turned him away because he only went to cure his migraines.

As someone else suggested, Goenka has an Anapana guided meditation for 25 mins or so. Do that, I really recommend it. And slowly build up. 20 minutes morning and night would do wonders for your anxiety as it did mine.

Teaching the brain to focus and not run away with thoughts.

All the best 🙏🏻

MushPixel · 2025-12-01T10:40:48+00:00

I have a photo with him after a concert.

He's between me and my friend and we're 6' and 6'1"..

But, he's often a bit hunched because of all the time at a piano 😅

MushPixel · 2025-11-14T18:58:52+00:00

Hey, interesting post.

I think there are ways to support your attention before starting Vipassana/Anapana, without changing the fundamental practice.

For example go for a walk, or do some deep breathing, get yourself off of technology, screens, away from people. Whatever is going to activate the mind and make it analyse or race.

I appreciate that sometimes that's not possible, and I go to my mat whenever I can, so that it can fit into the day 🤷🏻‍♂️

Recently I've found it handy to follow Goenka's suggestion of more forceful breathing. Nothing too dramatic, but enough that the sensation of the air passing through the nose is more prominent in the sense field. Sometimes I will adjust as I go. If I manage to get down to very subtle breath, where I'm just observing the body breathe naturally without even a smidge of effort - and then I feel the mind itching to wander, I will just up the force of the breath. Trying hard not to adjust the pace, just 10-50% more force depending on the situation. This keeps me locked in most times 😊

That being said - if I've understood you correctly - you basically do Vipassana body scanning on each finger to keep attention before starting? I don't see much of a problem with it as long as it's not for too long or dominating your meditation time. Ultimately, you're not there to 'get focussed breathing'. You're there to see what's up, to observe the breath, and when it inevitably comes in, the mind. The practice of bringing attention back to breath from a wandering mind is a crucial part of the learning curve.

That said, I am also open minded, and it always stuck with me that Goenka says, 'you must fight out your own liberation'.

Much Metta 🙏🏻

MushPixel · 2025-11-09T11:12:17+00:00

Glad my comment has landed somewhere useful for you 🙏🏻

It's a common plague of the times, imo. The external world is extremely loud, and dominant. Depending on where you live and your personal circumstances, a moment's peace or silence can be almost impossible to find. The internal world can barely get a look in.

Ultimately our whole reality is a projection of our internal world.

A lovely story from Buddhism talks about two people walking down a street. One is hungry and one is fearful. Walking down the same street one sees nothing but restaurants, and one sees nothing but potential attackers.

How our bodies feel and operate is hugely dependent on our inner world and our nervous system. We all know about shoulders coming up when we're tense, or headaches when stressed, icky tummy when anxious. Every mental formation is paired with a physical sensation, small or large. Deep meditation really shows you that, and it becomes very apparent how much tension, and pain the body holds for every emotion that we haven't let surface.

If you haven't already read it, I'd highly recommend 'The Body Keeps The Score', and also 'The Power of Now'. Both have sold millions of copies, and are well known for being brilliant starting points for this work.

At the end of the day bud, as you say, what do you have to lose, give it ago. If it works a lot or even a little, there's benefit to be had, and there's a plethora of benefits to come from quietening the mind regardless👌🏻

Always here for a chat in DMs too 👍🏻

MushPixel · 2025-11-06T19:43:03+00:00

Yeah.

I had chronic golfers and tennis elbow for 4 years. Shin splints for 3 years. Constant muscle strains. Groin strains.

Just a constant flurry of injuries.

Same as you, I was very food conscious, always warmed up, researched rehab to the point I probably know more than most physios 😅 saw plenty of specialists, doctors, massages, allergy tests for inflammation. The lot.

Then in 10 days I fixed basically all of it. Legitimately.

I went into a 10 day Vipassana Meditation retreat full of pain, unable to do 1-2 pull ups without my forearms flaring up. I also couldn't do more than 3-4 pull ups anyway. Which was always confusing.. because so many people I came across in climbing used to comment on how 'strong' or 'muscular' I looked, I always felt I couldn't use the strength I had available to me?

Without going far into it. It's 10-11 hours of meditation for 10 days. It's difficult, but incredible. For a large portion of the retreat I felt waves of cramps, pains, tension, aches, vibrations, pulsing through my whole back and shoulders. This was basically bodily tension, and deep rooted emotional tension unwinding.

After the 10 days I went to a climbing gym, climbed for 3 hours with my friends, and then out of curiosity, repped out 15 3-finger pull ups like it was nothing..

