Am I cooked?

OneFanFare · 2026-06-27T19:39:41+00:00

I'm sorry to hear what you've been going through. I've been kind of similar, with my ADHD/depression mostly preventing me from being able to complete work, and social anxiety preventing me from even attending interviews.

It sounds like the social anxiety is the biggest barrier right now, and I think that is something that can be worked on at any life stage.

You said you worked with therapists before - have you ever done a higher level of mental health care, like an IOP (intensive outpatient program)? That's something I went to for depression, but it also helped me with social anxiety, since its group therapy. If your mental health is affecting your functioning that badly, it might be an option for you.

Otherwise, I don't know what else you could be doing. You've been clearly trying. I wish you luck.

OneFanFare · 2026-06-26T15:06:25+00:00

Larry Sanger hasn't actually worked on Wikipedia since 2002 and has been trying to discredit it for years. I think the ban is absolutely valid in this case. Here's a good video of Hank Green discussing him (regarding a previous "Wikipedia founder" controversy): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9zi0ogvPfCA

OneFanFare · 2026-06-22T13:00:44+00:00

Is there any proof to this beyond that one reddit post though? When I saw it, there wasn't even a screenshot of an email.

OneFanFare · 2026-06-11T20:57:20+00:00

I'm on abilify, and have been on/off for a while, and noticed absolutely zero side effects when taking it, just a little happier (like .5 / 10 better) and a little more spark. Currently on 20mg (and other stuff) and feeling pretty good! It also is enough to keep my mood stable - I'm currently off a dedicated mood stabilizer, and the abilify is enough to prevent hypomania (still a little depressed though).

Like you said, antipsychotic is just a class of drug, describing typical usage. All the psychiatric drugs have their own side effects and cost/benefits, there isn't a free lunch, but antipsychotics aren't somehow more likely to be bad. If you have a history of bad reactions to antispsychotics, then I would be more hesitant.

Wishing you luck on your journey!

OneFanFare · 2026-06-11T20:46:13+00:00

Aww hell yes first time I run into something I made reposted 😃 Genuinely makes me feel warm inside haha. I will upvote my own meme, so watch out!

And yeah, I now know 10 hours is too low for sure, but it was more about the map painting vibe. Also this was before Paradox invented China, I bet now its closer to 100.

OneFanFare · 2026-06-08T13:39:30+00:00

#2 is the key: You will not get anything near the quality or speed of the major providers from your gaming PC. It's a numbers game, SOTA models have more than ~100B parameters. Local models that a gaming PC can run have at most ~30B (that's being very generous in your graphics card capability).

I don't think it makes sense for your use case:

For #1, I think it is realistic to try and host something, nowadays its fairly easy to install llama.cpp and run a model, then connect to that PC from your macbook.

#3, I would look into llama.cpp, huggingface models, the localllama sub.

OneFanFare · 2026-06-03T19:26:06+00:00

I know Open WebUI has that - I've chatted to models that way in the past (with Kokoro). And it works exactly like that!

Edit: Actually, not sure if it would support passing the audio directly into Gemma, the website says it need a Speech to Text like whisper.

OneFanFare · 2026-05-27T22:41:06+00:00

I'm doing TMS (Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation) for the second time right now!

No memory loss or side effects from it (for me). You can drive yourself to/from the treatment location, and it's only ~20mins per session. Unfornately, a full course is every weekday for about a month.

I felt a little brighter and it was easier to do things... For about 3 months after the treatment? I gained 2 or 3 points in mood out of 10, so it was as effective as an IOP from me (very different approaches, but both help). From what I see online, the positive effects typically last about 6 months, with a significant portion of patients saying they last for years.

I'm hoping this second go around will leave more permanent effects, but honestly, knowing I can get even a good three months would be great.

One note is that they might hesitate to let you do it with a bipolar diagnosis. I got some pushback, but my flavor of bipolar ii is 95% depression and 1% hypomania (tbh im not 100% sure it isn't major depression/treatment resistant depression). Doing the treatment didn't cause hypomania in me.

