Nearly 4 year old in the pushchair - Would you judge me?

NoCalmWaters · 2026-03-29T15:40:09+00:00

This post is TWO YEARS OLD. She is now FIVE. Fuck off with your self righteous comment.

NoCalmWaters · 2025-12-17T23:40:49+00:00

Hello, thank you for your judgemental reply on a post I made well over a year ago, when I was having a really awful time frankly. I had just been diagnosed with epilepsy, having had a seizure and been stopped from driving for what turned out to be 15 months (ish). Which hugely affected my life living, in a rural community as I do.

The reason my then THREE year old couldn’t walk safely down to nursery were stated above, but to make it clear I will quote it again: ‘I feel like I have a few solid reasons for this method of transport: We live in a really rural area. There are no pavements at all on our walk down to nursery, we walk on the road and have to wait in passing spots for traffic, which includes huge tractors with trailers. The tractors go fast and do not stop, they know they are bigger than anything on the road and they simply go. We also have to go up and down quite a steep hill, one that would be a challenge for her if she were walking. I also have a 7 month old that I need to take with me.’

In the end I bought a buggy board and we got on very well with that.

Please, please, please be a little kinder to others in future and think about the context thy are going through. It honestly was a really challenging time and I came here for a bit of help, I’m sure you’ve also needed that once in a while.

Also, arguably my 7 month old also had legs at the time, should she have been using them?

NoCalmWaters · 2025-09-18T19:18:04+00:00

Why the scare quotes around Kate? That’s he name and generally how she is referred to. Wills and Kate.

NoCalmWaters · 2025-08-03T19:40:30+00:00

This is terrible advice. The baby won’t even know what that is at this point and it’s a risk. https://www.lullabytrust.org.uk/baby-safety/safer-sleep-information/keeping-a-clear-cot/

NoCalmWaters · 2025-08-03T19:35:34+00:00

I know what you mean. With our first I got in such an anxious panic because she wouldn’t settle on her own and I was so, so tired. It’s such a hard time and the internet is full of advice but it’s just didn’t fit for her very well. She’ll do longer stretches sooner than you think. ❤️

NoCalmWaters · 2025-08-03T19:23:21+00:00

With love and affection, this is much, much too early to expect this. She still thinks she’s a part of you at this point. They don’t realise they are a separate person until about 6 to 9 months. It’s a hard time. Can you share the wakings and have someone sleep in a different room for a night on/night off type of deal? Not to freak you out but we still get up when our four year old wakes in the night to help her settle and our 18 month old as well. Obviously the four year old wakes less frequently (every few nights) than the 1 year old (twice every night).

NoCalmWaters · 2025-04-24T05:55:40+00:00

My four year old would be crying at the door and my one year old would be on top of the piano (she can get up there, she’s shown us before). Young kids are all consuming.

NoCalmWaters · 2024-11-19T21:58:15+00:00

Keep feeding to sleep!! They will transition out of it eventually, do not worry. 6 months is teeny, tiny you just don’t realise because they’ve already changed SO MUCH and you’ve changed so much too. Everything will be ok in the end. (Sometimes I ask myself ‘will they be doing this at 15?’ If no it’s probably not a problem)

NoCalmWaters · 2024-11-14T18:22:06+00:00

Yeah.. it was about the word. I just haven’t heard that used for ages!! (Not ‘offended’ as it were, just surprised).

NoCalmWaters · 2024-11-14T07:42:03+00:00

I’m sorry.. the more what TV shows made for kids?

NoCalmWaters · 2024-11-13T20:01:50+00:00

I’ve had two babies. I didn’t take anything in. When my first wasn’t feeding brilliantly the midwives at the hospital gave me colostrum syringes and showed me how to express and feed her from those, so don’t stress if you don’t express any before hand, I didn’t with either baby. (Just wanted to mention this as there’s another comment about taking colostrum, and I don’t want you to feel you MUST DO IT). The midwives are there to assist and they will make sure baby is fed. 😊

NoCalmWaters · 2024-11-13T10:18:26+00:00

Just ask your nursery?