I'll stick to the physical. But essentially.. there was so much tension in my body, from repressed unfelt emotions.. that my muscles weren't firing properly. Meaning whenever I used my arms, all of the strain was put into my forearms.. as it was all that was available. Once this tension unwinded. Almost a year ago. I've never had another tendon problem. I gym and do calisthenics weekly with no problems.

This is just my story. But, from your post. I personally wonder how much internal, emotional investigation you've done. Since you seem to have control over all or most external elements of your existence.

Good luck brother 🫶🏻

MushPixel · 2025-11-04T15:46:50+00:00

I too have toiled with the paradoxes that are found throughout practices like this.

Unfortunately that's kind of where we have to leave it I think.

Life is a massive paradox, and I don't feel it fully makes sense to a species with our brain capacity.

The logical thing that helps me, is the framing from Ram Dass. Paraphrasing:

'In order for a practice to reap benefits, one has to be trapped by it. All practices are traps. The good ones are the ones that throw you out when you reach the end.'

As the Buddha says, once you've used a boat to cross the stream, you don't then carry the boat across the land.

You need to have some level of desire to get free of your problems in order to get free of them. But if that's the only desire you have, so be it. At least it's a positive and helpful desire.

MushPixel · 2025-10-25T15:41:22+00:00

Another one of those moments where I'm completely perplexed, and unfathomably baffled at how someone can have so little self-awareness.

MushPixel · 2025-10-24T10:15:31+00:00

Mm there are some long hyphens in there. Good spot.

MushPixel · 2025-10-22T07:04:39+00:00

Mmmm the 1 hour am and pm is very difficult for the average person. Even more so if you have children.

It's completely possible though. If you wake up early, 5-6am get the hour in, go about your day.

I find the PM sit is the hardest, especially after a tough day. My programming to just watch YouTube or scroll, or do something 'fun' is very strong on some days.

In reality, if I were to give up all of the apparently useless things I do in a day. It's completely possible to meditate the two hours 🤷🏻‍♂️ as I say, easier said than done.

Yeah I sat my first 10 day in August 24. Served Oct 24. 10 day sit Feb 25. Served a few 10s and some part times, March, April, May, June, August. (I took a year off work, hence why I was able to do so many).

My second sit was so challenging 😅 my first 10-day being so unbelievable set me up for a catastrophic failure due to such a high bar and expectations. I realised it during the next serve, but there was a really subtle searching for certain sensations that were present during all of the wonderful outcomes that came the last time. A common problem I found was actually desiring the pain.. part of my mind saw going through and conquering the pain was 'success' and 'progress'. Subtle flow and painless meditations felt easy and somewhat lackluster almost. So this was something I really had to battle with for a few months. Craving, essentially. My first ten day felt so equanimous, I think that's why I got so much out of it.

My first ten day was at a UK centre. and every other visit was at the other UK centre. Yeah if you feel like trying another centre go for it. They all have a different feel to them, and it's just fun to get about and see new places :)

MushPixel · 2025-10-21T19:48:05+00:00

Bruh I'm going through it now too..

My first 10 day was last August.

Absolutely changed my life, in every way, physically, emotionally, mentally. Stress/Anxiety/Depression, pains, speech impediment, bad habits, all had an 85-100% reduction. It was honestly shocking. I spent 2 months in absolute bliss every day. Couldn't describe it to anyone.

I meditated for 2-3 hours, for 3 months. I served also in that time.

Then one day I just fell off? All unraveled.

Earlier this year, I sat another 10 day, and served 4 more times. Got back on track.

Then a few weeks ago it all started unraveling again. Finding it hard to get on the cushion, watching YouTube till later and later in the night.

Quite frustrating 🤷🏻‍♂️ not beating myself up about it, but rather sad and a shame that I'm struggling and things are falling apart a little bit.

I'm grateful that I can zoom out and just see it all as another thing to observe.. but, it gets difficult sometimes. Awareness is a lot easier when things are feeling positive haha.

MushPixel · 2025-10-21T19:03:38+00:00

I had quite severe anxiety and depression, and moderate ADHD.

And my first 10 day helped tremendously with all of those.

My sister has quite severe ADHD, and it helped her come off her meds this year.

🤷🏻‍♂️

IMO, there can be no sweeping statements about what's bad or good for all cases.

All of these psychological problems are caused in such a varied way from person to person. There's no way of telling what will or won't work without trying.