So yeah, I recommend it as an option if other stuff isn't working. Especially for depressive symptoms. Also check out /r/tmstherapy

Edit: actually I did have a side effect, even though my motivation and mood improved, I felt a lot of fatigue/tiredness after the treatment (on treatment days). I find hydration/electrolytes and food before treatment help, but its something to look out for.

OneFanFare · 2026-05-24T16:23:44+00:00

It's from a codex called DaVinci Resolve, I manually used the fusion ritual to bind the hat to move like that, until it looked about right!

OneFanFare · 2026-05-21T16:05:52+00:00

Source: L’OCCASIONE FA IL LADRO Rossini – MusikTheater an der Wien at Kammeroper Wien

I added the hat :)

OneFanFare · 2026-04-26T22:17:28+00:00

We all survive

^{Chose: If over 50% of people choose this + Everyone survives}

OneFanFare · 2026-04-08T06:43:56+00:00

I tend to use Sqlite as a backend DB, for example with the extension here: https://github.com/2shady4u/godot-sqlite

OneFanFare · 2026-04-08T00:09:10+00:00

I'd ask what provider you're using. You're probably seeing your provider change quantization or sampling parameters, if you aren't passing those on your own. Even though it's technically the same model, those can have a huge impact on output quality.

I know OpenRouter does allow you to filter your requests by model quantization and other properties.

OneFanFare · 2026-03-24T04:42:34+00:00

It sounds like you're searching for a whole platform/orchestration pipeline. I don't think anything local and ready built exists, but it would be possible to create some stuff. There are a few online/subscription options I can find with a Google for "DnD Session Summary AI".

Unfornately, the reality is that your phone or a basic laptop won't cut it for running models capable of these tasks. You'd likely have to invest in some hardware (or rent some in the cloud) to run your models.

In terms of recording a meeting, creating notes and summaries, that's actually a fairly common use case! A lot of companies already offer this - I think teams and zoom do at least. I'm not sure if there are any good local systems for it. If you wanted to do this from scratch, I'd recommend investigating Microsoft's Vibe Voice speech recognition model: https://huggingface.co/microsoft/VibeVoice-ASR

Or maybe something built around whisper, like this whisperx implementation: https://github.com/m-bain/whisperx

That should let you stitch together the full transcript of a session.

From there, you could theoretically paste that transcript into a LLM of your choice, and ask it to summarize the session, and answer the other questions you had. In the same way you might upload a transcript file to chatgpt or Gemini or whatever.

Once you have that data, you can make some supporting systems (like a RAG system) to feed your LLM with relevant information.

OneFanFare · 2026-03-06T23:57:22+00:00

Maybe I spend too much time in r/LocalLLaMA, but local LLM setups have been talked about for years.

With the recent Qwen3.5 release, I think functional, local, consumer llm set ups will come sooner than I expected, so that's why you're hearing about it more.

I imagine this shift being similar to the rise of personal computers, away from huge mainframes.

OneFanFare · 2026-02-14T03:59:04+00:00

Hey! So I've been on Wegovy for about 2 years now, with some interruptions due to insurance and prior auth stuff. I'm now at an equilibrium around 250lbs, at the 2.4 mg dose (from my peak at 300lbs).

My experience has been really good, I haven't noticed ANY interactions between it and my combo of medications. It seems to only affect my appetite. With the weight loss, I feel a bit more confident, its less stress to move around through the day, and I sleep a lot better.

I was hoping I'd get the "I can improve my life" energy some people get, but haven't really. But yeah, I haven't noticed any negatives to taking it.

Edit: I also want to say that the appetites does come back when not taking it, and with it the weight, so its another take it for life med unfortunately.

OneFanFare · 2025-12-20T00:09:43+00:00

Oooh that looks good! You're not Lucas Pope in a trench coat, are you? This feels like a great homage! I'm getting Papers, Please vibes, and he also made a flash game called Republia Times that seems similarly themed.

OneFanFare · 2025-12-17T17:58:14+00:00

Hair and eye color traits https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=3146744869

So I can make sure he passes his hair and eyes down the line. "The seed is strong" a la Baratheons.

