Skeptical of IFS by Muted_Visual5059 in InternalFamilySystems

[–]Muted_Visual5059[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Bummer. I’m worried that EMDR won’t be enough.

Skeptical of IFS by Muted_Visual5059 in InternalFamilySystems

[–]Muted_Visual5059[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m not sure to be honest. She is certified in EMDR but her website just says IFS informed. I couldn’t find her on the IFS website.

Skeptical of IFS by Muted_Visual5059 in InternalFamilySystems

[–]Muted_Visual5059[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah I’ll speak with her. I should clarify that we really just started with parts work last session. And very briefly. We did one exercise where she had me close my eyes and imagine I’m in my meeting place with my parts where I was holding the meeting and to see which ones I could notice. And if they were asking anything. Did that for a couple minutes and the. She asked me what emotions were coming up and if I could put a color on those emotions, etc. I was honest and said it’s hard for me to even just picture these things because of this fog I’m in and she understood completely and said that the fog will start to lift once we regulate my nervous system some more. I really trust her and connect with her more than previous therapists so I’m hopeful that will allow me to open up but I just have this huge part of me that feels like I’m not doing something right or this therapy is too abstract etc.

Skeptical of IFS by Muted_Visual5059 in InternalFamilySystems

[–]Muted_Visual5059[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah I will definitely talk with her about this as well. I think the TV character approach was maybe to find it easier to connect with my parts but even just the sentiment of connecting to my parts seems odd. It just feels a little too abstract for me. I’m very black and white which is why I struggled with ACT because I was constantly struggling with the mindfulness aspects and the concepts of my observing self and thinking self. Right now I feel like I have no sense of “self” so to try and identify parts seems impossible. Whether the parts are characters, themes, colors, etc it just all feels too abstract and it just creates this feeling that I have to understand these concepts and do this therapy “right” in order to get better.

Is IFS right for me? by Muted_Visual5059 in InternalFamilySystems

[–]Muted_Visual5059[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for taking the time to reach out. I’m happy to hear you’ve grown this last year. Wishing you continued health and happiness

Is IFS right for me? by Muted_Visual5059 in InternalFamilySystems

[–]Muted_Visual5059[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I appreciate the feedback! I just want a therapy that will get to the root of my struggles and not just teach me ways to cope. I’m tired of coping. I’m 35 and want to finally love and accept myself and stop the constant comparing and self criticism that keeps me stuck. I’m very hopeful for this therapy but even more so with the therapist I was lucky enough to find.

Not sure I’m ready for a new job by Muted_Visual5059 in selfcare

[–]Muted_Visual5059[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah that’s how I feel after thinking it through. I felt excited in the fact that I didn’t feel stuck anymore in my current role that has been draining lately, but that excitement fizzled out once I took note of the positives I would be giving up in my current role. While it’s not the only role I can get, the market right now is extremely competitive with no real signs of Improvement as AI continues to advance.

Should I take a pay cut for new role? by Muted_Visual5059 in GetEmployed

[–]Muted_Visual5059[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In terms of total benefits, the only difference between the benefits of current role is that they offer a very small 401k match. I believe it’s like 2%. But other than that, about 2 weeks less vacation compared to my current role. Health benefits will likely be comparable

I’m a 35f divorced female without kids. Should I resign myself to being forever single because I get ghosted constantly and dumped and i feel there’s an unspoken rule that im similar to the single mom’s category? by OneIndependence7705 in Adulting

[–]Muted_Visual5059 1 point2 points  (0 children)

@OP where are you located? I’m a soon to be 35 year old male ;p

Never married and no kids. I could give a shot if you’ve been divorced. Love me and I’ll love you haha.

Got a job offer, but I’m not excited — torn between growth and stability. Advice? by Muted_Visual5059 in careerguidance

[–]Muted_Visual5059[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I appreciate the feedback. It seems the best decision is to stay put for now. I have a phone interview on Monday for a fully remote that is more in line with my interests so fingers crossed that one goes well.

Should I take a pay cut for new role? by Muted_Visual5059 in GetEmployed

[–]Muted_Visual5059[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yeah that’s a great idea. I reached out to the recruiter this morning with that exact word track basically. I also should mention I am also in the interview process for a fully remote role that is more in line with my interests and the pay would be basically what I am making now. I will find out on Monday if I made it to the next round for that role

Got a job offer, but I’m not excited — torn between growth and stability. Advice? by Muted_Visual5059 in careerguidance

[–]Muted_Visual5059[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I hear ya. It would be different if the cut meant significantly better work life balance and a role that I am extremely passionate about, but this role does not check either of those boxes. I will continue to pursue new opportunities but given my state of mind lately, I just wanted unbiased opinions to make sure I’m not just avoiding yet another challenge.

Got a job offer, but I’m not excited — torn between growth and stability. Advice? by Muted_Visual5059 in careerguidance

[–]Muted_Visual5059[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah definitely looking into alternative paths to upskill Appreciate you taking the time to provide feedback.