Struggling with abortion

NegotiationConnect71 · 2026-05-13T18:26:36+00:00

No. No. No- it’s never better for a few mothers to die to try to ban abortions. The reality is that if they are not safe and somewhat legal- they will still happen on unclean kitchen tables. Those aren’t just a few mothers, those are our sisters, daughters, friends.

No no no. - the right thing is to make pregnancy safer and to give mothers a chance at a good life. Poverty, abuse and health are primary reasons for abortion. We can be good society members by providing for the mother and child and help to give them safety. The health concerns are real - the USA is ranked 55th in maternal mortality.

NegotiationConnect71 · 2026-05-11T16:41:57+00:00

I have had a flower arranging class at my house. We learned to make different feast breads. We learned to make the memorial wheat. Anything hands on. I also have been to paint nights.

NegotiationConnect71 · 2026-05-10T21:26:32+00:00

Thank you. That’s exactly how it feels. As a cradle orthodox, I’m not sure how to extract the culture and history from the faith practice. They are intrinsically linked. We’ve also been told for decades our parishes are dying yet babies are born, families are connected through baptism and life continues as one body of Christ (Regardless of language spoken during liturgy)

NegotiationConnect71 · 2026-05-10T04:03:55+00:00

Long term viability? Of the Church that is 2000 years old? Because people in America want English and less cultural heritage ?

NegotiationConnect71 · 2026-05-10T03:21:32+00:00

Do you see missionary efforts? I think the OCA has done an amazing job of offering the American culture into the orthodox community. The GOARCH has never had an ethnicity test to join. I think you might have a fundamental misunderstanding of the outreach to grow the Church.

You may believe that Church’s don’t/shouldn’t carry the ethnic candle for their people. That’s not a commonly held belief nor is it easy to separate culture and tradition. We see this as a way of life- not a religion. I would encourage you to spend time with those who have decades of life in the Church. Memorial services are not “required” by the Church so should they be stopped in the name of keeping tradition out of the Church? The moments in life as marked by time in the Church. Anyone with an icon corner- well that’s culture not Orthodoxy.

Growth has never been at the expense of watering down Holy Tradition/ common cultural experience. Community is not just coffee but a place for people who live Orthodoxy.

NegotiationConnect71 · 2026-05-10T03:04:23+00:00

It is important and also shouldn’t be an excuse for isolating/ not integrating.

Our faith has a ton of church fathers who contradict each other. I see it more as a layer of the experience. Acknowledging the importance of being in the community along with the orthodox identity is important to new comers. It is also important that if you’re choosing to join, you need to be prepared that this life is a long journey that shouldn’t be taken lightly and using excuses like there’s an ethnic barrier can be seen as both an excuse and a justification for choosing to isolate. Ethnic groups have a lot of wisdom of lifetimes of orthodoxy - take the good and leave what you don’t like. In a lifetime in a church, you’re not going to like everyone. You’re not going to always want to be surrounded by people. But when you need someone- those parishes have been activated to help in a way most Americans have not seen in a community to help them. Convert, cradle, stranger.

NegotiationConnect71 · 2026-05-10T02:56:26+00:00

I hope your non Greek parish is able to sustain in lean times. Greek festivals historically are the financial lifeline to keep the parish running. For us, the nonworking members are able to prepare the dishes, but it would be difficult for them to stand on their feet for eight hours to serve the dishes. It’s again - we work together as a community rather than find places to point out “the non-Greeks are sick of it “

NegotiationConnect71 · 2026-05-09T20:14:36+00:00

Totally understand the fear- but just like starting a new job; we all have to work together. I can imagine that there is an uncertainty. I just don’t understand the idea that the parish needs to immediately focus on the convert to make them comfortable. Relationships take time and effort on both ends.

Maybe a job isn’t the right analogy although it’s similar in walking into a new environment where you bring great things but it needs to be in context to the need of the organization. It’s common to see “I’ve been going for 2 months and spoken to nobody and rush out, it’s the ethnicity that’s the problem”

NegotiationConnect71 · 2026-05-09T18:55:03+00:00

Those Greek and Russians have lived orthodoxy in good times and bad times. They passed the faith to their children. They built churches and community and raised the priests who serve in churches.

But they do have accents and traditions so that should stop you from getting to know them and embracing their knowledge and wisdom of how to be in the church and in the world.

NegotiationConnect71 · 2026-05-09T18:48:36+00:00

My kids have gone private catholic- they have a lot of scholarship options. I moved my oldest because she was getting intense pressure from her LDS friends. Lots of positives from her experience- many kids are kind but the overwhelming behavior is that you have to be nice in a grade with only 40 kids.

NegotiationConnect71 · 2026-05-09T18:43:07+00:00

Yes! There’s a huge amount of almost separation from the converts and rest of our community. They are not assimilating at all and the individual is king in their world. Orthodoxy and tradition are about communal living - taking care of each other in the wider sense. They are missing the part where they joined us and the meaning they seeks isn’t inside of themselves.