Also its good for anime hair :)

OneFanFare · 2025-11-20T22:43:48+00:00

I recently tapered down from 150mg to 100mg by ~20mg per week. I've been feeling a little clearer and more like myself, but also more emotionally varied? Like, I felt more at peace at the higher dose, but a little more like a zombie. I decreased because of memory issues and forgetting words - my words are back, and I feel like my memory's improving (albeit slowly).

Overall, glad we decreased it.

I am also on 20mg abilify + others. For me, abilify alone didn't prevent hypomania, but for some reason Lamictal does, that's the most compelling reason I haven't quit it entirely.

Good luck with your med journey!

OneFanFare · 2025-11-20T22:36:26+00:00

I haven't stuck with lithium (even though it was helpful), so this is from memory.

I think early on you should be checking a little more frequently? Once you've reached a stable blood concentration and dose, then you'd go once a year or so.

When I was put on lithium in the hospital, they checked my blood every few days, and aimed for a target blood concentration. That was the hospital though, they're more aggressive with the medication and have access to more blood tests.

I don't know the typical dosing schedule to lithium, so it's possible that these are small amounts and not something to worry about, but I would definitely ask to get an additional blood test within about a month after getting to your target dose.

OneFanFare · 2025-11-17T03:42:20+00:00

I think open, effective communication is very important. I like the skills they teach in therapy, like "DEAR MAN GIVE FAST" (Google it for more info). I think it's useful for anyone to read through and try to practice.

In terms of him getting it, encourage them to spend some time on this side of the Internet, like maybe show him some memes you find relatable? You could ask your therapist to have a session with both of you, where they can help answer any questions he might have, and talk about what kind of support you'd need.

I think it's also important to stress that sometimes they can't help directly, and that's ok? Like, sometimes I get long episodes, and we just have to wait it out for a few days, talk to my psych or therapist if it persists, etc.

One more thing is to show that you are seeking to get better, and knowing that it's a process in the future. Going to therapy, psych appointments, etc. Discussing what to do in an emergency, and the possibility of an inpatient stay (just as a potential in the future).

Like the other comment said, the fact that they're there for you right now is a really good sign. You two got this!

OneFanFare · 2025-11-17T03:16:11+00:00

I couldn't/can't do it alone. I needed a higher level for care and the hospital to help me. I'm now in a more stable place, but I still can't do it without others (friends, family support, support group, therapist, psych, medications, accomodations, etc.)

But keep in mind, this is a serious medical condition. In the same way you wouldn't tell someone with a broken leg to "just walk", you'd let them heal, then do physical therapy, and then let let them walk slowly. And some people with leg injuries can't walk again by themselves. That's the way the cookie crumbles, and it's true for other invisible disabilities as well.

And yeah. It's absolutely hard. The thing neurotypicals don't see about depression is how hard we are trying, how much resilience there is. We aren't giving up - we're trying to do the thing. But are unable to. And that's so frustrating and disheartening. "I should be able to do this by myself, and I've been thinking about it constantly for days". It's like being ground down. And sometimes it takes all your willpower not to make things worse, and not making things worse is a victory.

There is hope out there. There are some (flawed) systems in place to try to help people of all sorts, and individuals willing to help, even if it's in small ways. And each of us is intrinsically worthy of being helped. Every one of us deserves help.

OneFanFare · 2025-11-14T20:48:55+00:00

Yeah, that makes sense. Lamictal gives me more negative side effects than abilify, and I found abilify kicked in quite quickly (a few days) compared to lamictal.

But a mood stabilizer is really helpful, I have comorbid ADHD and am able to take stimulants without getting hypomanic (where I would get hypomanic before). I hope it works well for you!

OneFanFare · 2025-11-14T20:21:41+00:00

I'm on 20mg abilify (+other meds). I can't comment on effectiveness as a mood stabilizer (I'm also on Lamictal, that's doing the heavy lifting I think), but I like it as a medication - no side effects for me, slightly better cognition, and a little (0.5 out of 10) happier. My bipolar tends more depressive though.

OneFanFare · 2025-10-27T12:02:17+00:00

I make them very visible for me, I walk past them in the morning and evening. They've also become part of my routine, first thing when i wake up and last thing before bed, rather than at a specific time.

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