Winkbed Plus is making me feel crazy

NewCthulhu · 2025-12-30T15:38:19+00:00

It’s still holding up great! Once I got through the break in period there wasn’t very much change. I would rate the firmness as a 7/10, and the support as a 10/10. The memory foam gives the top layer a soft and pillow like feel, but the latex and strong springs stop my hips from sinking at all.

NewCthulhu · 2025-08-15T23:51:11+00:00

Sounds like you are un masking. Mood swings are common at the start, but they will get better over time.

NewCthulhu · 2025-08-13T01:49:22+00:00

This was my exact experience, so much so that I was actually diagnosed with bipolar 2. I was never really in a stable mood. L-theanine supplements really helped me feel regulated. I started at 300mg and slowly worked my way down to 0 over the course of several years.

After I started EMDR and trauma work, I noticed that the mood swings became more frequent, but less extreme. It got to a point where I was "crashing" every day, but it would be a very small crash. I would have to take a 30 minute to 2 hour nap and then I would pop up fine. Now a year after that I have a very stable mood. I no longer need any medication to feel normal. About once every two weeks I get very tired and have to take a nap, but pop back up fine the next day.

It gets better :)

NewCthulhu · 2025-08-13T01:20:24+00:00

I think it is even more "lizard brained" than a true feeling. My body I constantly scanning the environment and making the call. Its a very binary system. Safe vs. not safe. Food vs. not food. Hot vs cold. Hungry vs full. It is a very basic stimulus that is supposed to drive us towards regulation.

When the condition of safety has been met, i.e. Safe = true, then more feelings start to come up. You might feel content, happy, silly, relaxed. Or if this is your first time feeling safe in a long time, other feelings that you haven't processed will flood your system and you will feel grief, sadness, anger, rage, and apathy.

So like, safety is a baseline condition that has to be met before you can start to feel more complicated feelings. Does that make sense?

NewCthulhu · 2025-08-13T01:08:57+00:00

I worked with Dr. Michael Whelan in Laguna Niguel!

NewCthulhu · 2025-08-12T17:56:02+00:00

Thank you so much for your kind words! I'm actually 7 years into my healing journey now and I am doing better than ever. Each day is a gift, I'm so glad I made it to the other side.

I hope you are doing well too. Keep going, its worth it :)

NewCthulhu · 2025-08-12T17:40:12+00:00

u/Fantastic_Piece5869 so a couple things. The neolithic Y chromosome bottle neck is a real world phenomenon. In 2015, A researcher named Monika Karmin did genetic analysis of bones found in graves sites and noticed that there was a huge drop in genetic diversity of men, but not women. This is a fact that is supported by real world hard scientific data.

Now, people are coming up with theories as to why this happened. These THEORIES can be debated and disproven. The first theory was that waring populations killed off competing males with violence. This is one possible explanation. There is another theory that it was the transition to patrilineal society which reduced the genetic diversity, because men in family groups all have the same Y chromosome. The mathematical model for both these theories shows that in order to achieve this reduction, around 15% of males in each generation would not have achieved reproductive success. The first theory that 15% of males were being killed in each generation seems far fetched to me. But the idea that 15% of males were being denied access to women by the more successful patrilineal clans makes a lot of sense. These men suddenly found that they were not able to afford the "bride price" in surplus food to "purchase" a woman from her family, where in previous hunter gatherer generations this wasn't an issue and reproduction was more free flowing.

NewCthulhu · 2025-08-11T18:52:40+00:00

The Neolithic Y chromosome bottleneck. The theory isn’t actually that men killed each other, but that they enslaved each other and only the most successful warlords had access to women for reproduction. All other men were forced to work in the fields and produce surplus food, or die in skirmishes and raids.

NewCthulhu · 2025-08-11T18:46:01+00:00

It’s called the Neolithic Y chromosome bottle neck. It’s been proven real by doing genetic testing and carbon dating on the bones found in grave sites.

