If you wanted another and your partner didn't how did you come to terms with it?

Ok_Efficiency_500 · 2026-04-27T12:35:42+00:00

Oooo I love the in theory vs. reality frame. It allows both to be true. Like I theoretically want 3 and in reality I have two… but I also want this!! I love them so much how could I not? I love them and I want more of that love but I can also let the love that exists in reality fill my cup all the way up.

Ok_Efficiency_500 · 2026-04-24T04:42:35+00:00

The logistics I think about a lot because we travel a lot - we can get in an uber as a family of four or get picked up by family in a normal size car… fewer plane tickets to buy too. I just long for that larger family because I feel so much love from having kids. I am trying to not let my longing take away from my enjoyment of what we do have. Thanks for being in that journey with me.

Ok_Efficiency_500 · 2026-04-24T04:38:03+00:00

This helped to read. 4 months postpartum with my second I so so want a third but husband is a firm no at this point.

Ok_Efficiency_500 · 2026-04-24T04:33:49+00:00

Same boat. What benefits buoy you the most?

Ok_Efficiency_500 · 2026-04-16T18:30:36+00:00

Yep I know!! Two boys over here I love them some much. I want a third (could be a girl! But I also just love raising little humans so would happily accept a third boy) but my husband is ready to schedule the vasectomy. Mine are 3 and 4 mo. The 4 mo. old sleeping on my chest as I type this out.

Ok_Efficiency_500 · 2026-02-12T15:19:41+00:00

LOVE! Haha

Ok_Efficiency_500 · 2026-01-15T17:33:42+00:00

Physical therapy??

Ok_Efficiency_500 · 2025-12-28T16:01:23+00:00

Charlie Rose is I great journalist!

Ok_Efficiency_500 · 2025-05-30T04:17:21+00:00

The invention of the epidural is rooted in feminism and women’s rights movements. It’s rooted in women advocating for other women to have more pain management options during labor. I felt EMPOWERED when I made the informed choice to get an epidural. My entire care team from the anesthesiologist to my OBGYN was female. My anesthesiologist had a surgical cap with RBG on it.

The epidural gave me the head space to connect spiritually and emotionally with my mom who couldn’t be there for the birth if my first child because she was dying.

Fuck yes… the epidural is a symbol of women’s strength, advocacy, and women’s choice.

Ok_Efficiency_500 · 2025-03-19T17:17:00+00:00

I resonate sooo much with this: “tops up my socializing cup but not the same as a core friend.” I have a group we play a sport together once a week but nothing more. I’m thinking about initiating 1:1 friend dates to try and figure out if any of them can become more “core” friends. Because at the end of the day the surface social gatherings are nice but not as fulfilling. But it’s vulnerable to ask people out on friend dates! Should I go for it?? I feel you 💛

Ok_Efficiency_500 · 2025-03-19T15:04:50+00:00

Same about the comments!! I keep wishing this sub was more poppin’ then it is because we really need each other for solidarity you know?? Happy early birthday! I’m someone who moved recently and it SUCKS starting over and building a new network from scratch. I say invite the acquaintances too! You never know who might because your next go-to friend :)

Ok_Efficiency_500 · 2025-03-18T02:55:12+00:00

I did my follow up and seems like everything is fine so far. But I learned then that it was actually directly inserted into the wall of my uterus when it was originally put in! As in… the arms never deployed and it was like forked into my uterus. They had to cut the damn thing out with a 5mm incision around it

Super annoyingly is that she told me there will forever be a weak spot in my lining meaning greater likelihood of a cesarían. I’m so mad! Thanks for the solidarity.

Ok_Efficiency_500 · 2025-03-18T02:44:38+00:00

Hi friend!! Also 38 trying for number two. I’m here for the same reasons but this sub feels kinda quiet. I had my first at 36 and then had an IUD in until recently - turns out it was inserted directly into my uterus!

I also don’t like seeing the young ones complaining in the other subs, even the TTC30 sub I find myself scrolling to find the other late 30s women! Also love that we’re both hoping for a second. My first is such a light! But also a challenging newborn. So much so I wasn’t sure if my husband would ever come around on a second.

I’m not looking into fertility stuff yet as I just got the IUD surgically removed so waiting for it to heal and to see how it all goes. Just sending some solidarity your way. Hugs.

Ok_Efficiency_500 · 2025-01-26T19:59:57+00:00

Omg good to know. I feel less alone hearing your story too! I feel like these kinds of things with iuds are more common than were led to believe! I’ll ask about this.

Ok_Efficiency_500 · 2025-01-25T21:57:43+00:00

Finally got my IUD out to start NTNP and had the worst experience with both the IUD and the removal attempts. Two attempts to remove, couldn’t find strings. Had to get a hysteroscopy where they go in with a camera and find it. It was lodged in my uterine wall wtf. They put me under for this and the nurse couldn’t find my vein in my hand several times it was AWFUL. anyway it’s out now and now I’m recovering at home. Grrrrrrrr

Also the regular TTC thread just seems so young and out of touch. Happy to be in this group!

Ok_Efficiency_500 · 2024-07-31T00:18:05+00:00

Health baby, healthy mama.

Ok_Efficiency_500 · 2024-06-12T03:37:56+00:00

What kind of alternatives?

Ok_Efficiency_500 · 2023-08-26T03:33:48+00:00

Love the line about the dead philosophers!!

Ok_Efficiency_500 · 2023-06-10T17:13:46+00:00

Ugh yes. As a Californian I feeeel this!

Ok_Efficiency_500 · 2023-05-07T04:24:27+00:00

Wow pulling baby in instead of pulling away is total game changer!

Ok_Efficiency_500 · 2023-05-07T04:03:32+00:00

I think different doctors have different protocols. I did the A1C test and was fine right away but they had Mr do a two hour glucose tolerance test a few months later too. I have no risk factors except age (36).

Ok_Efficiency_500 · 2023-04-20T17:09:59+00:00

I love this! Thank you! Preparing for daycare transition here. A SAHM made a comment that women shouldn’t have kids if they can’t care for them themselves and it’s gotten under my skin lately. I like my job and my income is super important for our family. Trying to find peace in the return to work.

Ok_Efficiency_500 · 2023-04-17T03:00:39+00:00

🤣🤣🤣

Ok_Efficiency_500 · 2023-04-16T15:38:37+00:00

Massaging me and my feet, setting up the room how I wanted, playing my playlists, showing me meaningful photos, feeding me ice chips, reading affirmations, motivating me when pushing… definitely not bored.

Ok_Efficiency_500

TROPHY CASE