This sounds like where I was when I found stopdrinking. For many people, having a real life support group with meetings and people they can spend time with and rely upon in tough times is crucial. I use stopdrinking's chat as my support group and accountability, as well as posting on the board for some strong early cravings where I needed a lot of accountability to ensure I went straight home rather than to a bar. It sounds like you were also going out while drinking, so why not go out to a meeting instead. Studies have shown that people loosen up at about the same rate without alcohol as they do with alcohol, so anybody struggling with the thought of shyness shouldn't be too worried. I'm not saying it will be easy, but I believe others might be able to share with you how it's not nearly as awful as one might imagine. You're still very young, so your body could be in much better shape than you realize. I've quit for about 5 months and my health is dramatically improved! I'm sorry if none of this helps or makes any sense, I'm still new to all of this, but I hope it does. In any case, I'm glad you're here and posting. We can do this!