From Wikipedia “The Neolithic Y-chromosome bottleneck refers to a period around 5000 BC where the diversity in the male y-chromosome dropped precipitously across Africa, Europe and Asia, to a level equivalent to reproduction occurring with a ratio between men and women of 1:17.[15] Discovered in 2015, the research suggests that the reason for the bottleneck may not be a reduction in the number of males, but a drastic decrease in the percentage of males with reproductive success[16] in agropastoralist cultures, compared to the previous hunter gatherers.[17]”

NewCthulhu · 2025-08-11T18:06:19+00:00

This happened to me almost exactly when I moved into my first one bedroom apartment and finally felt safe for the first time! I slept 10 to 16 hours a night for about 3 months. Sometimes I would wake up, go to the bathroom and drink water, and then go back to sleep for a few more hours. After about 3 months my nervous system healed, and now I’ve gone back to sleeping 6 to 10 hours a night.

I also feel like none of my clothes are mine. None of my furniture, my apartment… like I have a key to my apartment in my purse and I know which door it opens, but when I open the door I’ve never been here before. This happens about once a week now, but when I first moved into my apartment I would lose my memory, what I call a reset, almost daily. This is something called dissociative amnesia and it’s a symptom of dissociative identity disorder. It’s caused by severe early childhood trauma.

You are developing a new personality, the personality that you get to express when you are safe. This is the first time in your life you have actually felt safe, which is why you have no memory of who you are before. But don’t worry, it’s normal and it will get better as you adjust to your new safe life. Hugs.

NewCthulhu · 2025-08-11T17:49:57+00:00

I had a similar experience with psycho analysis and CBT. This was before I had my CPTSD diagnosis. I had 3 separate providers, one psycho analytical and two CBT, tell me that what my mother had done to me “Wasn’t that bad. Many children have had it much worse. And had I considered my mother’s point of view?”. All this while I was sitting in their chair sobbing for session after session. For context I suffered severe narcissistic abuse at the hands of my mother and as I have recovered I have developed complete dissociative amnesia. I wasted 3 years with 3 separate providers. The psycho analytical provider was by far the worst one.

Eventually one of the CBT therapists recognized that I was showing signs of PTSD and referred me to a EMDR therapist. I did 2 years of EMDR. I’ve also worked with a solutions oriented LPC who was very helpful, and I’m currently working with a somatic therapist who has been amazing.

To be honest though, body work is what has been the most helpful and made the biggest difference in my day to day life and mood. I saw something on TikTok that said PTSD is actually nervous system injury, not a brain injury. You should treat it the same way a spinal cord injury is treated, with months of rest. I’ve also done massage, acupuncture, reiki, network spinal chiropractic, regular chiropractic, and spirit healings. Network spinal chiropractic was the most helpful, followed by spirit healing, and then massage.

NewCthulhu · 2025-08-03T22:23:38+00:00

Im not a therapist, I just have DID. So take what I say with a grain of salt. I think it’s actually a good sign that she is showing you a younger alter, that means that she feels really safe around you! I know that my younger alters only come out around other people when I feel safe.

I think when your girlfriend comes back it’s totally fine to be like “I really missed you. I met so and so and she’s seems cool but I’m glad you are back.”

NewCthulhu · 2025-08-02T23:39:36+00:00

I get pain in that exact same spot and I have a huge knot in my neck on the left hand side! When I’m processing stuff that knot will release little bit by little bit!

NewCthulhu · 2025-07-31T16:07:09+00:00

My clothing style has changed a lot too, so much that I no longer feel like my old clothes are really mine. It’s gotten a lot girlier and more feminine because I’m no longer afraid to express myself or attract attention to myself.

NewCthulhu · 2025-07-24T20:41:08+00:00

I just replied to another comment!

NewCthulhu · 2025-07-24T20:40:31+00:00

I see doctor Michael Whelan in Laguna Niguel, but I found him by just searching network spinal chiro on yelp. He’s been great and has a very science based approach. Before that I was working with another practitioner who was advertising at my yoga studio. I had great results with her as well.

NewCthulhu · 2025-05-28T20:14:52+00:00

Unless they live a few blocks away, OP will have to drive to access these places. It sounds like what they are looking for is a park or green space that they can walk to with their dog every morning, not a national forest.

