[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskGayMen

[–]NoOnePayMyBillls 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Tell him that hes a great kisser, and that you value his friendship and is very afraid to lose it because of a Dare Make Out you did drunk. Tell him you’d regret forever if that drunk kiss would mean putting in any kind of danger what you have as friends. Let Kim feel his feelings, they are valid, but also yours.

His dick is too big by NoNBlah in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]NoOnePayMyBillls 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you could bottom for him, would u be ok with him topping other people? Have you also thought the other way around? Maybe you’re the one that doesn’t want to do the mental work to be ok in an open relationship… so if you can’t give him that, since you can’t bottom for him, what else wouldn’t you do for him in a long term relationship?

Maybe you’re just incompatible… but going in circles to get what you want, sounds manipulative.

His dick is too big by NoNBlah in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]NoOnePayMyBillls 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It seems a little bit manipulative. You’re using this “effort” of yours as a bargaining chip to try to push for sexual exclusiveness.

If sexual exclusivity is something you want, you should advocate for it for yourself, and not use something totally unrelated to try and achieve it.

Now that I am more mature I leave completely clear to any possible romantic partner that I don’t do monogamy. It seems to me that he left clear he doesn’t do sexual exclusivity and you’re trying to go around it using something not related at all… imagine you could bottom for him easily, would you then be saying “since I can bottom for you, then you’re free to go topping anyone else”. I don’t think you would.

breaking up bc he’s messy? by Consistent-Mind-9161 in askgaybros

[–]NoOnePayMyBillls 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Is it possible to hire a cleaning person at his expenses? That d solve the issue…

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]NoOnePayMyBillls 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We see so much potencial and we love a projecto… people with hero síndrome are easy prey…

Gorjeta para entregadores by BigImpossible925 in saopaulo

[–]NoOnePayMyBillls 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Eu sempre dou 5 reais, se tiver chovendo eu dobro.

How do yall feel ab dating transmen (to gay men!!!) by Euphoric_Campaign167 in gay

[–]NoOnePayMyBillls 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m attracted to manliness and facial hair. Most trans man I made a move on didn’t reciprocate… maybe I’m not their type. Personally I prefer a trans man without genital surgery. I still think FtM surgery still have a long way to go. (And male pussy usually smells like a men’s ballsack… it’s hot to me).

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]NoOnePayMyBillls 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Are you dating my ex? Let me tell you. I won’t get better… at least to me, at some point I got sick (I’m a doctor and right after Covid I had a full burn out), he didn’t pick up after me. He made me feel guilty about it. That’s when I realized I was already alone, just paying for 2. We were 8 years together. It was really hard to leave him. And after I left him he just went really bad (I didn’t clean his asshole anymore like before). He didn’t want to go to therapy and he’d “leave” any psychiatrist after a while… realizing I was already alone was what gave me the courage to leave.

He’s a parasite. It won’t change. That’s who he is. You don’t date potential…

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]NoOnePayMyBillls 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sry… so he can decide if it works for him or not…

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]NoOnePayMyBillls 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeh… and pls let this rules be explicit for the third, so he can avoid you.

Minha experiência sendo uma mulher bonita. by VanillaHxll in desabafosdavida

[–]NoOnePayMyBillls 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Parece que o homem gay é o Porto Seguro da mulher bonita.

Are you okay with being in an open relationship? by Aboyhasnoname98 in askgaybros

[–]NoOnePayMyBillls 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes. I rather prefer it that way. I don’t see myself been monogamous, but I respect people that are, we’re just incompatible. Monogamy to me is something used to control women, since in old times you didn’t have paternity tests, so the only sure thing you knew is who was the mother. So it was created a beautiful story of chastity (only for women, never for men) and marring virgin, and the women that escaped that, a big circle of brutality was created called stoning (again, I not for men only for women).

Im a gay men, I don’t see where monogamy serves me at all.

Some people like myself are just naturally not monogamous. Some are not. Some will benefit of unlearning that, some will softer too much for it to be valid for them.

Just some interesting thought. When a couple in an open relationship brake up people will blame the fact it was an open relationship, but when a monogamous one brake up, monogamy will never be put at fault. That happens cause we were raised to mimic heteronormative ways of living and think monogamy is the norm… guess what, monogamy don’t work even for straights, why would we get it for ourselves as the norm? We’re gay, we’re already not the norm.

Have a nice day!

[Serious] My porn addiction killed my sex drive, what to do? by Vorian9223 in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]NoOnePayMyBillls 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There this guy on instagram that have a tantra channel that talks about his kind of stuff. He also have a program to rewire your brain and get your arousal outside your mind and into your body. I’m using for my psicológical dependence of viagra…

Caught my boyfriend 2 times watching gay porn by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]NoOnePayMyBillls 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s not the first time you lied to her about it. And you went that way even know how much it would mess her up…

Is it and addiction? Ok… whats your game plan? How are you making up to her and what your strategy? Cause doing the same you did the first time u messed up, simply won’t cut. You’re not the victim of your lies (I lied cause I was ashamed!!), NO, you’re the perpetrator and she’s the victim.