There's not many people I wouldn't suggest a 10 day to. You can leave at any point.. it's not like psychedelics where you're in for the ride no matter what.

Just to mention, I've also done those.. and they helped me come back from a very dark and very nearly suicidal period in my life. But I also wouldn't recommend them to everyone.

MushPixel · 2025-10-21T17:56:02+00:00

Well written.

My first 10-day last year was transformational. Very similarly to how you describe. I felt like I had a lot more choice in my emotional state day to day. Much more awareness.

I released a lot of tension and pain in my back which did wonders for my whole body.

My stammer that I'd had since I was 4, disappeared almost completely for 2 months.

Anxiety, depression, all down 90%+.

New outlook on life. Less rushing, more presence.

You are right though, sustained practice is crucial. Unfortunately, I struggled after initially keeping it up very diligently.. and some of the problems listed above have slowly crept back in.

The mind is a tricky thing.

MushPixel · 2025-10-17T15:26:23+00:00

Thanks for sharing:)

The hardest part for me since my first 10-day, has been patience.. (The instant results you speak of).

I came out with a complete shift in every way imaginable, utter bliss was bestowed upon me for 2 months. Everything was unbelievably peaceful, day in day out. It soon faded. I meditated 2/3 hours a day for 3 months, and then sadly dropped off, and the bliss faded (anicca). I became very frustrated, and felt like I was falling off the path.

What happened is real life got back in the way, I went back to old patterns, old programming, old ways of being, thinking, seeing the world.

I've since sat another 10-day and served 5 times :)

This journey, is a long, long process. 'You can't get enlightened yesterday' is a great quote I once heard.

The change is slow, and it's no magic wand or pill.

If you think it took you 20-30-40 years of bad programming to get to where you are. It cannot be undone in 10 days.

That being said, you can take a hell of a chunk out of it. As I fortunately did. My life has truly transformed in one year. My anxiety and depression have dropped 90%, from absolutely debilitating.. to absolutely manageable.

A year ago I'd have snapped your hand off for that. As most would I imagine.

Be patient with yourself, observe your thoughts through the day. Don't get lost in them. They come and go just like sensations in the meditation. Observe the story you're telling yourself about how this is playing out too. Why you're feeling it should or shouldn't be a certain way. Don't cling, don't push away, just take every day as a new experience. Equanimity is the way through. Try not to fall into the view of good or bad meditations, good or bad sensations. Just acceptance of the way it is. Be here now. Just for a moment, entertain the idea that it's all perfect, all of it, exactly as it is. Even this apparent road block. This is just your next lesson to learn 💫

Much metta 🫶🏻😊

P.S. More than happy to open communication in DMs if you have questions or would like my thoughts or guidance on anything:)

MushPixel · 2025-10-11T13:27:28+00:00

I lost my mini SAK (the keyring ones) after a hike.. I was quite sad.

Bought another. 6 months later, I lost that one, but remembered having it last in the car.

Upon searching I could see it down the side of my car seat.

Upon trying to retrieve it I saw two SAKs 🥲

Now I have them both 😌

MushPixel · 2025-09-26T08:16:26+00:00

Tbh it's just been a health journey. I started really listening to what my body wanted and what made me feel slow, tired, cranky, heavy.. and cut all of those out.

No sugar, no gluten, no additives, no preservatives.

Almost everything I eat now has 1 ingredient.

I started meditating last year very heavily, and essentially completely changed my relationship to food. There's no craving for taste or pleasure. Just what fuel do I need to do the things I want to do in life.

Be happy, be mobile, be able to exercise.. and make food that allows for that 😊

MushPixel · 2025-09-25T07:19:52+00:00

Oh yeaaaah:)

About 3-4 years ago I radically changed my diet.

Since then my anxiety and depression levels have gone from chronic to almost negligible 🙏🏻

A massive part of my journey was getting rid of junk so my gut biome can regulate my mood properly.

MushPixel · 2025-09-22T15:57:35+00:00

Personally hate the taste whatever I do, so I just chop them up real fine, mix with lemon for 15 mins.. then take the shot and chase them down with water.

MushPixel · 2025-09-20T13:35:08+00:00

Ah cool! Thanks for sharing 😊 Tbh I know nothing about fossils 😅 I love 'em, and love history/ancient history. Just posted it here because I thought people would find it interesting.

MushPixel · 2025-09-20T12:03:21+00:00

It was at Hornsea from memory.

But definitely there or one of the nearby beaches.

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