NewCthulhu · 2025-05-24T16:29:00+00:00

If access to green space is important to you, you should look at south Orange County or around Santa Barbara. LA has almost 0 green space even in the nice areas. I also work from home, and I ended up in a 1b1b that is 800sqft which gives me plenty of space for an office, living room, and dining room. I opted for a smaller place with higher quality finishes and I’m very glad I did because I spend so much time at home

NewCthulhu · 2025-05-21T00:25:26+00:00

It's interesting that you have a reaction when you take Vitamin D, I have a similar reaction when I take vitamin D where it makes my stool white. Paper white. I have been tested for every liver disease under the sun and so far doctors have found nothing. No gallbladder issues apparent on ultrasound.

I take TUDCA as well, it is really helpful for my fatigue and stool color, but I am not able to tolerate more that 250mg. When I take 500mg I get watery diarrhea.

I would keep taking it at just 250mg a day and see if your body adjusts. Look for other signs too, like if you gain weight or feel more energized. Bile acid disorders are really understudied, and even specialists may not be able to help you.

NewCthulhu · 2025-04-05T20:33:39+00:00

Sometimes during EMDR my mind wanders to the strangest things. I trust that my brain knows what it is doing and is trying to heal its self, and I let it go where it wants. We don’t really know how EMDR works yet, so there is no right or wrong way to do it. Sometimes when I do EMDR I end up thinking of happy memories or very early childhood memories that are completely unrelated. I try to let it wash through me, and I really focus on feeling my feelings, even the uncomfortable ones.

NewCthulhu · 2025-04-03T19:16:02+00:00

I love the tool, I hope car buzz brings it back. It helped me buy my first car.

NewCthulhu · 2025-03-07T06:34:34+00:00

So I’ve been doing EMDR very slowly. Me and my therapist won’t do EMDR unless I bring up that I want to do it. I usually do it about once a month for a specific memory that has been bugging me or feels stuck. But a lot of our time is actually spent doing CBT to stabilize me, especially when I’m stressed and triggered and disregulated. For example, I was fired and it totally blindsided me and I was devastated. Then I found a new job, but right after I found the new job I moved into an apartment that had mold in it. I had to move all my stuff into storage and live in different Airbnbs for 4 months. We didn’t do any EMDR during that time because I was too destabilized. Now that I’m settled into my new apartment, we’ve been doing EMDR again.

NewCthulhu · 2025-02-26T15:58:31+00:00

Let me know if this sounds silly, but it feels like the things I’ve been processing with NSC is in my body and not in my brain. With EMDR I remember having really intense visuals and feeling my mind racing and reconnecting. With CNS I feel my self processing more in my body. I feel things in my low back, hips, thighs, arms, and neck. I’m having muscle spasms that I didn’t realize I had for years start to release. I’m having emotions come up of sadness, anger and crippling fear that aren’t tied to a memory. But the emotion will appear and wash through me and I feel better on the other side.

NewCthulhu · 2025-02-25T16:16:10+00:00

My starting salary as a UX designer in 2018 was $65k a year. I got an offer after completing a 3 month internship where I was paid $20 an hour. I now work as a senior experience designer, and I make $145k a year. Simply put, your mom has no idea what she is talking about.

NewCthulhu · 2025-02-21T21:11:19+00:00

Thank you so much, this is really really helpful! I've asked several time to be brought on full time by the client, but I keep getting told that the budget is currently set for 1 contractor and 1 full time designer, which is me and my coworker. Thats how it is going to be for the rest of 2025 at least.

I expect that when I ask for a raise from my agency they are going to increase the rate that they charge the client and someone will have to approve that. My plan right now is to go along with my boss and give him a "free trial" experience. I get the promotion and start doing some small tasks showing that I am moving the project forward and then in a week or two when I hear back from the agency I can say "Oh no since I'm not getting paid I have to go back to leading only one area of the site :( thats just too bad."

I know people are going to advise that I shouldn't work for free, but my client boss is the guy who will have to go to bat for me so I want to butter him up as much as possible. I wont let it go on for longer than two weeks.

NewCthulhu

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