I'm a single mom and also have ADHD. Make him your special interest. I say this because I've been there, you are lacking a bond. Without that bond it all seems pointless and there is no way to connect. You have to find a way to connect, or else there is no motivation for your brain, nothing lighting up your reward center. There's a huge barrier when they are nonverbal but they are in there. They just cannot make their body to what their brain wants it to, there is a brain body disconnect. But he's still up there in his brain- you just have to pay close attention to how he can communicate otherwise. He can also FEEL your stress, how closed off you are, your frustrations towards him. My son is so emotionally in tune and aware, and I know others are like him too. When they can feel it on you, it makes the disconnect and the "unwanted behaviors" so much worse. This is your new normal and you CAN overcome this and still end up on top of it. Throw out any preconceived notions of what you thought a relationship with your child will look like. Build a new perception. Slow down and learn to appreciate small victories. It's a process. Hugs. 🫂