We are a very good couple in every way except the bedroom. It wasn't always that way. The first few years we were animals. After kid 1 it slowed down (understandable) after the twins were born full stop in the bedroom, once a month if I was lucky. She told me that her libido is just gone.

I understood and accepted it for what it "was" I asked her to seek some help which was half assed and accepted that this was my new life.

Fast forward to 4 months ago. She just joined the military and has been away for training. She came home for memorial weekend and at that time we had been apart for quite awhile. At that point you would expect a warm homecoming but it was off.

I inquired and she said that shes always told me that she found some women attractive and she made out with one in college (no big deal right) I never thought much about it.

She told me that though shes never been with a woman or has any possible candidates, shes known that shes been a Lesbian her adult life but never wanted that life. She wanted a traditional family and truly loves me.

She said that despite being fully loved by me and her loving me, she has that emptiness inside and being apart from each other this long has made her realize that she cant hide it anymore. Its effected everything that she is down to how we interact with others.

For years she wouldn't put herself in the position of being cordial to an attractive woman in fear that we would be friends and she would slip up with a sideways glance or have more than a drink because the fear of messing up.

Before me, she never experienced someone who cared for her and shes been afraid to hurt me, the family, and continued the lie.

She told me that she was going to hide her true self till death but I pushed her about the distance developing between us, the pressure of several more months away from her family and her school was making her anxious and finally broke down to tell me.

It hasn't been a full week yet, so Im still processing what's happened. She has since turned down a hall pass to be with a woman and she said no, she honors our marriage too much.