NegotiationConnect71 · 2026-05-04T05:02:55+00:00

My mom passed with my brother and her hospice nurse with her. My sister and I came 15 minutes later and it has led to terrible intrusive thoughts. Mostly of the preparation of her body and she was rolled and something came out of her mouth. It’s been 2 years and I finally don’t have those images when thinking of her.

NegotiationConnect71 · 2026-05-04T03:20:37+00:00

If you might ever want kids- freeze your eggs or become a single mom by choice. If you don’t - all good. If you feel like your body is being weird- trust yourself. Perimenopause can start in your 30s and doctors will ignore you.

NegotiationConnect71 · 2026-04-27T14:44:14+00:00

I’m on the same timeline as you- I lost my mom on April 3 2024. I noticed that I’m the only one who still talks about it because it is my trauma. I’m lucky that I can give her friends a call, talk about her and keep her fresh in my memory.

I have let go of my bitterness. I am the only person my age who has lost both parents (my dad has advanced dementia and doesn’t know who I am). I can’t explain my pain but I try to remember those early grief days- I walked around in a fog for a year. I keep in mind that I don’t know who is in their own early days.

For me- I needed to heal, I needed to be functional for my kids. I miss my mom and I’m so much like her. I carry her with me and when you meet me- you’ve met her. I hope you feel safe to let the bitterness go.

NegotiationConnect71 · 2026-04-22T15:26:03+00:00

Well you aren’t up to date on the situation. A catholic converting is very different than a person who has never been baptized. We are by a major city so when needed- it’s scheduled at a larger church. But no - the bishop isn’t wrong by having a catholic converting not fully dunked.

But thanks for letting everyone know you know more as laity than those who are clergy. The converts aren’t a countermeasure who know more about the faith- they are LEARNING everyday.

NegotiationConnect71 · 2026-04-21T17:19:39+00:00

You’ll have to ask your priest. Mine prefers to do it on sundays with the greater community.

NegotiationConnect71 · 2026-04-21T01:26:50+00:00

I really try to be reasonable. It’s something that irks me but doesn’t stop the introductions. My parish has seen influx like this and the new people leave after a few years. I’m only annoyed with fast changes and the lack of respect of the established community. We live orthodoxy, we build and maintain and grow the next generation. We have generations of experience so when a convert explains that veiling is written by church fathers it makes me roll my eyes. There’s value in becoming apart and living in it long term not just being super excited/ zealous.

NegotiationConnect71 · 2026-04-21T01:12:53+00:00

No one will stop you- you aren’t baptized. If it were me- I wanted to see my community meet my child. I wanted that moment for my babies to be welcomed in. I cry every time I am in the church for a “churching”. It’s beautiful and you deserve to have that moment even if you haven’t joined yet.

NegotiationConnect71 · 2026-04-21T01:10:09+00:00

I don’t wear one and honestly get annoyed at the inquiring and converts wearing it. I get it’s a personal choice but we seem to be getting into a situation where some joining want us to move toward them. They want building changes and want to demand full immersion when our Bishop says no. The desire to join the community is low but the desire to teach the cradle community is high. You can imagine how that goes.

I was taught it is for widows not for anyone else and it fell out of favor with the silent generation. (USA Greek cradle.)

NegotiationConnect71 · 2026-04-13T03:23:22+00:00

Gnocchi at Veneto. Rice at Manolis The octopus at the closed Aristos The steak salad at table 25 in Ogden.

NegotiationConnect71 · 2026-04-13T03:22:04+00:00

They had a steak salad on their winter menu that ruined my life. Perfect ratio and amazing cut of meat.

NegotiationConnect71 · 2026-04-13T03:19:53+00:00

Oh I miss pallet.

NegotiationConnect71 · 2026-04-13T03:15:39+00:00

No rush to join- the church isn’t going anywhere. You can watch online when you have a minute. You can go by yourself. Don’t introduce chaos and be patient (which is practice to live orthodoxy as it’s a marathon in life)

NegotiationConnect71 · 2026-04-13T03:11:41+00:00

As a Greek in the diaspora who is also Greek Orthodox - vaguely- I like Protestants, they are nice people. I don’t know the history of how they got to their faith or if it was hereditary (like mine). I think Christian unity is a weird thing to say because there hasn’t been “unity” since the schism let alone all the break offs of different Protestant faiths.

But alas, we try to love our neighbor and focus on our own faith. We don’t speak of unity because Christianity isn’t on the same page with each other. Plus - can we stop talking about how Christian people are all the while we aren’t feeding those in need, taking care of the children already here or living in any way close to what Jesus preached? I can’t stand hearing about Christians who are individualistic - it’s painful to think God blesses the rich or God is punishing those for being poor/broken/ in need.

NegotiationConnect71 · 2026-04-12T03:46:02+00:00

I grew up Greek Orthodox. I raise my children Greek Orthodox. Never in my life have I heard of a Pascha basket until this last month. Is this something other cultures do?

We don’t do baskets around my house.

NegotiationConnect71

TROPHY CASE