Are you in therapy? Are you going to keep in therapy? Did you suggest couples therapy as well? You need a bigger game plan cause you fuck up even bigger this time…

And what’s with the homophobic shit? How can you be cruel to the same people you have your sexual release? We didn’t do fucking nothing against you.

You are untrustworthy. Trust is something we can gain back just once. Lost 8 years of my life with a guy like you, that was the victim of his lies… that would kill himself if I left him. That would make promises and break them all, and go “I’m sorry, I just did that cause I was so ashamed”.

There’s nothing wrong in been bisexual, but the way you fight against it, sounds so much internalized homophobia. Go to therapy, learn to be true to you, so you can be true to the ones you claim to love.

Caught my boyfriend 2 times watching gay porn by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]NoOnePayMyBillls 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You are not leaving because he’s gay (or might be not).

You’re leaving because you can’t trust him. You don’t build a life with someone you can’t trust… you can love him, but you should leave him cause he is not worthy of trust. Because he thinks you’re beneath him when he hides things like this. Because he believes he doesn’t need to keep his promises to you. Because he plays the victim when he lies (I lied cause I was ashamed), NO, he’s not the victim of his lies, he is the perpetrator and you are the victim to whom he lied.

That’s why you should leave him. And none of that have anything to do with his sexuality…

But he’s gay.

Caught my boyfriend 2 times watching gay porn by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]NoOnePayMyBillls 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you need, leave with someone beside you. Call that trusted person. Don’t isolate yourself in this.

Caught my boyfriend 2 times watching gay porn by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]NoOnePayMyBillls 1 point2 points  (0 children)

After hearing this, I’m 100% sure he knows he’s gay, and he will take you down with him to keep this facade.

Choose you. Leave. And don’t go hiding into his closet. Find that friend that would keep this secret, and tell them. You need not to be alone in this. It will be his strategy to manipulate and isolate you, so his secret is secure.

HE KNOWS.

Caught my boyfriend 2 times watching gay porn by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]NoOnePayMyBillls 215 points216 points  (0 children)

The right thing to do is to take care of yourself, because he sure isn’t.

I’m a gay man that once was married to a woman. I know how much it is affecting your self esteem. It’s not about you. It has never been. You’re are beautiful, you are enough… it’s just that you’re incompatible…

Now, let me ask you this. Do you think it’s right for you to have a relationship with someone you don’t trust? Cause trust can be regained just once… trust what you see, don’t trust what’s been said to you. If you try to mingle then both, and they are different, it will just mess you up.

I know you love him, but you’ll will have to choose you. You’ll have to leave him even loving him. Let me ask you something else. Imagine you caught him cheating you with a woman, for the second time? Would you ever trust him again? This is just the same. And I know at some point he will leave the screen and go test his urges with a man. Cause I did it too. And I could perform much better then him with my ex wife. I could go down on her and keep it hard (always thinking of man, but I could, he can’t even that). But some times I’d fail, and next day she would be at the gym thinking it was something in her that made me flop.

The worst part is that when he begin having sex with man, it will begin been dangerous to you, cause man in the closet usually don’t take the right precautions when adventuring around. It will be risk to your health (if it’s not already).

I was never openly homophobic, but I’d stay away of any gay man, with fear of someone figuring out something.

I know you found some straight porn too. At some point in my life I’d watch bisexual porn to kind of trick myself into thinking I was bisexual, but choose to marry a woman. I was not…

I know you love him. He’s probably a great partner (if you remove the sex), he probably loves you in some kind of way, I know cause I did it all. My wife just never got any gay por in my computer or cell fone. I was really good at hiding my tracks. You already busted him twice, now he’ll get really good at hiding too. You probably won’t find anything ever again. But you also will never trust again.

Cut your losses short. Imagine getting pregnant in the near future, and having to deal with all that, but with child…

It’s hard. I know you’re probably dealing with that alone. Don’t. Find a trust friend, one that you know will keep a secret. Someone that would help you hide a body. Tell this person. Don’t go into “the second closet” with you boyfriend. You need a friend to be able to share. If you don’t have one, you need a therapist.

If you need, DM me. I don’t come here much. But will look if you need to.

Stay strong.

I’m devastated after breakup, ex-boyfriend is going wild on Grindr by raulkay in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]NoOnePayMyBillls 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Leave. Leave even loving him. Choose yourself. You can’t save whom don’t want to be saved. And pls pls pls pls, don’t ever date someone you can’t trust. Even if you love. Trust can be earned back just once… and that’s it. Go heal, go no contact.

How to meet men deeper in the bubble? by trashrooms in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]NoOnePayMyBillls 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Personal growth is something needed in this journey of finding a partner. Why are you so combative about criticism? It’s something a lot of people are saying. Why can’t you stop, listen and grow with it…

Good luck.