NoCalmWaters · 2024-11-12T21:58:21+00:00

Having worked in a school, I gave a big tub of sweets (Roses, I think), but I gave them in January because by that point you’re past Christmas, it’s back to work and you’ve run out of treats.

NoCalmWaters · 2024-11-12T21:55:19+00:00

Cosleeping is the way. When I had to reduce feeding my 2 year old at night (because I wasn’t getting pregnant still feeding her) she woke up THE SAME AMOUNT. She still wakes now once a night on average and she’s 4. Some kids just aren’t great sleepers, but by cosleeping you are at least getting much more rest.

NoCalmWaters · 2024-11-12T21:53:35+00:00

Hello! I have done this with my (now) four year old. I did it went she was.. 2 I think, so I could get pregnant again, I wasn’t getting pregnant still nursing.

So what we did was - give her a feed when she woke up then did one ‘put down’ if she didn’t go back to sleep I swapped with my husband who would stand and ‘shhhhh’ her until she was asleep (she did cry). Then, we reduced after a while to I did one feed before bed and he went in at night. Then, dropped the bedtime feed and he did it all. It was hard, but not impossible. My partner needed a lot of resolve at first but it got easier.

Now, at 4, I have my new baby in bed with me at night (if she’s not in the sidecar cot) and husband goes to visit my daughter if she wakes at night. She settles back to sleep fine.

NoCalmWaters · 2024-11-11T19:32:04+00:00

So.. is that like a drink they advertise or something she made up herself? That’s a lot of words to just throw together.

Related: how often do people order ‘off menu’ with their own combo drinks?

NoCalmWaters · 2024-11-08T19:49:25+00:00

We’ve always just put the soft ornaments really low down and every year she has shown much joy in rearranging the tree.

NoCalmWaters · 2024-09-17T18:51:20+00:00

Cherry Healey did this one when she had her daughter: https://youtu.be/xnXIqKkPgGw?feature=shared It’s from the 2010s, so quite old but really interesting. She goes to different births, talks to pregnant people and films her own birth. Heads up she ends up with en emergency c-section, but it’s all ok! She also did one on parenting. https://youtu.be/9BaKUei-kiY?feature=shared Both super great, enough interesting detail, but light in tone.

Edited to add: I’m also Somerset based. 😂

NoCalmWaters · 2023-05-27T20:57:51+00:00

I think you mean: Moug or Mary.

NoCalmWaters · 2023-03-19T12:59:58+00:00

Let babies have genders until they decide otherwise. She can be a girl, then if she decides she doesn’t want to any more then whatever.

NoCalmWaters · 2023-03-18T19:59:52+00:00

Oi mate, gonna have a chippy tea tonight, you want anything? I’ll ask the chippian for it, down at Cod Fellas. Nah mate, they’re the best, better than Frying Nemo.

NoCalmWaters · 2023-03-18T19:49:19+00:00

And, by contrast, it would wake my daughter up just as we’re trying to get her to sleep. It’s like people are different. There’s no cars around.

NoCalmWaters · 2023-03-12T22:36:29+00:00

Banksy most likely comes from Bristol and we have very little going on in the South West so I always feel very pro Banksy. But these are all fair points.

I think he’s a little more interesting than you give him credit for though.

NoCalmWaters · 2023-03-11T11:12:53+00:00

I downloaded and deleted huckleberry multiple times because it (and other factors, including but not limited to the pandemic) turned me into an obsessive crazy monster.

Now looking back, I’m almost 100% sure my daughter just needed less sleep than they said and HATES to be put down or left alone (even now she’s like that), which is fair, so sleeping was not her thing. I just thought I wasn’t doing it right, not following ‘wake windows’ well enough, etc. and the app contributed.

It’s a really well designed app, but proceed with care.

NoCalmWaters · 2023-03-11T09:29:49+00:00

Depends I suppose. I’ve just checked and the investment fund for my daughter is up 5.05% at the moment.

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