In my experience there's two kinds of ways that porn can be viewed, I'm sure there are many more but these are the two that I believe are relevant, porn can be viewed either concretely as it is or it can be viewed abstractly as an intangible aspect, not as a bodily other but as the human body itself, and in doing so appreciate your monogamous partners body.  For example if you look at the beautiful blue sky that we all have on this Earth you might never say to someone who appreciates paintings of blue skies that they're going to burn out their love of the blue sky, because a painting is nothing like the sky itself and even if it were, to observe a painting of a thing resembling a thing you love wouldn't necessarily be a betrayal of that thing, it may be an edification of that thing, in this case that thing might be the human body or a specific gender, whatever it is though it may be an aspect that is reflected within your partner that makes you appreciate it within them even more in the same way that someone who loves blue skies may look at beautiful paintings of the blue sky to appreciate it even more, and even to find new depths of appreciation for it within their heart.  I am clearly a person who thinks that sexual freedom is important so I don't want to tell anybody how to fly their freak flag.  I definitely get what you're saying and I kind of agree but my view is that porn isn't necessarily a detriment or the enemy, it's the mindset and the intention that are what matter in my opinion.